Lizzie sat down on the couch beside Yvonne and curled her feet up under her.
“Louisa was pregnant before she died. Apparently, she didn’t tell Adam because he thought they’d agreed to wait to have kids until they were twenty-five. I only knew about it because I caught her puking her guts up when she came to see me one day. I figured it was the cancer drugs. She made me promise not to tell anyone.” Lizzie sighed. “She had this mad idea that if she could just hang in there for a few months longer, she’d be able to give Adam a baby to remember her by. I told her it was too risky, but she was determined.”
Yvonne nodded sympathetically.
“I assumed she must have told Adam because he stopped trying to make her take any new drugs.” Lizzie grimaced. “I didn’t realize he’d just given up fighting because he was aware that her time was so limited.”
“That must have been very difficult for both of them,” Yvonne said.
“The other night we were talking about Carlos’s treatment. Adam compared him to Louisa, and I”—Lizzie paused—“put my great big foot in it, and reminded him that Louisa hadn’t tried the newest drugs because she was trying to protect their baby.”
“And Adam didn’t know.” Yvonne pressed her fingers to her mouth. “Dear Lord, the poor man.”
“He blamed me. He called me a liar—as if I was just saying it to make his life worse.”
“Shock makes people react in different ways.” Yvonne nodded. “I’m not saying he was right to blame you—he certainly wasn’t—but I can almost understand him going on the defensive rather than letting it sink in.”
“Which is what I tried to say to him. He must’ve been feeling awful.” Lizzie nodded. “I said I’d be happy to talk it through when he calmed down, but he wasn’t having any of it.” She swallowed hard. “He looked at me as if he hated me. I just couldn’t deal with that again.”
“I’m so sorry, Lizzie.” Yvonne patted her hand. “But maybe, when Adam’s calmed down and thought things through, he’ll—”
“He’ll do nothing.” Lizzie cut across her friend. “Even if he realizes he was at fault, he’ll still blame me. He’ll hide up there on that ranch and let another dozen years go by without apologizing to my face. I’ve seen it all before, and I’m not holding my breath.”
“But he’s in love with you, too,” Yvonne persisted. “Maybe this time he’ll get things right and realize what he’s about to lose.”
“He’s already met and married the love of his life, Yvonne. Even if he does love me, I’ll never measure up to how he felt about Louisa.” Lizzie finally allowed her tears to fall. “I’ve just got to learn to live with that.”
* * *
“What the hell is wrong with you today?”
Adam’s dad pointed his fork at him across the kitchen table. Adam had spent the day working hard on the far reaches of the ranch and was physically exhausted. He just wished his mind would stop circling around the drain of Lizzie’s comments about Louisa.
“And where’s Lizzie? Did you make her get up and go home last night? I told her it was okay if she stayed.”
Adam finally met his father’s gaze. “She decided she wanted to leave.”
“It’s okay, Dad.” Ben spoke up. “I took her home.”
“You did?” His father’s attention swung toward Ben. “Why?”
Ben shrugged. “I was awake tending that sick calf. I made sure she got home safely.”
“How’s the calf?”
“On the mend.”
Adam glanced at Ben who had avoided talking to him all day and was obviously still mad. Would he tell their father about the argument? In the mood he was in, Adam wasn’t quite certain.
“Leanne’s leaving for New York in a few days,” Jeff said as he set his silverware down on the plate.
“But I’m planning to come back soon.” Leanne smiled at her children. “If that’s okay with all of you?”
She received a lot of positive replies. Even Daisy was smiling at her. Adam wasn’t in the mood to be nice so he kept quiet. Of course, his dad picked up on it.