With Every Breath (Slow Burn 4)

“I thought I was in love, but I was so wrong. You’ve shown me what love is, how beautiful and selfless it is and I want it more than I want to breathe, but I’m so scared, because I don’t know how to love someone the way you deserve to be loved. It terrifies me to care so much about someone. To have so much—all—of my happiness depend on one person.”

For a moment Wade didn’t respond. He didn’t seem capable. He closed his eyes, his relief a living, breathing entity, and it was then she noticed that he was trembling just as she had been shaking a short time ago. When he reopened his eyes, they were so full of love and understanding that they looked near to bursting and they were lighter than she’d ever seen them before.

“Now you understand how I feel,” he said gruffly. “I’ve never loved anyone in my life, Eliza. Never even knew what love was, what it felt like, what it meant. It’s beautiful and scary as hell all at the same time. You think you have ugliness? You have nothing on me. I’m not a good man. I’ve done things you can’t even imagine and I’ve never suffered a single regret. But that’s over with now because I would never risk you that way. I will never let anything ugly touch you again and if that means me going straight and becoming legitimate then I’m more than willing to do that if it means I have you. You are everything to me, which is why I’m not letting you risk yourself to take this maniac down. I will always stand in front of you and anything that puts you in harm’s way. You need to understand that and deal, Eliza. Life with me won’t be easy. I’m an overbearing, controlling bastard and I will never allow you to take risks with your safety.”

He framed her face and looked fiercely into her eyes as if willing every bit of his impassioned statement to be permanently engraved in her mind, her heart and her soul.

“But, baby, I can promise you this. If you take a chance on me. If you stand with me and by me and never give up on us, and if you’re willing to risk it all for a man who isn’t nearly good enough for you but loves you and wants you with every beat of his heart, then I will always do anything to make you happy. There is no sacrifice I won’t make. No dream you have that will go unfulfilled. No wish that will not come true. And you will be the most treasured, cherished, pampered, spoiled, loved and adored woman who ever lived. I vow it on my life.”

“Not good enough for me?” she whispered incredulously.

She stared at him in utter stupefaction. Not good enough? Was he insane?

“Wade, do you even realize what you’re taking on? How much baggage comes with me? You deserve so much more than I’ll ever be able to give you,” she choked out, stifling the sob that lodged in her throat. “But I’ll make you a promise as well. If you’re willing to risk so much for someone as damaged and unworthy as I am then I will spend every single day doing everything I can to make sure you don’t ever regret taking a chance on me.”

“I love you,” he said. Just that. Nothing more. But it was enough. It would always be enough. It was all she’d ever dreamed of, wished for, hoped for and it was what she’d never thought she’d have.

“I love you too,” she whispered.

She closed her eyes, savoring these few stolen moments, knowing that all too soon reality would once more intrude and they would be forced back into the real world where evil was far too prevalent.

“What do we do now?” she asked quietly, her heart clenching, filled with dread for what was to come.

Wade shrugged. “We wait for him to make his move. But, in the meantime, I’m going to take you to bed and spend the rest of the afternoon making love to you.”

TWENTY-TWO

DUSK had fallen, casting shadows across the bedroom where Eliza lay nestled in Wade’s arms, both on their sides, facing one another, legs tangled, their bodies molded tightly together. She purposely cleared her mind to everything but the intimacy that blanketed the entire room and the sensation of lying next to the man she loved and who loved her.

Wade had made love to her, drawing out her pleasure until she’d been mindless with want and need, her desire for him the most desperate, urgent sensation she’d ever experienced. He’d given her the words over and over, but he’d also shown her his love by touching, caressing, kissing, licking and sucking every inch of her body from head to toe, spending extra time on the parts in between.

He’d been in no hurry. No rush to orgasm. No quick slaking of lust and desire. He’d taken his time, bringing her to the brink of release only to back off and give her just enough time for the edge to not be as sharp and then he began all over, taking her up the peak again and again delaying her release until she was in complete freefall. Weightless and floating in a sea of indescribable pleasure.

When he finally brought her to completion, she’d fallen apart in his arms, utterly shattered by the beauty of having a man who loved her without measure make sweet love to her. Tears had slid down her cheeks, joy filling every place deeply hidden that had been barren and devoid of any feeling for so long. He reached every one of those dark places and brought light and life to them all.

And afterward, he’d held her while she cried, this time overwhelmed by the realization that she was finally home. She finally belonged. She was finally loved and wholly accepted without conditions, reservations or judgment.

Then he’d made love to her again. And again, until they’d fallen into a light sleep, content to rest in each other’s arms and soak up every minute of the start of something new and special, the first day of their future together and the promise of many tomorrows.

Eliza had awakened first and lay quiet and unmoving as she studied Wade’s handsome features at rest. His face lost the natural harshness that was such a part of his personality and he looked younger, more relaxed and at peace. She could spend hours simply watching him, smug in the knowledge that this beautiful man was hers.

She was loose and limber, completely sated and content. Her eyelids were slowly closing as she surrendered once again to the lure of sleep when the peel of Wade’s cell phone startled her, making her flinch.

Wade came instantly awake, rotating to his other side to reach down and snag his phone.

“Sterling,” he said shortly.

There was a pause as Wade listened to whatever the other person was saying and then Wade’s next words froze her to the bone.

“No. He’s mine. Sit on him. Do not let him out of your sight, and make sure he goes nowhere until I get there. My men will remain here to protect Eliza. I’ll be there as soon as possible.”