A wave of nausea hit me, and I tore upstairs, emptying my stomach of the copious amounts of scotch still lingering. After, I had a shower, and more Tylenol. I kept hearing her words, and the pain behind them. My behavior of the past year played on repeat in my head. My cruel jibes, my harsh words, and my ignorant manner. Despite how I treated her, she had put the needs of someone else first and kept her head up. She did her job, and I had to admit she did it well, with pride, and zero positive input from me.
I studied my face in the mirror, my hand too shaky to lift a razor to the scruff on my chin. For the first time in my life, I felt the heat of shame burn through me, and I dropped my gaze.
I had two choices.
Ignore what happened last night and hope Katharine would continue with our arrangement. I knew if I didn’t bring it up, she wouldn’t either. She would assume I didn’t remember what had occurred.
Or, act like a mature adult and find her, apologize, and try to move forward. In order to do that, I needed to make a concerted effort, and at the very least, understand her. I had no doubt, the wedding was now off the table, but we could still continue as an engaged couple.
I pushed off the counter, ignoring the thumping of my head.
It was time to find out more about my fiancée.“Richard, I didn’t expect to see you today. Or at least not this early.”
I looked up from my computer screen. “Oh, Graham.” I tugged on my cowlick and ran my hand over my neck nervously. “I had a few things I wanted to get, and, ah, pick up my car.”
He came into my office, sitting down in front of my desk. I folded my hands on the dark wood, trying to stop my fingers from twitching.
“I need to apologize for last night. I drank too much. Trust me, that wasn’t normal behavior for me.”
He laughed, waving his hand. “We’ve all been there, Richard. After everything you’ve gone through and starting with us, then of course, your big day today, I think you deserved to cut loose.”
“I hope I didn’t do anything inappropriate.”
He shook his head. “No, you were fine. I think you drove poor Katy around the bend a little. It was amusing to watch.”
I thought of my conversation with her and grimaced. “She wasn’t happy with me.” Then I frowned as his words sank in. “I’m sorry, Graham, what did you mean by ‘my big day’ when you said that?”
He smirked. “You rather let it out of the bag you were getting married this afternoon, Richard.”
“I–I said that?”
“You did. Katy kept trying to shush you, but you seemed determined to let out the secret.”
“No wonder she was ready to kill me. I don’t even remember.”
“I think she’ll forgive you.” He winked. “I’m not certain my wife and Jenna will, however. They wanted to help Katy with the wedding.”
“I’m sorry?” I offered.
“It’s fine. They’re happy with the dinner you agreed to afterward.”
I swallowed. Holy shit. How could I remember the entire conversation with Katharine and not recall a single word of this verbal diarrhea I had with the Gavins? What the hell else had I said?
“Dinner?”
“Katy explained how private you both wanted your actual ceremony. You were so eloquent when you added your thoughts on why you wanted it to be the two of you, it made Laura tear up.”
I blinked at him. I did that?
“After they agreed not to crash your day, you agreed to allow us to host a dinner for you tonight.” He ran his hands over his thighs. “Are you sure you don’t want to take the next week off for a honeymoon?”
“Ah, no. We have other plans. Katharine wants to get to work on making my place, ah, our place, a little homier. I’ll take her away once we’re more settled.”
He nodded, stood, and held out his hand. “Congratulations, Richard. I hope today is everything you want it to be.”
I took his hand, shaking it firmly. “Thank you.”
“I think today is the start of a new, great life for you.” He flashed me a smile. “I’m thrilled to be a part of the new direction.”
He walked out, leaving me staring after him.
After last night, I wasn’t sure Katharine would even speak to me today, never mind marry me. She was out when I left, and she hadn’t answered her phone when I tried to call earlier.
I turned back to my computer. I had narrowed down my search, and I was sure I had found the home where Penny Johnson now resided. It was close to my place, private, and from the information I found on the website, expensive. I picked up the phone and dialed the number.