“She has to start her life,” Saint tells him what I said, and Blaze just stares at me“So, start your life here with us.” two of the women walk in half-naked as usual, so I look down not sure where to look, just another reason to move out. So, I don’t have to see naked women or men having sex or walking around like its ok that everyone can see what god gave them“Just ignore them,” Zoey tells me, but I have to get out of here away from Blaze, from these women, it’s all too much“I’m going to my room,” I tell them and leave as fast as I can. As I make my way through the main room, I see a few of the guys leaving and wonder what the guys do here, do they work. I know that Brayden used to work at the Strip club that the club own, but what do the others do. I look back towards the kitchen and wonder what Blaze does for a living, does he work at the strip club.As I walk to the stairs Bliss walks around the corner, bumping into me “Watch where you're walking” she says pushing me back“Sorry I didn’t see you.”“So, when are you leaving? all the others are gone,” she looks me up and down, smirking, and I want to cover myself, but I purposely leave my hands at my side. “Or are you going to stay on as a club-whore, not that you’d fit in your too fat,” she mocks me smiling like all the other women I’ve come across in my life and a husband who constantly told me I was a fat bitch and was never good enough. I frown at her looking down, and that worthless feeling comes over me, and I cover my stomach and go to walk past her but stop (you’re a survivor) I tell myself feeling a burst of confidence.“I have more respect in myself than to let a bunch of guys fuck me for a roof over my head” I smile, feeling proud but bad because I tried to make her feel like shit, she gives me the stink eye stepping forward, and I step back my back to the wall all confidence gone“Don’t think you're better than me cause you’re not, yeah, I fuck the guys, but I do it because I like it especially Blaze. When he fucks me in the ass, or when I come all over his face as he licks me out umm...” she tells me smiling, and I step back needing space from her, and she laughs. “Or when he ties me up and fucks me hard, shoving that big cock of his in every hole,” she taunts me, smiling and I push past her out the door of the clubhouse, Bliss’s cackling laughter pissing me off (god I need to get out of here).“Hey Ella”“Hey Steven, can you let me out please?” I ask him a little shaken from my encounter with Bliss (Bliss what sort of a name is that) “fucking Bitch” I mumble“Who’s a fucking bitch?” Steven asks me, and I look up at him“What?” I ask, and he chuckles“You said Fucking bitch? and who fucked you off?” he asks me, but I shake my head stepping closer to the gate“No one” I lie, and he nodsYou sure you’re ok?” he asks, and I look up at him smiling, trying to ease his expression“I’m fine, I just need a walk is all.”“Alright, well, be careful and don’t be gone too long.” I nod as he opens the gate and I turn right and walk away from the clubhouse.I make my way to the cemetery again and find myself staring at two filled holes and lay between them like last time. “Hey Bray, I miss you so much.” I stare up at the sky as birds fly over, clouds make all sorts of shapes, and the sun shines down. “I’m finding a lot out about your club big brother and to say I’m a little shocked is an understatement.” I laugh thinking about Zoey and Saint’s faces, they look so happy, and I want that. I want to be that happy with someone who only looks at me. “Hey Bray, I know I should have told you more often, but I love you so much, and I’ll come and see you all the time ok.” I stand up and notice the graveyard looking a little messy and see the older gentlemen that was here last time and I make my way over to him“Hi,” I say, and he turns to look at me“Hello,” he says“Um… I’m going to be coming around a lot, and I was looking around; would you like some help with the gardening?” he looks at me confused