Wrong For Me

I want him to reach for me.

“I can’t imagine what it must have felt like for you to go through that on your own. To not only have nobody to share the news with but … to also have to think about …” He swallows, his eyes dropping to my abdomen. “About me off with someone else while our child grew inside you.”

I swallow my cry, and his eyes lift to mine, now rimmed red and swimming in tears.

“You were all alone for one of the most important moments of your life, and it’s all my fault. I can’t give that back to you. And for her to tell me before you could …” he whispers, and when he blinks, tears hit his cheeks. “I’m so sorry she stole your beautiful news.” He gets choked up, and my nose starts to tingle as I fight tears. “Another thing I can’t take back …”

It’s true, what he’s saying. I was alone, had no one to call and share this with, no one there to hold my hand while I waited and prayed that only one line would show. It should have been a happy moment where I cried happy tears, but instead, I cried in regret.

That’s a shame I’ll forever carry.

But I don’t wanna regret even more by pushing him away without even trying to take a step past this.

I swallow, afraid of the truth but ready to learn one small piece of it now.

“She told me something, too,” I utter, and his brows snap to the center. “But I’m afraid to know if it was a lie or not.”

“What do you want it to be?” he asks, the corners of his eyes crinkling.

My eyes well with tears. “I want it to be true.”

He mulls it over a moment before his face clears.

He rises to his knee, pushing off his foot to bring him to his full height, and I inhale, my head tilting back to keep our eyes locked.

“Ask me.”

When my lips smash together, a small sob escaping me, he shifts closer until his chest hits mine and my breath hitches. His hands come up then, the roughness of his skin scraping across mine, and my lids close, my eyes rolling back behind them.

God, I needed his touch.

“Oakley,” he whispers, his thumb grazing across my cheek, bringing goose bumps to my arms. “I can’t tell you I didn’t do things you’d hate because I did.”

My eyes peel open as pain wedges its way into my ribs, making it hard to breathe as I wait for more.

“But, baby … after you gave me you?” He brings his forehead to mine. “I refused to give her me.”

My hands lift, my forearms resting against his chest as I fist the cotton material in my palms, holding on with everything I have when I should probably want to push him back.

“I belong to you, baby. Only you. Every single part of me is yours if you’ll take it, and I’m standing here, begging you to.” He moves so his body is now flush against mine. “Forgive me when I don’t deserve it, love me even though I haven’t earned it, trust me when you have no reason to.” He tilts my head back farther, his palm cradling the back of my neck while the other slides across my cheek. He whispers, “Keep me, princess.”

“There’s still so much I don’t know.”

“We’re gonna fix that; I swear it. I’ll tell you everything.” He winces, his eyes drawing together. “But, princess …” he breathes, and my body shakes with silent cries. “Tell me you’re still mine.”

“Who said I ever was?” I whisper through tears.

He licks his lips. “Me. I do.”

My grip on his shirt tightens, and I pull him even closer, his lips almost brushing mine.

His eyes darken as he waits for my answer.

Despite everything, am I his?

Completely.

“Alec …” I whisper, and he inhales, his chest pushing against mine.

He can see it in my eyes, knows what I’ll say next, so his left hand slides across my back, pushing me into him, while his other digs into my hair.

But I don’t ask.

He told me before to be brave, to take what I wanted.

Well, I want him. And I can’t think of a better way to be brave than to fall with no net.

My chest heaves and my mind races with the unknown of today or tomorrow, but I shut it off.

I meet his mouth with mine. And he’s ready for me, his lips gliding over mine with such tender, thankful swipes. Tears build behind my eyes. Alec kisses me with his soul, stealing every ounce of mine.

His hand slides to my hip, his thumb sneaking beneath my shirt to rub my stomach, and I break away, dropping my forehead into his chest as I cry. He wraps his strong arms around me, holding me as close as possible. It only makes me cry harder.