I get the key and unlock the cuffs. Her wrists fall down onto the bed. I rub out the red marks around her slender wrists, and even though she can’t see me, I can’t help but bring my lips to the marks and kiss them. She sighs in her sleep, and her head drops to my shoulder, her hair still damp from the shower.
I inhale the scent of lavender.
It isn’t purple, she’d said, her brow furrowed in confusion. I smile at the memory, lift the blanket, and tuck it around her. I roll her over, tuck her against me, and spoon her from behind. I close my eyes, my arm draped over her. She won’t go anywhere tonight.
I wake early the next morning to her writhing and thrashing.
“Easy, Aisling.” She’s still tucked under my arm, but she’s trying to get out.
“Let me go!” She’s trying to lift my arm off her with difficulty. I tighten my grip.
“You’re not going anywhere.”
“Watch me!” She rolls over and shoves me so hard she almost budges me. I push up on my elbow, grab her wrists, and capture both of them in my right fist while I reach for the cuffs with the left.
“No!” she screams. “Not again. Leave me alone!”
“Only if you behave yourself.”
“I’ll behave!” she whines, and it’s almost pathetic how sad she looks. “Please. No more cuffs.”
I hold the cuffs and eye her warily. Her face is flushed red and dotted in perspiration. Her eyes are dilated, and her whole body trembles. I drape the blanket over her.
“Get some more sleep,” I order, my own voice husky from sleep. I’m goddamn exhausted. But I know before I say it that it’s no use. She couldn’t sleep now if she wanted to. The momentary reprieve has lifted, and she’s back to battling the withdrawal symptoms.
So I do what I have to. I help her in the shower, and I feed her breakfast. She doesn’t take kindly to being without what she wants so badly, but the food and showers and rest, and the small bits of respite Sebastian gives her, helps.
A part of me thought that I would hate this, that I’d resent this punishment Keenan gave me. But I almost like it.
Ever since I was a child, I looked after someone. Between my mom’s alcoholism and our poverty, there were many responsibilities I carried. I had to feed my younger siblings, keep them out of my mom’s way, make sure she didn’t lash out and hurt them. I had to fill their bellies and keep them safe, and I did it gratefully. Grateful I could have a hand in making sure they were safe.
A part of me likes knowing that soon she’ll be out of this personal hell.
I want the woman who emerges from this cocoon.
But she doesn’t make it easy.
“Eat your sandwich, Aisling, I tell her at lunchtime, pointing to the pressed panini and bowl of soup on her tray.
She’s dressed in a pair of joggers and a t-shirt. Her hair’s in a wild, messy bun that flops on top of her head, and she’s eying the food with trepidation.
“I’m not hungry.”
Sebastian said she wouldn’t have much of an appetite, but that doesn’t mean I’ll allow her to get away with not eating. She has to keep her strength up and food will help.
“You know the rule by now.”
She sighs. “Oh, aye,” she says with a frown. “Of course I do. Do what you tell me.”
I smile at her. “Fast learner.”
“Or what?” Her eyes are dancing a little today, and it excites me. She’s never given me a look like that before.
I shake my head. “You know exactly what will happen.”
She rolls her eyes and takes a tiny bite of her sandwich, when a knock sounds outside the bedroom.
I check the security feed on my phone.
Cormac.
I open the door and let him in, the door to my bedroom shut tight.
“Y’alright, Cormac?”
He nods. “Oh I’m alright. Question is, are you? You look bloody awful, mate.”
I shrug. “Doing fine. Should be another day or so before things…” I look at the door. “Ease up.”
He sits on the overstuffed chair in my living room. “How are you helping her through it?”
I shrug. “Showers. Feeding her. Making sure she doesn’t harm me or anyone else. Making sure she doesn’t escape.”
I take a long pull of tea from my mug.
“Have you tried sex?”
I sputter it everywhere, and he grins.
“Sex? For drug withdrawal?”
“Oh, aye,” Cormac says, stroking his thick beard. “Make the lass climax, take her brain off of everything for a little while. It’ll help...” He shrugs. “Honestly, both of you.” There’s a crash and howl from the other room.
I race to the door to yank it open, only to find it locked.
“Aisling! Let me in!”
“No!”
Cormac’s brows shoot heavenward. “This far in, and she’s still talking to you like that?”