Code Name - Rook (Jameson Force Security 6)
Page 68
When they start down the steps, again arm in arm, I make my move and walk their way. Jaime sees me coming from her peripheral vision. I can tell when her gaze lands on me that she’s not surprised to see me there.
“Can we talk?” I ask.
“It’s not a good time,” she replies, glancing at her parents, who are still walking toward the parking lot, oblivious I’ve stopped their daughter.
“It’s Christmas, Jaime,” I say softly, hoping to appeal to whatever joyful spirit she may have been filled with during, what I admit, was a beautiful experience watching the midnight Mass. “I’m just asking for a bit of time to talk.”
She nibbles on her lip in dismay, the fat flakes of snow covering her knit cap and standing bright against the fiery locks of hair that hang over her shoulders. She looks at Laney, then toward the parking lot, then back to Laney. “I need ten minutes.”
“Of course,” Laney says, then gives me a short glance. I’m surprised when she says, “Merry Christmas, Cage.”
I nod at her. “Merry Christmas.”
As Laney heads to her parents’ car, I take Jaime’s hand and lead her away from the church. It’s a beautiful setting, the church all lit up and casting a glow over us. It might be the type of moment a man uses to tell a woman he loves her or even proposes to her, but those moments are already lost to us.
She tugs her hand away from mine, crosses her arms over her chest, and waits for me to say something. “Jaime… I am so sorry I lied to you about my job. I am begging you to forgive me, so we can move on—”
“Hold up just a minute,” she says, her hand coming up and her gloved palm facing me. “It’s more than just lying about your job, Cage.”
“Yeah… I get that.” I hope my admission softens her a bit.
“Do you know what rook means?” she asks.
Frowning, I give it a shot. “It’s a chess piece, right?”
“It can be, but rook means to defraud or deceive someone. You rooked me, right after my brother did, and that came right after the last guy I was dating did, too. You might get that it’s about just a little bit more to me than just lying about a job.”
“I understand—”
“No, I don’t think you do,” she snaps, taking a step toward me but lowering her voice. It doesn’t diminish the power of her words, though. “It was far worse when you did it, Cage, because you actually swindled my heart.”
I wince because that’s a fucking slap of truth in the face. But still, I have to believe that what we have is enough to overcome this. “Jaime… I’m really sorry. I made poor choices. If you can forgive me, I know we can make this work between us. I know you’re angry—”
“I’m not angry anymore,” she says softly. For a moment, I have hope. But her eyes get shiny with tears, and her voice is morose. “I’m sad because you didn’t trust me enough with the truth. It was such a harmless lie, too, but the longer you let it go on, the bigger it got. And yet, you should have trusted in me and my feelings. You should have given me the benefit of the doubt that I would forgive the lie. But, you let it go on for weeks, and you led me right to the altar to get married without telling me the truth, and that’s not something I’m sure I can forgive.”
“You don’t think that’s a bit harsh?” I ask. Because while I understand and agree with everything she has said, shouldn’t we have enough love and care between us that forgiveness should at least be an option on the table?
“How do I trust you?” she asks. “I don’t even know you.”
“You can let me earn it back,” I suggest, and I know it’s a good option because that gives her pause. She looks back at the church, weighing that in her mind. In her moment of indecisiveness, I push a little more. “Do you still love me?”
Her head whips back toward me, red hair flying and scattering the snowflakes around her. “I love what I thought you were.”
“We’re talking about the difference between me being a car salesman and a security agent,” I point out.
It’s the wrong thing to say, and I realize it the moment the words are out of my mouth. She glares at me. “It’s the difference between being an honest man and being a liar.”
She’s not wrong about that. Again, I think she’s still more angry than hurt, and maybe time will lessen that pain for her.
I nod in understanding, bringing my hand up to wrap around the back of her neck as I step in close. “I get that. I’m hoping you’ll forgive me at some point. I am not giving up on us, Jaime.”