I have no clue how that even makes me feel.CHAPTER 12JoslynAfter I pull another armful of hangers with clothing attached from my closet, I throw it on my bed. Picking up the one on top, I examine it. It’s a silver Givenchy gown I’d worn to the Golden Globes five years ago, and I haven’t worn it since. It’s not proper in Hollywood to wear the same designer gown twice, so it just sits in my closet and collects dust.
With a quick critical eye, I determine it’s not something Bebe could utilize until she can buy some clothes of her own.
Not that I expected to find anything in here she’d appreciate. I’d already raided my drawers yesterday not long after we’d arrived at my house. I know Bebe had to be dying to get rid of that prison uniform, so I’d gathered a bunch of casual stuff—shorts, t-shirts, jeans, and sweatpants. I’d even had a bunch of brand-new lingerie I’d never worn, although my bra size is about two cups too big for Bebe, I’m sure she was thankful for the fresh panties. I set her up right away in one of the guest rooms that has its own master bath so she could shower the stink of captivity off and start fresh.
Tossing the Givenchy gown to the left of the pile, I pick up the next item. An Oscar de la Renta black crepe pantsuit I’d not even worn yet. It still had the price tag on it, but it also went into the pile on the left. I’d donate it somewhere, although I have no clue who would actually wear this stuff. Or maybe I can have Harry auction it off and give the proceeds to charity.
“Spring cleaning?” I hear from my bedroom doorway, and I whip around to find Rachel standing there. “Can I come in?”
“Sure,” I murmur, nabbing a flowery Gaultier above-the-knee dress I’d worn to some award luncheon. I’d managed to land a plum role in an indie film about a singer disillusioned with the business who gave it all up to start a new life in another country. Of course, she meets a handsome, mysterious man there and falls in love. The role hit close to home because I sometimes find myself so tired of everything that I wonder how bad it would be to walk away from it all.
I have to admit cutting out crazy stalkers from my life has great appeal.
Holding the dress up, I remember how great it looks on me. I love this freaking dress. I’d totally wear it again, be damned what the critics say. It starts a new pile to the right.
Rachel comes into my room, then plops down on the other side of my bed from the pile of clothing. She reclines on her side, propping her head in her hand and watching me.
I go through a few more outfits, all ending up in the auction pile. The silence isn’t awkward, but it’s not necessarily comfortable either. Just before I can start blabbering just to fill the void, Rachel says, “Lynn and Harry seem really nice.”
“They’re the best,” I agree, shooting her a brief smile.
“And I think Bebe is going to be a game changer for us.”
“Mmm, hmm.”
“We’ll have this asshole caught in no time,” she says cheerfully.
“Counting on it.” I put a Zac Posen skirt in the auction pile, but then reconsider, moving it to the small pile I’m keeping.
“Why did you slap Kynan?” Rachel asks, and my eyes snap to her in surprise. She merely smiles blandly. “I mean… I’m sure he deserved it because he wasn’t mad about it.”
My tongue feels glued to the top of my mouth. Being confronted about this out of the blue by a woman I don’t know much about has me at a loss.
“You don’t have to tell me,” she continues. “But I figure it might be good for you to have someone to talk to. Clearly, something is going on between you two.”
I deflate immediately, giving up the pretense I can just move on from what happened last night. I’ve not been able to think about anything else. How wonderful it was. How I felt such an intense connection with him.
How I’d—for the first time in as long as I can remember—felt hopeful about things.
Until he walked out of the room… and sent me crashing back down to earth with no soft landing in sight.
“He seduced me last night,” I confess as I slowly raise my head to meet her eyes. She doesn’t seem surprised. “I mean, came right into my room and started… well, he didn’t give me much of a warning or room to say no.”
“Be honest,” Rachel chides. “You didn’t want to say no.”
The corners of my mouth pull upward, and I shake my head. “No. I didn’t want to say no.”