“I am so sorry, Jos,” her mother says as she clasps her hands tightly in front of her chest. “I’m so sorry I hurt you. And Kynan.”
I blink in surprise as Madeline turns my way. “I’m sorry, Kynan. I can’t imagine how hard that was for you… to have Joslyn cut you off without any real explanation. And then to find out years later, she thought the worst about you for something you didn’t do.”
“I accept your apology, Madeline,” I say without reservation or further judgment. Frankly, I didn’t need her bloody apology. Doesn’t make me feel any different about things, but I want the attention off me. I want her to resolve these things with her daughter so we can move past this.
“What’s going on in here?” I hear a man’s voice coming from a doorway that leads into what looks like a large dining room.
I turn to see Darren Dawes. He’s a large, beefy man with snowy-white hair and a wind-weathered face. This is a guy who still clearly rides the range as he’s got on jeans, chaps, and a lamb’s wool jacket of a dark brown suede.
Madeline has tears slipping silently down her face, and Joslyn appears unsure of herself with Darren entering the conversation. I decide to do something rash and totally out of character for myself.
I step up to Madeline, then put my hand on her shoulder. “You and Joslyn need to talk. With your permission, I’d like to take Darren out for a beer. I’ll fill him in on what’s happened, and you and Joslyn can clear the air.”
Several different emotions flit through Madeline’s eyes as she stares back, but the most identifiable is gratitude. She gives me a nod with a watery smile before turning to her husband to introduce us. I’m able to get a brief glance at Joslyn.
She regards me with a gratefulness I hope signifies she might be willing to forgive me for last night.
“How about we just go into my study and have some bourbon?” Darren suggests.
“Works for me, mate,” I reply.
He moves to his wife to kiss her on the cheek, then whispers something in her ear. She puts her hand on his and pats it before turning to Joslyn with resolve on her face. I have a feeling that things are going to get aired out nicely between the women. If Madeline is smart, she’ll just let Joslyn rail a bit and get it out of her system.CHAPTER 14JoslynDarren gives me a long look of curiosity before he turns for his study. I attempt a smile, but it’s weak. I know he wants me to reassure him with one look that everything is okay, but he’s clearly walked into a situation that’s not. His loyalty will be to my mom, as it should be, and I’m glad Kynan has urged him away from this situation. My gaze drifts over to Kynan, and I hope my eyes convey my gratitude for doing that.
It’s moot, though. Kynan follows Darren out of the room without regard to me.
“I’m so very sorry, Joslyn.” My mom’s voice washes over me, and it’s quavering with emotion.
I take in a breath and let it out slowly. Turning to face her, I lay it all out on the line, because whatever she has to say about this will determine the course of our future as a mother and daughter. “I am not going to ask ‘why’ because there’s no mystery there. What I want to know is at what point in our relationship did I start meaning so little to you as a person and only had value to you as a means to fame and fortune?”
My mom jerks as if I’d struck her, and she shakes her head. “No, never. I never thought that. I did what I thought was best for you to push you forward to happiness. To me, the fame and fortune was your happiness. I’m not wrong about that, Joslyn. You wanted that, too, and I thought by removing the distraction I thought Kynan to be that you would appreciate it later.”
She’s not wrong about some of that. I did want the fame and fortune, but I wanted Kynan as well. “I could have had both with him.”
“I didn’t know that,” she replies sadly. “In fact, I doubted it. I was nineteen once. I know how at that age, you can get consumed by another person. You hardly knew Kynan and—”
“I loved him,” I interrupt her angrily. “He loved me. It was real.”
“Maybe,” she replies as she twists her hands. “But the chances of that being so weren’t very plausible to me. I was going with the probability what you two had was too new to really matter. I had even convinced myself since Kynan didn’t put up a big fight about it—that he just let you leave—that I’d done the right thing.”