Pull You In (Rivers Brothers 3)
Page 38
"No. It's not like that. She's... she's shy and quiet and no, she wouldn't do that."
"So, what is she guilty of, really?"
"She knew it was me. And I didn't know it was her. That's fucked up."
"Or, like you said, she was shy and quiet. And she was lonely. And she needed to reach out. And you were a safe, familiar person. But she was embarrassed for someone she knew in person to know how lonely and desperate she was."
"That's..."
"The more fair way of thinking about it?" Kingston supplied. "Yeah, I know. You were always one to rush to conclusions. To rush into everything. Mom named you well. It's fine when you're young and stupid and you can use young and stupid as an excuse. But you're not a kid anymore, Rush. You gotta think shit out before you react to it."
See?
Total dad-advice with him.
It was rarely what I wanted to hear.
But it was always what I needed to.
"Did you already confront her?" he asked, reading my reaction on my face. "Shit," he said, sighing.
"It wasn't wrong to be angry."
"Maybe not," he relented. "But what did you accomplish? Make a shy and insecure girl feel even worse about herself? Was that really the best move you could have made?"
No.
It wasn't.
And he was right.
I was getting to know Katie well enough to know she was not going to take this easy, take my anger well.
Fuck.
"Go home," King suggested. "Think it over. I'm sure Scotti can throw together a nice bouquet for you to give her as an apology."
I wanted to ask how he knew I was going to come to the conclusion that I needed to apologize. But we both knew that answer.
Because he'd raised me to admit when I was wrong, to try to make amends.
"She was wrong too," I insisted, just because I wasn't done fucking moping about it, apparently.
"Maybe," he agreed, nodding. "But that sounds like something you should be talking about with her, not me."
"Speaking of you," I said, looking around the office, seeing the pile of paperwork sitting next to him on the desk. "You need help around here?"
"For fuck's sake, Rush. Deal with your problems, don't run away from them."
"It's not that. Fee and I had a conversation earlier about how slow my line has been lately. It's been a good run, but I think it is coming to an end. Sooner or later. Just wanted to know if you needed help, or if I should be putting feelers out somewhere else."
"This stack," King said, putting his hand down on the pile at his side, "are all pending cases and clients. I'm drowning. You wanna dip your toes in, or dive, I can use all the help I can get. Just say when."
"I'll start working here on my days off," I offered. "Then we will go from there when Fee decides to close my part of the business down."
"Sounds good. Oh, but one more thing, Rush," he called as I turned to walk away, making me turn back.
"Yeah?"
"Don't use work to avoid your problems," he told me, giving me a knowing smile. "Oh, and did Fee call Mark yet?" he asked, making me let out a grumble.
"There is nothing to call Mark over," I insisted, feeling like a broken record.
"Sure, sure," King said, shrugging, reaching for his stack of folders as he looked at me. "I can't decide if I want to do the conservative or risky route," he mused. "Oh, who am I kidding, you've never taken your time on anything. On a rush to be born, to grow up, to get from here to there, I'm putting my money on weeks, not months."
"You're going to lose that money," I assured him.
"Yeah, you know," he said, lips curving up, "I don't think I will. Go home. I'll see you in a couple days."
With that, feeling a little better like I always did after having spoken to King, I left, making my way back to my apartment.
I liked having roots, but I hadn't put them down deep enough to buy a house. A part of me always knew that my tenure at Fee's business had a clock on it. For any number of reasons: the market and demand shifting, Fee changing direction to video which I already told her wasn't going to be my thing, or even if I eventually found a woman, wanted to settle down, save my dirty talk just for her.
And if you weren't sure about your career, you didn't do shit like take out a mortgage for thirty years.
If I went to work for King, though, it would become a possibility. Get a yard with a fence, have Savea find me some mangy mutt to play fetch with, eventually have a couple kids to play ball with, build clubhouses for.
It had taken a long time for me to start to consider things like a wife and kids. But after being around the Mallicks, and now my brothers as they started to settle down, it made me sure that was the future I wanted.