‘He has?’ She flashes me a curious look.
‘Yes.’ Darcy links arms with Alex and starts walking them to the shop. ‘We’ll have a girlie night. Me and you. How exciting!’
I stifle my laugh when Alex’s face morphs into something close to incredulity. I give her a look. Go with it, I mouth, and she rolls her eyes.
‘Exciting!’ she squeals, tossing the paper from her muffin in the bin. ‘Can’t wait.’
‘Me either, darling. Now we need supplies.’ Darcy swings around to me, bringing a staggering Alex with her. ‘Oh my, I just had the most terrific idea. Why doesn’t your father join us?’
My back slips against my truck, and I stagger a few paces to the right. What the actual fuck?
‘Yes!’ Alex sings. ‘That’s a terrific idea.’
It’s the worst idea I’ve ever heard. What’s going on? I rough up her absconding husband, show a bit of respect, and now I’m a part of the family? I don’t think so. ‘That’s kind of you, Darcy’ – weird of you, actually – ‘but makeup and dress-up isn’t really my thing.’ I motion down my front to my ripped jeans, battered shirt, and scuffed boots, as if she could have forgotten that I’m the barbarian she always claims I am.
‘Oh.’ Darcy titters all over the pavement, laughing hysterically. ‘I didn’t mean the girlie part. But you could join us for supper.’
What weird dimension am I in?
‘Come on, Dad,’ Alex pleads, coming forward with praying hands. Is she kidding me? I’m civil toward her mother, but my girl knows Darcy and I are so far apart on the human spectrum, I may as well be another species. Mixing us together for any longer than needed to exchange our daughter is a risk I’m not willing to take. Darcy’s malignant. I’m benign. She’s caustic. I’m mild. She’s conceited. I’m humble. I inhale, ready to deliver my resounding fuck no, but Alex’s pleading face sinks my intended refusal and I find myself saying, ‘Sure,’ before I can stop myself.
Alex’s grin isn’t smug or satisfied. It’s truly happy. God damn me, what have I done?
‘We’ll go home and prepare,’ Darcy says, thoroughly delighted. ‘We’ll cook your dad his favourite.’
I only just stop myself from pointing out that she has no idea what my favourite is. In fact, Darcy knows fuck-all about me. Except, of course, the size of my dick. And the fact I’m her daughter’s father, albeit proven in court. And obviously, that I live in a cabin – one that’s apparently as appealing as a mass grave.
‘You don’t know what dad’s favourite is.’ Alex speaks up where I won’t, pulling her excited mother to a stop at the door of the shop.
‘Well, you can tell me,’ she says.
‘Burgers,’ Alex declares proudly, and like I knew she would, Darcy recoils in revulsion, though she quickly composes herself. ‘Then we will make burgers.’
‘Great!’ Alex claps her hands, and I shake my head, utterly flabbergasted by what’s transpiring today. Darcy Hampton is cooking me dinner. The world really has gone mad. ‘We need to get beers, too,’ Alex declares. ‘And gherkins.’
I save Darcy the trauma of shopping for all the vile things she needs to make me burgers, heading for the back of my truck and pulling the tailgate down. ‘You may as well take this.’ I pull the bags out and make my way to Darcy’s car. ‘Everything you need is in here. Pop the boot.’
She does as I ask, probably for the first time in her life, and I dump the bags in the back. ‘I have a few things to do, so I’ll catch up with you soon.’
I look back to Hannah’s shop, feeling the disappointment starting to set in. I really wanted to see her tonight. Really wanted to. Instead of Chunky Monkey, beer, laughs, loose and carefree Hannah, and lots of amazing sex, I’ve got silver service, champagne in crystal glasses, false smiles, uptight and prissy Darcy Hampton, and no sex. Great.
I drop a kiss on Alex’s forehead before she gets in her mother’s car, reminding myself that this is for her and no one else. ‘Say hi to Hannah for me,’ she whispers.
‘I will.’
They drive off together, and I even get a cheerful honk of Darcy’s horn as she goes. Lord almighty, I’m not sure which Darcy is more insufferable.
I quickly shoot back into the shop, deciding I’d better show some hospitality and turn up at Darcy’s with some kind of offering, and snag a bottle of wine.
I feel my stomach tickle inside as I pay for it. Butterflies. It’s ridiculous yet . . . amazing.
I walk out of the shop with a certain urgency to my pace, my mind telling me that I can snatch half an hour with Hannah before I join Alex and Darcy, but I slow when I see Hannah outside. My smile is instant, and I find myself coming to a gradual stop and standing at a distance, just looking at her. Admiring her. Wondering, again, where on earth she came from. I don’t think I care. Somehow, she’s here. And somehow, I’m the lucky guy who found her.