“Yes.” I back toward the pool steps. “Ready?”
“Ready.” There was a deeper meaning to that one-word question, and Lainey caught it. Her attention flicks past me to the water, and I feel her tense a little in my arms. She takes a deep breath, quickly focusing on me again. “I feel like I can do anything if you’re with me.” She pushes her cheek into mine, nuzzling.
“You can.” I feel the water rising slowly up my legs as I take the steps. “I’m here. Focus on me.”
Her arms tighten around my shoulders, and her body stills in my hold when the water makes it to her legs, her thighs squeezing my waist. She turns her head and kisses me deeply, blanking my mind as I gently sink us under the water. Lainey’s body pushes closer to mine, and my head tilts back to maintain the tangle of our tongues. “Can you still stand?” she asks, breaking away and scanning our whereabouts in the water.
“Yes.” I put her mind at ease and find my feet, pushing us back out of the water. “See? You can stand, too.”
“I’m happy where I am.”
“Me too,” I agree, hugging her close as I submerge us again. Lainey’s face falls into my neck, her sigh deep and happy. And we just float in silence for a while, my head in chaos. Because this . . . this feels so fucking amazing.
“This feels amazing,” Lainey murmurs, and I smile as she peels her body from mine to look at me. Her blonde hair is soaked to her ears, the strands splaying around her shoulders. The small smudge of mascara under each of her eyes only highlights how blue they are, assisted by the water reflecting off them. “What’s going on up here?” She taps my temple gently.
“I don’t know,” I admit. “What’s going on up here?” I return her gesture, tapping her temple, too.
She nibbles on her bottom lip before hiding back in my neck. “I just keep thinking about work.”
I’m not deluded. She’s absolutely right to raise it as a concern, even if it’s not the whole reason she’s constantly fighting me. Dating the boss isn’t ideal and will most definitely raise a few brows at work. She’ll be judged. People will assume she’ll receive special treatment. And Sal will flip his bald head. This thing we have, the secrecy, the privacy, it’s necessary. I can’t deny that it’s amazing whenever we get to be together like this, both of us bursting with the need to lose ourselves in each other when we’re safe behind closed doors. The problem I’m facing now, though, is that I’m worrying less about the consequences and more about my ability to keep up the show. To hold myself back. But I must. For Lainey’s sake. We’ll figure it out somehow.
I tighten my hold. “Come on, let’s get you moving before I abandon the lesson and let you have me on the lounger.” I forsake my hold of her waist and take her arms from my shoulders, forcing them away.
“You swim. I ride,” she tells me, fighting my hold as she looks around the pool with worried eyes. “I like riding.”
“You can ride me soon,” I tease, turning her around until her back’s to my front and she’s facing the expanse of water before her. “On the lounger.”
She misses my suggestive quip completely, her fingers clawing my forearms where they lie across her tummy. Her feet are going like the clappers under the water, despite the fact that I have a tight hold on her and there’s no chance of me letting go. She knows that. “Stop kicking,” I say, placing my chin on her wet shoulder. “You can still touch the bottom.”
“I can’t,” she cries, trying to turn around to face me again. I increase my hold, keeping her where she is. “Tyler.”
“Calm down,” I order softly, being booted in the shin continuously.
“I don’t like it.” She breaks free, surprising me, and spins. “I don’t like it. All the water, I don’t like it.”
“Okay.” I let her throw her arms over my shoulders and crawl up my body, clinging tightly. Guilt consumes me as I feel her heart pounding, denting my chest. “I’m sorry. Too much too soon.”
She hides in my neck, her breathing erratic, and I kick myself for pushing her limits. That bastard of an ex has a lot to answer for. I make a silent promise that if I ever find out who he is, I’ll track him down and drown the fucker. I also promise that I’ll get her past this if it’s the last thing I do. “I’ve got you,” I soothe her, finding my feet and standing. “Look.”
Lainey frees herself from the sanctuary of my neck and glances around. “You can drown in shallow water too, you know.”