“How about instead of that, I take you to dinner Tuesday after you win?” he says.
“Don’t —”
“Jinx it, I know, can I take you to dinner or what? Here. In town.”
My heart feels like a bellows.
“What if I don’t win because you jinxed it?” I ask.
“Then I’ll take you out to get your mind off it,” he says.
“What if Martin wins?”
Eli makes a face.
“If Martin wins I say we get sloppy drunk and make out at the bar until they have to call someone to come pick us up,” he says, and I laugh.
“Okay,” I finally say. “Dinner if someone good wins, shots if Martin wins.”
“Exactly.”
My hand is still in his, and he absentmindedly taps my knuckles with his fingers in that restless way he always has, and I watch him. I already can’t remember what I was so nervous about, but that’s the way it always goes.
“Eli,” I say.
He stops tapping for a second, his eyes flicking to mine.
“Violet.
“I like you,” I say.
There’s more to it than that. There’s desire and lust, obviously, and there’s everything that’s between us. But there’s also these quiet moments. There’s also him showing me the constellations on his roof or holding me in the car while I told him about my mom. There’s making pancakes for breakfast and bringing pies to his family dinner.
“I like you, too,” he whispers back, his eyes crinkling with a smile as he brings my hand to his lips and kisses it. “A lot.”Chapter Thirty-NineVioletTuesday morning, I wake up at five a.m., like I’m a kid on Christmas. After thirty minutes of trying to go back to sleep I give up, get out of my bed quietly, toss on my robe, head into my kitchen, and make some coffee.
Two hours later, Eli wanders in, pillow lines on his face, hair mussed and wild, in nothing but his boxers.
It’s a very good morning sight.
He gives me a suspicious look, then shakes his head and pours himself some coffee.
“You’re that excited for this meeting?” he says, sleep still weighing down his voice.
“I just couldn’t sleep,” I say, pushing aside the book I was reading.
“You do know there are other employees at Bramblebush who do good work,” he teases. “Like me, for example. I did okay this summer.”
“I didn’t say I couldn’t sleep because I think I’m going to win,” I say, truthfully. “I just said I couldn’t sleep.”
If I really thought I were going to win I’d have slept like a baby. I hate to admit it, but it’s the thought of not winning that’s kept me up.
I don’t like losing. I really, really don’t like it.
“Mhm,” he says, lifting the coffee to his lips. “I’m sure that hasn’t crossed your mind at all.”
I just roll my eyes.
“Just remember us little guys when you win,” he says. “Name some of us in your acceptance speech.”
He leans against my counter, sipping. I take a minute to ogle, because I can.
“Are you suggesting I name you?” I ask. “And to Eli Loveless, thanks for keeping my bed warm?”
“I did better than that,” he teases, grinning. “A heating pad could keep your bed warm. Besides, I do have professional accomplishments. Several, in fact.”
“You gonna thank me in your speech?”
“Does the winner really have to give a speech?”
“I didn’t last year or the year before,” I admit. “It would be weird.”
“Good,” he says. “I hate giving speeches.”
“You’d love doing it if you won,” I say. “Don’t lie, Eli, I know you too well for that.”
He laughs.
“Maybe,” he admits. “Mostly, I’d want to revel for as long as I could in the fact that I beat you at something.”
I lean my head against my hand.
“Still, Eli?” I say lightly. “Even now?”
He drinks the last of his coffee, puts the mug in my sink, and crosses the kitchen toward me.
“Especially now,” he says, and kisses me on top of the head. “I’m gonna take a shower. Leave without me if you want, I’ve got my key.”* * *I don’t see Eli again until the all-staff meeting starts, and then it’s from across the room. I stand around, having my fourth cup of coffee, trying to make idle chatter with Lydia and Kevin when he walks in.
He saunters straight over to us. My heart flutters and I brace myself, all at once, remembering our conversation from last night. We’re real now. I’m fully prepared to admit to the world that Eli Loveless is my boyfriend.
But I don’t think I can kiss him in front of my coworkers. That’s just weird, right? Weird and wildly unprofessional? And against several workplace guidelines?
Eli just nods at me, like he can read my mind. Maybe he can by now, who knows.
“How’s your head?” he asks Kevin.
“It’s been better,” my poor intern says. “Montgomery did chew us out pretty good.”
Lydia makes a face.