Payback's A Bitch (Awkward Love 6)

“I'm sorry I haven't been around much lately,” I say quietly. “You’re right. As far as brother’s go, I suck pretty hard.”

There are so many innuendo’s he could make to that comment, but he doesn’t. That right there is my first clue that something is bothering him.

“Mack?” I prompt.

He shrugs. “It’s nothing.”

“Is it the wedding?” I ask. “Because I’m having the same trouble with trying to get my head around it,” I admit.

He sits forward on his board and paddles his feet in the water, staring down into it. Then he looks up and offers me a half-hearted smile.

“Sometimes I feel like everyone’s forgotten me.” He looks over at me and smiles. “I get it,” he says. “You work and have your life. It’s cool, Cam. I don’t expect you to drop everything for me, but sometimes I feel like I fall between the cracks.”

“With your mouth, you’re pretty unforgettable,” I say, only half joking.

It’s the most serious thing I’ve ever heard my brother say and it scares the fuck out of me.

He smiles at me. “I like having Paula around,” he admits. “She's cool and she keeps Dad off my back. And Darcy’s fun to have around too.”

“Because of all the shit you give Darcy, you mean,” I chuckle.

“Oh, come on. I’m just messing around with her. I act out around her because it gets a reaction. I can still think she’s a cool chick. She seems to really not like you much though,” he adds with a grin.

“You noticed that too, huh?” I smirk at him.

“Bit hard not to,” he grins. “I guess I don’t blame her. You are a bit of a dick.”

“Hey,” I grumble.

I reach over to punch him on the arm, but I lose my balance and fall into the water. He's laughing when I resurface.

“That's what you get for trying to be a fuckwit,” he guffaws.

He looks out at the waves and then paddles furiously toward them. He stands up and starts riding the waves. I watch him for a moment, because he’s pretty good. If he put his mind to it, he could be great. I used to be great. Enough that I was scouted by sponsors and shit, but after Mom died…well, when that happened, I stopped doing much of anything.

I paddle out and attempt to ride the next lot of waves but once again I end up face down in the water, with my board on top of me.

“Don’t give up your day job, you weak pussy,” Mack hollers.

I chuckle, pick up my board and walk onto the sand. A passing couple give me a concerned look. I shrug at them.

“He’s older than he looks.”

I sit down on the sand and reach for my phone. I smile when I see a text waiting for me from Darcy. I actually look forward to her messages, and not just because she’s buying into my joke, but because I like hearing what she has to say. I like the witty comebacks and the fact that she handles most things with a smile.

Does she really not like me?

Because she seems to be enjoying James.

Everything I say to her is true. I’m not making up some bullshit story, I’m just being myself. Even the name James isn’t something I pulled out of nowhere. It’s my middle name. Whether she believes that when she finds out it’s me, that’s another story. I shake my head. Huh. Maybe I’m starting to like her.

No.

It’s just because I’m staying there and around her so much…isn’t it? I shake off the thought as I grab my phone and click on her latest message.

Darcy: I have a very serious question to ask you. This…or that.

Me: Excuse me?

Darcy: You know. This or that. Which would you rather? Drink a glass of your own jizz, or a glass of someone else’s urine?

I laugh. Is she fucking kidding me? They’re my choices? I make a face. I don’t even want to answer, just in case this turns into some kind of creepy proposition.

Me: Is neither an option?

Darcy: No. Stop being such a pussy and pick one.

Me: Fine. The second option. Your turn. Sand or lemon juice in your vagina?

I toss the phone on the towel next to me and I look out at Mack, who’s still in the water. I shiver as I watch him, suddenly feeling empty. I find it so hard sometimes, but what I forget is that this has to be even harder on him.

We both lost Mom, sometimes I forget it wasn’t just me.

It's been two years since she died, following a short battle with cancer. I think about her a lot, probably more than I even realize. She sneaks into so many thoughts, sometimes even really random ones. I’ll be doing something as simple as watching a show, and something will remind me of her. I miss her. A lot. And I know Mack does too.