“Thanks for coming,” I say.
I force myself to smile as I nervously rake my hand through my hair. Then I step back to let her in. She doesn’t move. She just stands there in shock, gaping at me, like she’s frozen to the spot. I give an anxious laugh, which startles her enough that her gaze shifts over me again.
“Do you want to come in?” I ask her. “Because I’d rather not have this conversation in full view of all my neighbors,” I add.
Specifically, Lewis.
I give her an uneasy smile and motion for her to come in. This time she does. I close the door behind her and take a deep breath. I can’t think about what I’m doing, because one slip up, one second where I break out of character, and the whole game is up.
She turns around and frowns at me.
“Is that…is that my mother’s dress?” she asks uncertainly, her lips pressed tightly together.
“Yes,” I murmur. “This is what I wanted to speak to you about. I figured it was easier to show you…”
I smooth my hand over my purple silk dress and then nod. I can’t actually tell if she’s trying not to laugh or if she’s really concerned about me.
“I didn’t mean to take it,” I say to her. “I went over there to see Mack, but he wasn’t home. Then I saw the dress sitting there. It was draped over a chair, and at first all I wanted to do was feel the material.” I pause and look down, then I let out a nervous laugh. “It was so soft. All I could think about was much I wanted to try it on. It was calling my name.”
I raise my eyes to meet hers, then I lower them again.
“Cameron…Cameron….” I whisper the words, sounding both full of regret and shame.
Darcy shakes her head. “I don’t know what to say,” she admits.
She laughs nervously, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. I nod, like I completely understand.
“And you have to know,” I say. “That’s why I asked you to come over, because I had no idea how to put it into words, either. I didn’t know how to tell you. This in a way that you’d take me seriously, by seeing it. Me.”
I hold her gaze, just to show her I’m serious, then I take a deep breath and laugh. I want her to believe that I’m struggling with this, like it’s one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. The funny thing is that this is one of the hardest things I’ve done, but not for the same reasons I want her to think.
“Cam, I’m not going to judge you,” she promises me. “Just be honest and tell me what’s going on.”
I nod and sit down on the couch, clasping my hands together in front of me. I look up and meet her eyes. She sits down next to me.
“Mack told me your whole obsession thing was just to get back at me,” I say.
At least that’s something I’m being truthful about.
“But what you don’t know is the reason I responded to your ad in the first place.” I take a deep breath before I continue. “It wasn’t because I wanted to play stupid mind games with you.”
“It wasn’t?” she asks.
“No.” I pause. “The night we were supposed to meet? I was going to tell you everything,” I say. I take another deep breath, then I laugh.
Fuck I hope she’s buying this.
“I have these urges. These desires that I just can’t shut up.”
“You mean the dressing in women’s clothing?” she asks softly. She shakes her head and smiles at me. “But that’s not even a big deal, not in this day and age—”
“The crossdressing is just the beginning,” I explain. I laugh and rub my forehead. “Hey, can we sit down and talk about this properly?” I ask.
“Sure, of course we can,” she assures me.
I lock the door, then show her through to the living room. The last thing I need is for someone to walk in. Like Lewis. Or my father.
If he saw me like this, I’d never hear the end of it.Chapter TwelveDarcy“So?”
I wink at Mack and hand him his fifty-dollar bill. He studies it for a moment, like he’s checking its authenticity, then he laughs as he shoves it in his pocket.
“Easiest cash I ever made,” he grins.
“It’s probably the only cash you’ve ever made,” I joke. “But good work.”
“Nah, it was your idea,” he grins. “So, what next?”
I shrug and lift my lips into a very satisfied smirk.
“Now I do everything I can to make sure poor Cameron is finally able to acknowledge all those urges and desires he’s spent years suppressing.”
Mack laughs. “This is great. I need photos. Please.”
“No,” I chastise him. “This isn’t a joke. I’m teaching your brother a lesson.”