Damn you, Chase, for getting inside my head.
When the class finishes, I take my time rolling up my mat, because I’ve decided that tonight is the night I make my move. After what happened with Chase, and my muddled feelings over him, I’m even more determined to do this.
I just want something to go right for once.
I want one night where I don’t feel like a worthless idiot. I’m not usually the kind of girl who does one-night stands—or self-pity, for that matter—but tonight I’m willing to do whatever it takes to get Chase off my mind.
I wait until we’re alone in the room before I slowly walk toward the exit. Just as I hoped, Jake jogs over to me, blocking me at the door. My heart races, because this is the biggest sign he’s given me that my attraction isn’t one-sided. That alone boosts my confidence.
“Hey.” He grins.
“Hey,” I say, trying to sound relaxed. After nearly an hour of yoga, I should be.
“You did great tonight,” he comments. “I’m really noticing a difference in the way you flex.”
“Thanks,” I say shyly, refusing to acknowledge that his voice doesn’t have me swooning like it normally would.
“So, what are you doing now?” he asks me.
I shrug. It's Friday night, and like the sad person I am, I have no plans other than to go home and watch TV in my pajamas, but I don't want him to know that.
“Nothing I can't change for the right offer,” I say lightly. I’m impressed with how smooth I sound. I’m sure that has everything to do with my interest in him taking a nosedive. “Did you have something in mind?”
“I thought maybe we could go and get a drink later, or something?”
He smiles and leans a little closer to me. I swallow a shiver racing through me. Not because I like it, but because I’m feeling a little claustrophobic.
“Sure,” I say. “What time?”
He glances at his phone. “I’ve got classes until ten, so any time after that?”
“That sounds great.” I nod.
“Okay, great.” He smiles. “There’s a bar near my place, on the corner of Fifth and Seventh. Is eleven too late?”
“Not at all,” I say, even though I’m nearly always fast asleep by then. The only thing that is worrying me is that gives me five hours to chicken out. “Eleven is perfect.”
“Okay. I’ll see you then.” He glances at me. “I’m looking forward to it, Alana.”It’s only once I’m outside the gym that the panic really begins to kick in. Whether I’m into him or not, the fact is, I haven’t been on a date in months. I’m so out of practice that it will be a miracle if I can get through this without making a complete fool of myself. Considering I can’t even get through a day at work without looking like an idiot, I highly doubt this is going to go smoothly.
And just like that, I’m back to thinking about Chase.
God, I wish it were him I was going out with.
My eyes widen. Do I really think that?
I frantically call Peyton, because she’s the only one who can help me through this. Or maybe out of it. I’m not sure which yet.
“I have a date tonight and nothing to wear,” I groan. “At eleven. Who the hell goes out that late? I’m so stupid, Pey. What the hell was I thinking, saying yes?”
“People who want to hook-up go out that late.” Peyton giggles. “What are you, sixty? Who the hell goes out before eleven, Alana? But yay for you. This is the first step in your journey to getting yourself thoroughly fucked. So, who’s the lucky guy? Hot instructor?”
“Who else would it be?” I mumble. Sex? God, I hadn’t even factored that into my anxieties until now.
“Damn. I was kind of hoping for Chase,” she admits.
So was I. I frown at myself. Jesus, Alana, snap out of it.
“I’ve only spent one day with him because making a fool out of myself in front of him doesn’t count. Why would I be going out with him?” I say, as much to myself than her. “Actually, don’t even answer that. He is the last person I want to be thinking about right now.” I groan and rub my head, feeling a migraine coming on. Isn’t yoga supposed to decrease my stress levels? This is such a bad idea.
“Stop that,” Peyton says as if she can hear my thoughts. Or did I say that out loud? “Where are you meeting him?”
“Near work,” I mutter hoarsely. I hunch forward, feeling sick at the thought of going through with this.
“Okay. Then come over here,” she says in a no no-nonsense voice. “You’ll wait with me. I’ve got the perfect dress you can wear. I even have some stunning new lingerie you can have. I only bought it yesterday. We can have a drink, get you nice and relaxed. We can even go over some ideas for small talk if it’ll make you feel better.” She pauses for a second. “Hell, we can make out if you need practice, but I draw the line at giving you head.” She pauses again. “But I’m willing to consider letting you give me head.”