Our Love Story

I understand that, without even knowing all the details, I understand Ethan when I look into his eyes.

“Sorry for freaking the fuck out the other night,” he says. “Do you forgive me?”

I nod, too scared to speak, because for some reason that I don’t understand, at this moment I’m finding myself on the verge of tears.

On the verge of becoming more attached than I should be to a man I hardly know.

“You’re too good to me,” he whispers, his thumb pressing against my lips. I bite it instinctively. Lying next to him turns me into a darker version of myself, a version I always try to bury.

The part he must be able to see.

“I don’t trust myself with you,” he says. His words are not the ones I expected to hear.

“What do you mean?” I ask, finding my voice, my hips moving, aching to be closer to him. He must sense it because he inches closer to me too.

“I feel like if I was with you, completely naked, I would do crazy things to you, Chloe. The things I want to do to you are too filthy for someone as pure as you are.”

My breath catches. I didn’t expect this from Ethan. I remember our kiss, I remember his long cock, but he’s also been reserved and distant and solemn and respectable.

The words on his lips though, they promise dirtier ideas than I thought he was capable of.

“Maybe I want you to do filthy things to me, Ethan. Maybe I want to see how far you can push us both.”

He groans, pulling away from me. “We made a deal with the guys. I’m not going back on my word and I know you don’t want to either. That’s why I needed to come here and tell you...”

“Tell me what?” I ask. I’m so wet already and my hands run up his chest looking for the hem of the shirt because I need to slide my fingers over him and feel his ladder of muscles, I need to reach under the waistband of his sweats and feel his hard, desperate cock.

I close my eyes imagining the filthy ways he is thinking about our first time.

How dirty is Ethan? Is he imagining blindfolds and whips? Tying me to a bedpost and spanking me like I am a dirty girl? I can imagine him taking out his pain and turning it into something pleasurable.

I can imagine myself doing the same.

It’s crazy because both of us are virgins. But there is also something inside the two of us. Something that is broken that we both intrinsically understand.

I want to understand him more.

“I’m not taking you out today,” he tells me, sending a cold chill down my spine. It is the exact opposite of what I want. “I can’t be alone with you, Chloe.”

“But I trust you, Ethan.” I feel the rise and fall of his chest, his heart beating fast. I feel the tip of his cock pushing out of his sweatpants. I feel him roll to his back, his eyes on the ceiling. Pulling away from me.

“Chloe, you are not the problem. The problem is that I don’t trust myself.”

I feel tears in my eyes, a single drop rolling down my cheek.

Then, with urgency, he rolls back to face me, and he kisses me.

Hard.

So, hard I hear myself whimper, I hear a groan escape his lips.

There is an intensity there, when our mouths meet that I’ve never felt before, and I can only imagine the intensity we would feel if we gave one another all we had to give.

He wipes away my tear and kisses my eyelids, my nose. My cheeks. My forehead. Then he pulls away as quickly as he came.

“Don’t make me wait too long,” I tell him.

“I won’t. I promise.” And then Ethan slips back into the dark hallway.

My breath catches.

A sob escapes, I want too much. I want everything and I want it now.

I want all of these men. In my bed, with me, holding me each night.

I need Mason to take care of me in ways I don’t know how to take care of myself and Enzo showering me with affection I’ve never been able to accept before and Noah making me laugh until my sides hurt and Ethan witnessing my pain and helping relieve a fraction of it at a time.

I close my eyes, imagining them with me.

In me.

My pussy throbs. My need insistent.

I pull down my shorts and I drop my knees, circling my clit as I think about Ethan’s hot breath, his hard cock, his dark words. As I think about all of them, about how safe they make me feel.

About how the idea of leaving them terrifies me.

I want them all to myself, and I want them soon.

I come all over my fingers not holding back when I groan in a dramatic release.