I finally find my composition notebook I use from time to time when I need to make a to-do list and take it and my laptop into the living room. I sit cross-legged on the floor, setting everything on the coffee table.
“This is what the sigil looked like,” I tell my familiars as I draw it. “I think.” I tip my head and look at the paper. “It was kind of messy since I drew it in blood.” I set the pen down and open my computer. “So now I just need to search for Michael’s symbol and see if I can find something that looks like this. I know I can’t trust what I find online,” I go on, rambling as I search for archangel symbols.
I get a lot of hits and find several sites that have Michael’s sigil exactly the same as I drew it. I print off pages and jot down notes, but I don’t get any closer to figuring out how to summon an angel, which I suppose is a good thing. Having that sort of information on the internet could be dangerous, though it’s not like most people who’d access this info would actually be able to pull it off.
“Michael might be too powerful to start with,” I say, though I don’t need to actually summon him here. If I can somehow communicate with him, I’m sure he’ll come.
He has to.
He’s my father, and I really do believe that he loves me and cares about me. He risked everything to keep me alive and risked it all over again to come back and save me when I was dying from a demon virus.
He’s staying away to keep me safe, no matter what Lucifer says.
Though…I honestly believe Lucifer cares about me, too, which is fucking insane, I know. I can’t explain it…it’s just a feeling I have.
“Trusting the devil is worse than trusting a vampire,” I muse, laughing at myself as I draw another sigil in my notebook. I go back to my Google search, skimming through the results.
“This might be something,” I say as Binx steps into my lap, purring. “There was a book written in the thirteenth century that was partially translated into English in the eighteen-hundreds.” I scroll down on the article, impatiently tapping my fingers against my keyboard as the page slowly loads. “You can buy versions of the translation on Amazon, though I’m sure it’s missing vital information.” I skim the article so fast I have to go back and start over.
“Okay,” I say, talking to my familiars. “The original is in a museum in France. Not everything was able to be translated, and I’m guessing it’s because it’s in Enochian, which isn’t a problem for me.”
I straighten up, realizing how terrible my posture is from my stiff muscles. “Lucas has a house in France I haven’t yet seen,” I start as an idea forms in my head. “And it wouldn’t be stealing if I borrow the book for an hour or so. I just want to read it and then I’ll give it back.”
It’s a long shot, and this book could be full of useless information in regards to summoning an angel. But, dammit, I want to talk to my father so fucking much.
I have so many questions.
About me.
About my mother.
About my angelic side.
And if I’m being stupid by giving dear old Uncle Lucy the slightest bit of my trust. Though he is the only one willingly talking to me. He’s helped me, and I’m sure if I were to lie down, close my eyes, and drift to sleep, he’d talk to me again right now. I could ask him about summoning angels, and if he knew a way, I’m sure he’d tell me.
“Stop it,” I snap and close my computer. I’m not talking to Lucifer again. I can’t trust him. He already alluded to wanting me to help free him from the depths of hell. He was put there for a reason, and I need to remind myself of that.
Letting out a breath, I run my hands over my face and get up, going upstairs to change into workout clothes. I throw my hair into a messy ponytail as I come down the stairs and root around in the junk drawer in the kitchen for my headphones.
And then I set off, jogging down the road. It’s early, and the air is still holding onto the chill of night, making me wish I’d worn gloves. I’ll warm up soon enough, and two miles in, I’m sweating.
I do ten minutes of yoga when I get home to stretch, and it hits me that I’m only in as good of shape as I am because I’m half angel. I do work out and go through phases where I eat mostly healthy food.
Though I don’t remember the last time I went through one of those phases. Should I get back to it? Does it matter? My human half can still fall prey to high cholesterol, right?