I cock an eyebrow. “Why wouldn’t I be?”
“Because you just found out you are carrying a child.”
“That’s even more of a reason to put an end to that bitch. It’s one less thing to worry about, and then we can talk names and what color to paint the nursery and where the nursery will even be.” I plant my hands on the couch and push myself up. “So let’s go. Get this handled.”
“Callie,” Julian says slowly. “You are the first nephilim to ever conceive a child. I…I have no idea what this means.”
My blood turns cold, and something Michael said rings in my ears. My mother didn’t survive childbirth. Carrying a divine child nearly killed her, and she only hung on because she loved me and wanted me to be born.
She was fully human. I’m not. And my baby won’t have as much divinity in its veins as I do. Surely, I’ll survive. Well, assuming the other angels don’t find me first.
And now another lump is rising in my throat. I wasn’t supposed to be born. I’m an abomination in the eyes of other celestials…will they view my child the same way?
I blink back tears and look at Julian, who gives me a reassuring nod.
“I will stay and protect you both,” he says, as if he can read my thoughts. “It’s what your father would want, especially now. He would…would…I have no idea, actually.”
I put my head in my hands and lean forward, waiting for the twist of nausea to go away.
“What did you find out about tracking Ruth?” I ask, taking a deep breath and pushing off the couch. “Can we go get her now?”
“Callie,” Lucas says gently. “I think you should take the rest of the day off.”
“I can’t,” I say, voice thinning.
“Yes, you can.” He takes my hands in his. “To say everything that happened in the last two days is overwhelming is an understatement.”
I can’t disagree, and the last few hours has been a huge info overload. Someone in the VC wants to set Lucas up. Demons want me to overthrow Hell. And I’m pregnant.
“You’re right,” I sigh.
Lucas pulls me into an embrace, strong arms never faltering. “Take the rest of the day off. Rest and let’s process everything,” he says, and it hits me that he needs a break, too. I’m pregnant with his child.
It’s the literal last thing he would ever think could happen. He’s been dead for over a thousand years and is going to be a dad in nine short months. Our lives will forever change, and deep down, I know we need to process this all together.
I’d rather fight demons or homicidal necromancers. I know how to do that, at least. But be a responsible adult, let alone a mother…fucking terrifying.
“Okay,” I say and tip my face up to look into Lucas’s beautiful blue eyes. He’ll do whatever he can to make me happy. To calm my nerves. Make me feel safe.
And I want to do the same for him because I know he’s scared, too. There’s a good chance he’s going to have to watch me age and die. Losing me and then our child…I don’t think even Lucas could survive that.Chapter 36“Do you want anything else?” Lucas asks, setting a bowl of pasta salad on the coffee table. Staying true to taking the rest of the day off, I’m sitting in the living room watching TV. Julian is in here with me and has been rather intrigued by the home renovation show I have on.
“Just you,” I tell Lucas and hold out my hand, reaching for him. I tug him to me as soon as our fingers interlace, and he settles on the couch with me. We snuggle up together, and I dig into my pasta, which I’m ridiculously excited to eat.
“This is really good,” I say after I shovel a spoonful into my mouth. “Thank you for making it.”
“Anything for you, my love.” Lucas kisses my forehead and adjusts the blanket over my lap. He’s been spoiling me even more than normal, and I know this is going to go on the entire pregnancy.
And I’m starting to think I’m okay with that.
“According to this,” Lucas starts, looking at a pregnancy tracker app he just downloaded on his phone, “you’re about five and half weeks along, and it’s rather early for you to start having symptoms already.”
“It’s probably because she’s not fully human,” Julian says, turning away from the TV. “I wouldn’t be surprised if you feel more human than ever in the upcoming months. Your body has never dealt with that much humanity before.”
“Great,” I huff. “Though it makes sense.” I take another bite of pasta and set the bowl down, trading it for Lucas’s phone. “The baby is about the size of an apple seed and already is making me feel like shit. It’s only going to get worse, isn’t it?”