Knox (Chicago Blaze 4)

Part of me wants to tell Reese about his illness, but I’m not sure I can bring myself to say the words “he’s dying” out loud. I still have an irrational hope that the doctors are wrong.

It fucking sucks that while one area of my life is going so well, another is in the shitter. The happy times I’m having with Reese are keeping me from giving in to the despair I feel over my dad.

“What did you buy?” Reese asks me once we’ve finished dinner and watched a video presentation about the shelter and its work.

I lean in and tell her. “I made a direct donation and bought a weekend trip to Napa. Since it’s for a good cause, I know you’ll go on the trip with me.”

She nudges me playfully. “Yes, I’ll go. You never have to ask twice if it’s California.”

“I don’t drink wine, though, so we’ll have to find other ways to pass the time.”

She’s about to respond when Mia Petrov comes to the podium and tells the crowd she’s got a tentative total to announce from the fundraiser. My heart pounds as Reese clutches my hand beneath the table, her other hand wrapped up in both hands of Angelia, who’s sitting on her other side.

“This number is not final, because we still have some stuff to add in,” Mia says, looking down at a piece of paper. “But we know we raised at least this amount.”

Reese is holding her breath in anticipation, not moving, and I find myself doing the same. I want this event to go well, and not just because I want to take her out on a date. It’s for a great cause, but more than anything, I want to make Reese happy. I want her to be able to continue her work at the shelter, because I’m not sure if she even realizes this, but that work has helped her heal.

I’m hoping for any number higher than two hundred thousand dollars, but I’m floored when I hear Mia’s announcement.Chapter SixteenReeseMy mouth drops open in shock and I turn to Knox.

“Did she just say $416,000?” I ask.

“She did.”

The whole room is cheering, and the employees from the shelter sitting at our table are crying with happiness. The programs are saved. It’s a sense of victory I’ve never even imagined feeling.

And it’s all because of Knox’s idea for this fundraiser. I lean over, take his face in my hands and kiss him, on the verge of crying myself. I’ve never in my life been so overwhelmed with gratitude and love.

Love? I pull back from Knox, feeling like someone just knocked the wind out of me. How can I be in love with Knox? I promised myself I’d never fall in love again, and I’ve turned down every offer of a relationship from him.

And yet…it’s there. Down deep in a part of my heart I thought no one would reach again…is Knox Deveraux. He’s not like any man I’ve ever known. Steady and sexy at the exact same time. Able to knock me off my feet and keep me grounded.

I want to tell him, so we can process this shock together, but I clamp my lips shut. I can’t do that. Because if he loves me back—and I think he does—there’ll be nothing holding us back from a full-blown relationship. In no time, my clothes will be on his bedroom floor and he’ll have a blue toothbrush in the cup on my bathroom sink next to my purple one.

Just the thought makes me a little dizzy. While I’d love every minute of being with Knox like that, there’s still a voice in the back of my mind reminding me of that day almost a year and a half ago when Eric drop-kicked my heart across a small chapel.

I thought everything was well and good. I was about to spend the rest of my life with a man who had cheated on me more than once. I realize now it was probably more than twice, too. But I didn’t have a clue.

Knox is happy now, but will he be in five years? Could I ever walk down the aisle, see any man standing there and not wonder what he hasn’t told me?

“Hey, you okay?” he asks me, his brows knitted together with concern.

I grab my goblet of water and take a long drink, nodding as I set it down. “I just felt lightheaded there for a minute. I think I’m just in shock.”

Angelia turns to me, smiling wider than I’ve ever seen her smile. She hugs me and then reaches across my lap and takes Knox’s hand, squeezing it.

“Thank you,” she says, her voice breaking.

“It was my pleasure,” he says.

And damned if I don’t want to kiss him again. Knox has always had a way of making me lose my senses that I’ve never experienced with any other man.