I was in the middle of The Grove, casually strolling with a gelato in hand. It had been a pretty relaxing day. My father was out of the office, and I’d left early to buy a few things after work. The sun was setting. It was one of the rare times I was just chilling by myself.
Figures.
My heart dropped. There she was, hand-in-hand with him as they gazed into the storefront window at Barney’s.
My first inclination was to run in the opposite direction, but a part of me knew taking advantage of the opportunity fate had put right in front of me was the better option. This wasn’t going to be any easier three months down the line. I needed to get it over with so the unknown wouldn’t matter anymore. This was the last step to moving on, as far as I was concerned.
Mallory looked good. She had her long, black hair tied up in a ponytail and was wearing white capris and a fitted tank top. My eyes trailed down to the guy’s hand on her ass. It made me uncomfortable but didn’t upset me the way I thought it might.
I’d seen a photo of this guy, Aaron, before because my friend Benny, the ever-helpful bearer of good news, had screenshot it off of Facebook. I was secretly pleased to see that while he was a good-looking dude, he was much shorter than me in person.
I forced myself to walk right up to them and said, “Hey.” It came out almost too enthusiastically.
Mallory flinched, realizing it was me standing before her. “Hi.” She swallowed, looking extremely uncomfortable.
I immediately turned to the guy. “You must be Aaron.”
He nodded. “Yeah.”
I held my hand out. “I’m—”
“I know who you are,” he said as he took my hand.
Of course. In Mallory’s world, I was infamous—in the book of her life, probably the biggest antagonist. I was sure she’d filled him in on all of the details of our demise, a great example of all of the things not to do. Still, I’d loved her. I wanted her to have closure, and this was me giving it to her.
I sucked up my pride. “Hey, I hear congratulations are in order.”
She cleared her throat. “Yeah. We…we got engaged.” Rather than stick her hand out like most women might to display an engagement ring, she moved her hand behind her as if to hide it from me.
Interesting. Not sure if it meant anything, but I noticed.
It was weird. I’d always imagined this moment as worse than it actually was. As uncomfortable as it may have been to chat with Mallory and her fiancé, I did want her to be happy. My issues with how our relationship ended had more to do with my own guilt than anything.
“I want you to know I wish you the best. I’m really glad I ran into you today because I probably wouldn’t have made a point to tell you that otherwise.”
A part of me still loved her. I always would.
Her eyes seared into mine. “Thank you, Ryder. That does mean a lot to me.”
I pursed my lips and nodded a few times before I said, “Well, I’ll let you guys go.”
Mallory’s stare lingered on me, her eyes masking so many unsaid words. I knew if Aaron weren’t standing right there, she might have unleashed some of them.
I wondered if this was how things would always be with us—just a blur of weird emotions and tension—or if someday we would be able to walk by each other and wave. Maybe someday the past would be in the past, but the look on her face gave me the impression that right now the past was still very much in the present.
I held my hand up. “Bye.”
“Bye,” she said. Aaron simply nodded.
As I walked away, I felt a sense of peace. Facing her had been the last step in ridding myself of the negative energy I’d been carrying around. Things may not have wrapped up neatly in a bow with us, but at least I faced her.
I knew, though, that a good portion of my peace really came from Eden, as fucked-up as that was. She’d come along at a time when I really needed a distraction. And what she’d given me was more than that. I’d thought I was dead inside until she helped awaken things again. She might not have wanted to fully reveal herself to me, but I was certain she cared. And that feeling of being truly cared for was something only a few people in my life had given me.
As the days went on, though, I’d begun to wonder more and more about who Eden really was, and what she was hiding from me. I didn’t think I could last much longer like this.
The situation was slowly breaking me.