She didn’t get it. “Another three weeks? I can’t last another second.”
She looked stunned. That made two of us.
Heather took a step toward me. “Nothing has ever hurt as badly as the pain of wanting you and not getting to have you, trying to hide my feelings from you. I don’t want to hurt like this anymore. I don’t care about next week or three weeks or next year. All I care about is now. I know damn well what will happen between us if you stay. That’s exactly why I don’t want you to leave.”
Fuck.
So many thoughts swirled through my brain. I took a moment to see her, this beautiful young woman who wanted to experience being with me. And I wanted nothing but to be with her. If I turned away now, would I look back at this moment for the rest of my life with regret? Would it haunt me—the moment I had an opportunity for something I wanted but threw it away? The moment I stopped us both from experiencing what we so badly wanted?
My head battled my heart and body—two against one. I knew with every ounce of my soul that if I moved toward her right now, it would be over. And it wouldn’t be my head that won.
The pain in her eyes was like nothing I’d ever seen, not even when her father had pulled the rug out from under her.
For the first time, I realized I might be hurting her more by denying her. Or maybe that’s just what I wanted to believe. Maybe it’s what I had to believe, because there was no turning back.
My mind went blank as physical need overtook it. I no longer knew wrong from right. I no longer had a sense of time. I just needed her.
“Come here.”
“Are you gonna send me away?”
“No. Not gonna do that.”
She walked to me and fell into my arms. I held her tightly. For the first time, I let myself breathe her in, hold her the way I wanted to without resisting.
I was a goner.CHAPTER NINETEEN* * *HEATHERWhen he lifted me into his arms and placed his lips on mine, I thought about how many times I’d imagined him doing this very thing. Feeling weightless, I wrapped my legs around his body, holding on to him for dear life.
Don’t leave.
Please don’t leave.
I’d been with one other person in my life, and he’d been a boy in every sense—mentally and physically. Noah was a man, larger than life in both body and mind. Getting to be with him like this incited unprecedented sensations within me. His sheer size rendered me powerless, and I’d never been so happy. I wanted him to own every inch of me.
I hoped I wasn’t embarrassing myself with how eagerly I was kissing him, tasting him—basically humping him. It felt so good to be swept up by this man and kissed with everything he had in him, to feel the warmth of his breath filling me. I felt out of control—like a feral cat.
Moving my hips, I rubbed against the massive bulge in his jeans, his heat resonating between my legs. Knowing I’d made him hard like that gave me immense satisfaction. I needed him to enter me.
“Don’t hate me for my weakness,” he groaned through our kiss.
“I’ll hate you if you stop.”
He smiled over my lips. Thank God we’re on the same page.
“I’ve never wanted anything like I want you, Heather. You make me so fucking crazy.”
I couldn’t even wait for him to undress me. I broke away from our kiss long enough to lift my shirt over my head and throw it on the ground. Staring into his eyes, I unsnapped my bra and let it fall to our feet.
His breathing was labored as he took in the sight of my bare breasts for a few seconds before bearing down on them with his mouth. The wetness of his tongue and the heat of his breath on my nipples practically caused me to orgasm. I could feel my clit throbbing as Noah sucked so hard I wanted to scream. It hurt so good. He used to treat me like a little girl, but he was handling me like a woman tonight; I was grateful for that. I may not have been that experienced, but I knew I could take whatever he had to give. My body was ready. It had been gearing up for this moment from the first time I’d laid eyes on him.
He took my nipple gently between his teeth. “So, so beautiful…”
I pressed his head deeper into me, raking through his hair with my fingernails as he sucked on my neck. I knew there would be marks on me tomorrow, and I didn’t care. Starving to taste him again, I guided him back up to my mouth. I kept expecting him to be bossy, tell me to slow down, scold me for my eagerness. But he never did.