I stared at him incredulously.
“Come on,” he prodded. “My treat. I’m not rude enough to invite you out and not pay for dinner. Bad enough I don’t have a vehicle.”
I shook my head and started the car. Could my life get any more bizarre?
I ended up driving us downtown. We parked and ventured into a bar and grill that was packed with people. The floor was sticky with spilled beer, and sports played on every one of the various TVs mounted on the walls. This certainly wasn’t how I’d imagined this evening. I was tired, stressed, and emotional, and now I planned to eat my feelings.
We ordered, and after the waiter brought my gigantic burger with a side of curly fries, Weldon watched me eat, seeming amused.
“Damn. You can really throw down,” he said.
I took another huge bite of my burger and spoke with my mouth full. “What are we supposed to tell your brother when he asks how the musical was? I’m not lying.”
“You don’t have to lie. I’ll tell him the truth and take the blame. He’s already disappointed in me for so many reasons. What’s one more?”
Wiping ketchup off the side of my mouth, I said, “What’s going on with your life, Weldon?”
His expression changed, and he exhaled. “I don’t know. I wish I could tell you.”
I put down what was left of my burger. “How long have you been living like this…drinking and surfing, or whatever it is that you do?”
He took a sip of his beer and closed his eyes momentarily. “When my mother died, I lost my way. I left my lawyer job in New York and never went back. Mother left me a lot of money, and I guess I took advantage of having the resources to do whatever I wanted. I’m still taking advantage.”
“Well, normally I would say ‘as long as you’re happy,’ but it doesn’t seem like you are.”
“I’m not,” he said without hesitation. “I’m lost.”
I just looked at him, hoping he would elaborate.
He finally did. “My brother...no matter what he ever decided to do in life, he was successful. He dropped out of law school—didn’t matter. You just knew he was going to find a way to do something even better. The next thing you know, he’s fucking building robots. He finds his passions, you know? Heck, they fucking find him. I never found a passion. I hated practicing law but did it anyway because I didn’t know what the hell else to do.”
He dropped his head in his hands for a moment. “In Mother’s eyes, though, I could do no wrong. She was the one person who believed in me, even when I fucked up. When she died, it felt like a part of me died along with her. The one person who loved me unconditionally was gone.”
I could relate to that feeling.
“I’m sorry, Weldon.”
“I know I can’t live like this forever. I just hope I can find my way back to real life at some point. I need help. I know that.”
I nodded. “When my mother died, it felt like my world ended, too. And I’ve been struggling to find my way ever since. I feel very alone. And until I got this job helping your dad, I didn’t have much purpose. It’s helped me immensely.”
“I can’t get over the fact that he thinks you’re your mother.”
“The weird thing is, I really don’t mind. It feels like it’s keeping her alive in some way, even if only for him.”
“That’s some deep shit.”
I found myself sort of enjoying Weldon’s company. He was a lost soul for sure, but in many ways, so was I. And even though he had a drink next to him, over the past hour, he hadn’t been drinking very much.
We fell into comfortable conversation as he told me some stories from California. I filled him in on some of my experiences with his dad over the past several months. Then the mood changed.
“So, be honest, do you still have feelings for my brother?” he asked.
I suddenly felt flushed. “Why do you ask?”
“You seemed uncomfortable around him and Paige today. It was a feeling I got.”
Playing with a leftover fry, I said, “It’s complicated.”
“You really wrecked him back then. He’d never been in love before—until you.”
My body clenched. Gavin was not only my first love, but my only love. I didn’t want to know what I had done to him. I knew I’d hurt him badly, but I’d been able to block out the details. Weldon had been there, though. I should have stopped him from telling me more, but I didn’t.
“After you broke up with him, he wouldn’t talk to anyone for days. I had no idea what the fuck was going on. I finally made him take a drive with me, and he confessed you’d ended things. He was so fucked up over it. And then he was just…gone. He had to leave for Yale. But he left heartbroken.”