Frankie nodded again. This time, when I started singing, she joined right in. My brows jumped hearing how pretty her voice was. I didn’t know why, but I hadn’t expected she could really sing. Her voice was tiny, but she sang in perfect pitch and had the sweetest sound I’d heard in a long time. I lowered my own voice to hear more of hers, and she kept going. Eventually, I stopped singing altogether and just watched her take it away.
The resemblance to Luca was really uncanny, and I thought my girl might get a kick out of seeing Frankie sing, too. So I dug my phone out of my pocket and motioned to her mum that I’d like to record and got her blessing. I seriously couldn’t have conjured up a better part of any song to capture on video to send to Luca than what unfolded as I pressed “Record.”Since the day that you left
I felt a hole in my heart.
Going through the motions
Through the window I thrive
But behind the curtain I only surviveI hit the button to turn the camera around to face me and leaned in to join little Frankie for the chorus while holding my arm out to keep recording.The world keeps spinning without you.
The world keeps spinning round and round.
The world keeps spinning, but I stand still
I stand still
I stand stillWhen I was done, the crowd around us started to applaud. I put out my hand to shake little Frankie’s and then kissed the top of her hand before kissing her mum’s cheek.
“You stay right here,” I said. “I’m going to send my manager back out in a few minutes to get you some backstage passes so you can meet the rest of my mates and see the concert from the first row.”
“Oh my God!” Frankie’s mum covered her mouth. “Thank you so much.”
“No, thank you for sharing your daughter with me today.”
I signed a few autographs on my way to the entrance and then located my manager to go run out and make sure Frankie got some VIP treatment. Since the sound check I’d come early to run through wasn’t ready for me yet, I headed to my dressing room and sat down to play back the video I’d recorded.
Watching it made me realize how much being with Luca had really changed things for me. I used to get a high walking into a concert venue filled with screaming fans, but now I got that same feeling thinking about having a little girl with Luca someday. Money and fame couldn’t buy happiness, and I was starting to think I’d trade thousands of women wearing my face on their chests for one woman resting her face on my chest at night. That was pretty fucked up.
But my Luca had had a tough few days. She and Doc had ventured out to get Hortencia some food, and she’d had a meltdown in the store. Apparently she’d had an easier time with little outings like that before our incident in Chicago, so she’d been feeling particularly defeated lately. The video was the perfect message to cheer her up.
Or so I thought.
I typed a text out before attaching the video.
Griffin: This little beauty’s name is Frankie. She looks just like I picture our own little girl might look. Frankie picked the song to sing, but the words couldn’t be more fitting for how I feel without you by my side, love. I stand still. The world keeps spinning, but I stand still without you. XO Call you after the show tonight.
I hit “Send” just as the sound tech knocked on my door. “Ready when you are, Cole.”
“Sounds good. Be out in a minute. Just waiting to hear back from my girl.”
I watched as the message went from “Sent” to “Delivered” to “Read.”
The video was probably a minute or two long, so I didn’t expect an immediate response. Though after ten minutes, I didn’t want to keep the team waiting too much longer. So I headed out to the stage. I checked my phone one last time before we started.
Still nothing.
Luca must’ve been busy writing. I knew how I got when I was in the middle of composing a song. Sometimes I’d go into my own little bubble, and making any outside contact would pop it. I figured I’d hear back from her by the time the sound check was done.
Though I figured wrong.“What the fuck, Luca?”
I paced back and forth in my hotel room after hitting “Redial” for the tenth time. Luca hadn’t written back by the time my sound check ended. She also hadn’t written back by the time the concert had started, either. When I still hadn’t heard from her after the show ended, I started to worry. So I’d sent her a text to check in. Just like the video I’d sent, she’d read it but sent nothing in response. I also left her a few voice messages.