Blind Reader Wanted

“Does he use a gun, Jimbo?”

“We don’t nobody use guns no more, lass. Crossbows: they’re the business. Fast, quiet, and deadlier than my mother-in-law.”

I bit my lip. “Does everybody use crossbows nowadays then?”

“Well, the smart ones do.”

So the Sheriff was right when he said a lot of hunters had crossbows.

“Do you know what kind of crossbow Sawyer has?”

“He had the same model as me, but I heard he’s upgraded. The lads were saying his sweetheart gave him a real fancy one for his birthday.” He wound down the glass and spat into the street.

Thirty-eight

Lara

That night Kit was restless. He kept going out to check on the wolves, and earlier, the whole time he was eating the roast chicken I’d cooked, I could feel how tense he was. He would suddenly go quiet, as if he was listening out for unusual noises.

In bed, we made love, but he was different. He pounded into me as if there were demons driving him. It was the same man, same body, but the drive was different. Later, he apologized, if he had been too rough, if he had hurt me.

“No, you didn’t hurt me. I enjoyed it,” I told him.

He took me again, this time gently, holding back and letting me climax before he’d allow himself to. I fell asleep in his arms.

I woke up cold. He was not next to me. I pulled on some clothes and went downstairs. He was outside in the freezing cold sitting on the old, tall chair with the wolves gathered around him. I could tell instantly that they were mourning. They seemed to be such a close-knit unit, I almost felt as if I was intruding.

“What are you doing?” I whispered from the doorway.

“I couldn’t sleep,” he said.

“You’ll catch a cold.”

I heard him stand up and walk towards me. He touched my face and his hands were like little blocks of ice.

“You’re freezing,” I said anxiously.

“I’m used to the cold.” He wrapped his big arms around me.

I shivered. “Do you want me to make you a cup of hot chocolate? I brought marshmallows.”

“Oh, Lara. I don’t know what I did to deserve you, but I thank God every day for you.”

I smiled up at him. “Is that a yes?”

“That’s a yes.”

“Sit by the fire and wait for me. I won’t be long,” I said, but he didn’t go in and make himself comfortable by the fire, he followed me into the kitchen and sat at the table.

Into a saucepan I put four tablespoons of cocoa powder, and an equal amount of sugar. “I’ll have to go back tomorrow,” I said. “I’ve got to finish my mermaid.”

“All right. I’ll take you back after breakfast.”

“Thank you,” I said as I added a pinch of salt, and two tablespoons of milk into the mixture. I put the pan over a low heat and started to whisk it. Listening to the sound the whisk made, I could tell when the sugar was dissolved. I poured the rest of the milk and carried on whisking.

“I’ll get the mugs,” Kit said.

I poured the creamy hot liquid into the mugs. “Would you prefer marshmallows or a boozy addition?” I asked.

“Boozy?” he said.

I pulled out the bottle of Bourbon from the cupboard and gave it to him. I heard him pour in a generous amount while I tore open the packet of mini marshmallows and dropped a handful into my drink. Then we went into the living room and drank our chocolate by the fire.

“Do you know anyone who is against the idea of you being with me?” he asked suddenly.

“Everybody, I would have thought,” I said slowly. I couldn’t tell him the truth. As much as I hated to admit it, Sheriff Bradley was right. I could make things a lot worse. I needed to talk to Sawyer myself first.

I felt him shift and lean forward. “No, someone who is angry about it. Someone who feels the need to take revenge. But a coward. A man. A man who feels something for you.”

I bent towards my mug so he wouldn’t be able to see the expression on my face. “Maybe it is a good idea to let Sheriff Bradley investigate first.”

He stood up and paced the floor. “He’s not going to do anything, Lara. His job is not to uphold law and order. His real purpose is to protect the rich. He’s their attack dog.”

“But he can’t just not do anything. He has to investigate.”

“Yeah, I’ve seen sham investigations before. I know exactly what his investigations will turn up. Nothing.”

“At least give him a chance,” I said, and hated the way I sounded even as I made the pathetic suggestion.

“I can’t sit here while out there roams a man who can shoot my wolves anytime he pleases. He could be out there right now, Lara. Just waiting for the lights to go off so he can fire another arrow.”

I covered my face with my hands. I felt so guilty. If not for me Chepi would not be dead. Even now I couldn’t tell him what I knew, because I was afraid he would do something crazy, and end up behind bars. Everybody in this town was just waiting for him to put a foot wrong.

He strode towards me and crouched in front of me. Gently he grasped my hands with his and removed them from my face. “You know something, don’t you?”

“I can’t tell you yet,” I whispered. “Please don’t ask me to tell you.”

“Are you protecting someone?” he asked in a shocked voice.

“Yes. I’m protecting you,” I sobbed.

“Me? It’s not your job to protect me, Lara. I’m here to protect you.”

“If you approach him it will only make things worse. Let me talk to him first.”

“What?” he exploded. “No fucking way. It’ll be a cold day in hell before I let my woman be in the same room as a coward who has to make his point with a crossbow from sixty yards away.”

“I won’t talk to him,” I said immediately. “I’ll talk to someone he respects. Someone he’ll never dare go against.”

“Lara, I don’t know how your brain works, but no, that is not an acceptable solution. You have to trust me. I’m not a fool. I won’t go crazy. I won’t hurt anyone, but I need you to tell me so I can sort this out. My wolves are sitting ducks out there while this maniac is allowed to run free.”

“It’s not so simple.”

“No?”

I shake my head.

“Explain it to me.” He sounded like he was losing his patience.

“He’s in love with me, but he’s marrying another woman for her money. He thought no one else would want me, and that in two years he would have made a pile of money using her father’s contacts, and then he would be able to divorce her and marry me.”

“Fuck, what a sick piece of shit,” he spat.

“So you see, I don’t want to spoil it for him, because then it will be worse for us. I just want to warn him to stay away because I’m with you and he’s with her. I think I can convince him that I love you, and he might as well stick with her as there is no hope for him and me.”

“You’ll do no such thing. The man is dangerous and-.” He broke off mid-sentence and froze. “Someone’s coming. Stay here. Don’t move,” he ordered, and I could hear his footsteps running to get his weapon. Then, to my astonishment, he stopped running, and paused for a second before he started walking back towards me. He stood in front of me, and all the anger and tension had drained out him.

Suddenly, he seemed like a beaten man.

“What?” I whispered, more frightened than I had ever been in my life.

He knelt beside me, and I reached out a trembling hand to touch his face. His eyes were closed with regret or sorrow. I could hear a vehicle coming up the road.

“Who is coming?” I asked, my voice shaking

“Oh, Lara. I never meant for you to find out like this.”

Thirty-nine

Lara

“Find out what?” I gasped.

He sagged, his forehead rested against my chest, and

the feeling that something was not just wrong, but horribly wrong descended on me like a sheet thrown over a bed. It was not heavy enough to take my breath, but light enough to give me goosebumps. I sat there like a statue, my hands gripping the table edge, the now-familiar whisper of the fire in the woodstove loud in the strange silence.