Can't Let Her Go
Page 8
I look into her eyes. “You know what has to happen?” I ask.
“Yes, I must take you inside me.”
“You sure you’re ready?” I ask, although I’m not going to stop, not now.
“I am sure. Do it.”
“It may hurt like crazy,” I warn.
She grips the sides of my head, tugging me down. “Kiss me,” she whispers, her voice shaking. “Can you kiss me, please?”
Hunter
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SQTHB4jM-KQ
(Wild Horses)
I crush my lips to her as her arms wrap around me and her sweet, pliant mouth opens beneath mine, allowing my tongue to sweep inside. She meets the dance of my tongue … and bliss. Complete and utter bliss. I never thought I’d experience this in my life. It intoxicates me and I kiss her like a starving man. I don’t take my lips away from hers even as we both fight to catch our breaths, inhaling and exhaling through each other’s mouths, our chests rising and falling in rhythm. Her hips jerk under mine, inviting me to fuck while she sucks on my tongue.
But I’m not going to bust her open just yet. I don’t want her to scream. I slip two fingers into her wet pussy. Fuck, but she is tight. Really tight. And I am really big. It’s not going to go well for her. She looks into my eyes and I can see that she trusts me. She shouldn’t. I’m doing this because she’s just too sexy and too willing.
With my other hand, I caress her breast. I don’t stop stroking. I’m trying my best to lull her into some kind of trance. If she’s focused on something else, this may not hurt so much.
She moans and jerks her hips, telling me she wants it.
I know this is the moment. I pinch her nipple hard and her mouth opens in a gasp. While she is distracted with that sensation, I push my big ugly dick into her beautiful virgin cunt—in one smooth movement.
I feel the breakthrough and so can she. She doesn’t scream, but her eyes pop wide open. I know I hurt her. I can feel that I hurt her.
She swallows hard.
“Are you all right?” I ask.
“Yessss,” she whispers. “Finish. I want to feel you finish.”
“Sure?”
“Sure.”
I stay still and let her adjust, feel, accept the intrusion. She pants as her lips are pursed tight. I hold until her eyelids flutter. She’s ready for me to stretch her again.
I start to make shallow thrusts. I’m so fucking aroused, I can hardly bear to keep making these shallow thrusts when all I want to do is ram in all the way.
“Go on. Go all the way,” she urges.
I don’t hesitate. I can’t stop. I slam into her and I explode. Her eyes widen again, and I can tell she feels it. No, she’s not having an orgasm. She’ll have to wait for that. A better man than me will give her that. But I have an orgasm, a great orgasm. I hold her until I don’t spurt any more. I’m panting. I’m sweating. Sex with Katya is consuming. I roll off her, my erection fading. She lies beside me. Her breathing is not as labored as mine. We don’t touch. I don’t think that’s a good idea. I’m leaving in the morning as soon as the Sherpa and I collect the package.
At another time, in another place, I would work until she has an orgasm. She deserves that. But this is Russia and I’m some stupid American on a mission that I don’t understand. I shouldn’t have gone out and I shouldn’t have had a drink, and I sure as hell shouldn’t have picked up Katya. Now, I was in that predictable post-sex guilt. She deserves better. But I’m not going to tell her—as if she didn’t already know. I can’t tell her that I want her gone. I can’t tell her that I probably won’t remember her a year from now. I can’t tell her that I’ll make sure I don’t remember her. It’s just sex, just sex.
There are a lot of I shouldn’t haves running through my mind.
She is mesmerizingly beautiful, but that isn’t what transfixes my gaze to her as she lies sprawled by my side, her nipples swollen and reddened, perhaps by the ever-lingering ghost of cold air in the room or the fact that I had been unable to stop sucking on them. What glues my gaze to her is quite simply the fact I can’t look away. I don’t want her to catch me staring so greedily, but I just can’t seem to drag my gaze away. I feel my chest warm up dangerously as I find myself pulling the sheet up to cover her in case she’s cold.
I instantly stop myself. What the fuck am I doing?
I jerk the covering completely away from her to expose her pale lush breasts and pink nipples, perfectly rounded and perked to attention as though ready once again to surrender its owner completely to me.
“I must go now,” she whispers.
“Not yet. I’m not finished.”
“Only if you are quick or I will lose my ride back.”
I cover one creamy mound with my mouth and suck viciously on its sweetness. She responds with a sharp intake of breath. I lift my gaze to meet her slightly widened eyes. It’s a dare, but for what … I don’t know. I’m prepared to hold her down, to have my last feast of her before she goes away.
Her response is to arch her body into mine and claw her fingers into my hair. She is pure fire. It’s almost hard to believe that a woman of such passion and heat was a virgin until a few minutes ago, but my thrust through the barrier of her sex and the visible stain of blood against the sheets couldn’t be contested.
Her gaze slides down to my cock. It is already rock hard with bulging veins.
“Do you see how hard you make me?” I accuse.
A sweet smile of power spreads across her luscious lips and I feel it as a kick to the heart. I slam into her almost vengefully and her back arches off the bed.
The moan from her throat is deep. I keep my eyes glued to her face as I pull slowly out of her, watching as the grating of my dick up her tight textured walls has her breath coming in short, fleeting spurts.
Her eyes are clenched shut and I hate that.
She grabs my hips when I almost slip out of her, her eyes shooting open to meet mine in an almost threatening glare. She doesn’t say a word but none is needed.
“Keep your eyes open,” I growl.
Those green jewels stay on me as I slam my cock back into her. Her hands bundle the bedsheets beneath her into fists. Fuck!” she gasps, in Russian.
I feel a smile settle on my lips. Her soft, but fiery tone makes the curse sound like an enchantment. An invitation to sin. To fuck until the world outside dissolves again.
She releases the sheet and throws her arms around me, urging me on. I drive hard into her, her hips rising and gyrating to meet my thrusts down into her core, as she squeezes every ounce of pleasure out of me. I fuck us both senseless, my balls slamming hard against her as we damn near break that rickety bed.
She claws her nails down my back as she cries out words that are incoherent to me. All I can do is feel the storm of ecstasy that possesses my entire body and quickly leads me up to the edge of a cliff I very much want to jump off of.
As if she had reads my mind she grabs my hips and urges me frantically on, pounding her soft pussy onto my shaft. I go with her. Submitting completely to her as she milks me of all that I am.
“Come with me,” I snarl and at the command, she explodes. Her cries and my groans fill the small room, resounding off the walls and hitting our rutting bodies. I shoot my seed into the condom, hot and deep and never ending, as I feel her juices splashing on my thighs.
My hips refuse to stop, driving into her mercilessly until we both can’t breathe. I collapse on top of her, my face buried in her neck in sheer wonder … and embarrassment. I had lost complete and utter control. What kind of bewitchment is this? For the first time in my life I lost control of myself. She holds onto me tightly as we slowly come back to earth and even when I try to pull out of her, as I become aware of the intimacy of our position she locks me in place with her legs curved around my body and refuses to let go.
I feel a strange reluctance to move too. This will be our last time and I don’t want it to be. I want to keep her.
“We won?
??t see each other again, but that’s OK. I got what I wanted. I hope you did too,” she murmurs in my ear.
I shut my eyes. Shit. This is my punishment for all the girls who wanted to make it more and I blanked them off. Now the shoe is on the other foot. Finally, I know how they felt. I try to tell myself she is just a one-night stand. That I can’t get soppy over her. That she’s just something that happened to me in the wastelands of Russia, but it all feels hollow and depressing. “I got the better,” I answer. “But thanks. If I offer money, will that offend you?”
“Yes. I’m not a whore.”
“I know, and I’m sorry.
Sometimes after sex with a woman, I’ll leave a bill or two, something to help with the rent, but I can’t even bring myself to do that.
I touch her cheek, and she smiles. She has a great smile.
Her beautiful eyes look sad suddenly. “I better go.”
I move my body. It feels like lead.
She slides off the bed and starts to get dressed again.
I watch her blankly. She is leaving. I want to stop her, but something inside me won’t allow it. I know I cannot have her. Even if I took her back to Detroit with me, Anakin would ruin it. The only time I felt something for a girl was when I was nineteen. Mary-Jane had just got off the bus from a small town in North Dakota when I smiled at her. She was so innocent and green she still had hay in her hair. Anakin knew I liked her because he saw us in the bar together so he pursued her himself. She stood no chance. She fell for the sweet talk, the diamonds and the furs. It’s hard to resist the champagne lifestyle when you were used to working at the farm all day.
After he had had sex with her, he called me to his bedroom so I would see her in his bed, disheveled and still reeking of him. While he talked to me he moved the sheet that covered her and ran his hand up her thigh. Still watching me, he casually slipped a finger into her and started to finger fuck her.
I could tell she felt horribly embarrassed, but she let him. She thought it was what sophisticated people did. I felt sick to my stomach, but I stood there and let him humiliate me and her. Two days later, he chucked her out without the furs and the diamonds. She went back to North Dakota with her tail between her legs.