Pretty Wicked

‘Hello, Lexi.’

‘Mr. Barokas, Nigel Palmer. Nigel, Miko Barokas.’ I turned smoothly toward Nigel. ‘Mr. Barokas just acquired Salinger Inc.’

Nigel stood and shook hands with Miko. Then he did an odd thing. He sat back down and catching my hand from under the table brought it up to the surface, and held it tightly inside his pale one. I saw Miko’s eyes rush to our clasped hands. Perhaps Nigel had felt the bristling sexual tension that was coming in waves from Miko and was laying his claim.

‘Will you join us for a drink, Mr. Barokas?’ Nigel offered coldly. I stared at Nigel. Was he being rude? Nigel was never rude.

‘No, I’m actually leaving. I just came to say goodbye and wish you a pleasant evening.’

‘Thank you,’ Nigel replied stiffly.

‘Very kind of you,’ I added softly, and Miko suddenly swiveled his black eyes in my direction. They were blazing with desire. My thighs clenched helplessly. WTF was going on with me?!

‘You’re welcome,’ he murmured softly, and then he had turned around and walked away. I stared at his retreating back with confusion. I had never reacted to a man like that before. When I turned back to Nigel he was looking at me sadly.

‘What is it?’ I asked.

He broke a bread roll dispiritedly and began viciously buttering it. ‘When I was very young my father used to play Dr. Hook’s records. One of my favorites was ‘When You’re in Love with a Beautiful Woman’. The lyrics were good. Do you know it?’

I shook my head.

‘When you’re in love with a beautiful woman, it’s hard. Everybody wants her. Everybody loves her. Everybody wants to take your baby home. You want to trust her, but then somebody hangs up when you answer the phone. When you’re in love with a beautiful woman, you go it alone.’

He laid the buttered bread roll on his side plate and looked up at me. I stared at him, surprised.

He seemed a stranger. I had been dipping my toes in the ocean of his soul. ‘You watch her eyes. You look for lies,’ he sang tunelessly, his voice gruff with emotion.

What was he telling me?

‘I’m in love with you, Lexi.’

The thought that flashed in my mind was crystal clear: But I don’t love you. And suddenly I felt terribly guilty. I didn’t love him and I could never love him. In a funny sort of way I was no better than Miko Barokas.

I reached forward for his hand and he snatched it away violently. ‘Don’t. Please don’t pity me,’ he whispered.

‘I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I…’ I trailed away. I had no excuse. I should never have started with him. I should never have let it go this far. I should have seen the signs. All my motives were selfish. I’m not a good person.

He raised his hand. A waiter came.

‘Bill please.’

‘Ah, but—’ began the waiter.

Nigel cut him off rudely. ‘Just charge me for everything I’ve had and everything you’ve already begun cooking.’

The waiter scurried away.

Nigel pulled his wallet out of his trouser pocket. I loved him, but as a brother. A dear friend. Someone with whom I had lain on the couch watching How to Lose a Man in Ten Days. He was the kind of man who knew how to make fluffy cheese soufflés. I mean, come on, what full-blooded American man knows how to do that? I had loved my time with him. It was warm and safe and unthreatening.

The bill arrived. He slipped his card swiftly onto the little platter. The waiter processed it and he slotted it smartly back into a compartment in his wallet.

‘I love you, Lexi,’ he confessed bitterly, not looking at me.

‘Can we talk about this, Nigel?’

He totally ignored me and said, ‘And if ever, ever you think I could be more to you than just a buddy you dispense mercy fucks to then call me, because I want to marry you.' He pulled out a box from his jacket and opened it. A diamond solitaire—small but very, very sparkly—winked and flashed on a bed of dark blue velvet. There were no crappy stones around it to make it look flashier than it was. I stared at it. ‘Take it for what it is; otherwise, consider it a bloody expensive goodbye present,’ he muttered, and snapping the box shut, tossed it carelessly on the table.

I stared at his hurt face, blankly. He had brought me here to propose. How selfish I had been. How fucking blind.

With a forlorn shake of his head he left the table.

I should have left, but for the moment I did nothing. I was too shocked by the direction our relationship had taken. The group from the office was small. Most of them had gone home, but Janey was still there and I didn’t want to join them. I lifted my glass of wine and took a sip, and then the door opened and Miko walked back into the restaurant. My eyes widened. He walked up to my table and stood towering over me. I remained silent, unsure what I should do or say next.

‘How about it?’ he asked, his eyes clear and direct. How different his eyes were compared to Nigel’s.

‘How about what?’ I parried coolly.

‘Going out with me?’

~~~~~

Five

His words fell like pearls on the edges of my heart. ‘Are you propositioning me?’

‘Do they still speak like that in England?'

‘Mr. Barokas—’ I began.

‘I’ve wanted you since I laid eyes on you this morning.’

My breath caught in my throat. I felt an odd heat inside my body. Strange thoughts entered my head. Forbidden old dreams of lying underneath him or being ravished by that beautiful mouth. I thought of Nigel. I thought of his pain. There was nothing I could do about that. But there was something I could do about mine.

‘Sit down then,’ I invited softly, recklessly.

His eyes flickered, warm for a second. An easy conquest for the great Miko Barokas. He slid into the chair that Nigel had vacated. I took another sip of my drink and eyed him over the rim of my glass. His golden skin radiated sensuality. I wanted to touch it. I licked my suddenly dry lips and glanced at his large hands. They lay relaxed on the table. I thought of them moving on my body in a long, slow massage.

‘You have all my attention,’ I murmured.

‘So do you, Lexi Johnson. So do you.’

The way he said it brought a surge of wild color to my face. I swallowed and pretended that he didn’t have such a strong effect on me. I tried to calm the fast pace of my heart and reminded myself that he was the enemy. This was the mean boy who humiliated me and forever changed the course of my life. I let my eyes drop to the table—it was impossible to think when I gazed into those bottomless pools of black ink—and my eyes fell on the velvet box. My eyes flew up to meet his and they, too, were on the box.

‘Why did you come back?’ I asked.

‘I went outside to make a phone call and I saw him pay the bill and leave.’

‘So what now?’

‘I’m going to have you in my bed.’

No, you’re fucking not. I smiled seductively and raised one intrigued eyebrow. ‘Really.’ My voice was cool.

‘Yes, really.’

My eyes swiveled over to the table where my colleagues were sitting. Janey was staring at us, her mean, dried up, sex-starved mouth set in a straight line of unconcealed hatred. Here was another truth I had refused to confront—my boss hated my guts. There’ll be big trouble in the office tomorrow.

‘Don’t tell me you don’t feel it too?’

I brought my eyes back to him. I had never seen eyes more impenetrable than Miko’s. There was nothing there but a blank wall and a stated lust. He wanted the beautiful me, not the real me, the freak me. I thought of Nigel, his eyes full of desire, disappointment, admiring, laughing, sad. But what color were his eyes? I could not remember. That’s because I only remembered him in black and white. The only eyes I had ever really looked into and remembered vividly were Miko’s soot-black eyes. So black they swallowed all the other colors around them. Everything became pale and inconsequential in comparison.

‘I want you too…’ I said very

softly.

A waiter came up to the table, caught my eyes, and winked slyly. He turned his attention to Miko. ‘Can I get you something, sir?’

‘No thank you, I won’t be staying,’ Miko threw over his shoulder, not taking his gaze off me.

‘…but I work for you,’ I finished.

He frowned. ‘I don’t see that that matters either way. Although, technically you don’t. You happen to work for one of the companies I own.’

‘Right.’

Around us ‘Come Up and See Me (Make Me Smile)’ by Steve Harley boomed. Miko’s lips quirked. He really did have the most beautiful lips I had ever seen on anybody. Ever. The top lip was slightly plumper than the lower lip and it was so red it was as if he was wearing lipstick or had just eaten a bowl of cherries. I thought about biting his mouth.

‘I ordered that song specially for you,’ he murmured.

I laughed and his eyes narrowed. The laughter died in my throat. Whatever it was between us it was like tinder. Extremely flammable. I had to be careful. I did not want to perish in the flames.

‘I’ll give you a ride home.’

‘Thanks, but I live only five minutes away from here. The walk will do me good.’

‘It’s late. Allow me the pleasure.’

‘Fine.’ I picked up the blue box, dropped it into my purse, snapped it shut and stood. As I neared him his hand touched mine. The inconsequential contact stirred a deep, fierce hunger within me. His fingers drifted up my arm. I looked into his eyes and was shocked to see the intensity of his need. The magic of desire swirled around us.

Take control, Lexi. Take control.

I shifted away from him. The space made a difference. My senses cleared somewhat. I hated this man. The only thing I wanted from him was revenge. To take him to a high place and drop him. In my head a small voice laughed at me. Or maybe you will get burned again. I ignored it.

There was a chauffeured Mercedes waiting outside.

‘Driving in London is a nightmare,’ he explained.