"This B&B was the final nail in our coffin. One I should have pounded in a long time ago."
Justin could barely keep from pumping his fist into the air. Which wasn't at all the appropriate response when coming here, seeing her again, was supposed to be about rekindling their friendship--and nothing more. Likewise, he shouldn't ask the question that was burning a hole in his tongue. "Any winemakers swept you off your feet?"
"Dating is the last thing I've been worried about. Between getting this place redone and dealing with--" She abruptly cut herself off, coloring slightly before saying, "What about you? Any pretty frauleins getting lucky with you in Germany?"
Was it just his imagination, or did her voice suddenly sound a little funny? As though she was invested in his answer in a way that went beyond friendship.
"I haven't had much time to date."
"Come on, this is me you're talking to." She shot him a knowing look. "You had to beat girls off with a stick in college. I can't imagine things would be any different now. Surely you haven't been a monk for the past five years."
Of course he hadn't, but none of the women he'd been with had meant anything serious to him. He hadn't led them on, so there weren't any broken hearts as far as he knew. He'd told himself he was too busy with work to worry about a relationship, had convinced himself that he had gotten over, gotten past, his unrequited feelings for Taylor. But now that he was with her again, he had to admit the truth to himself.
He had been waiting for her.
And despite knowing better, he always would.
*
Why was she going on and on about Justin's prowess with women?
The problem was that he looked so good, Taylor was afraid that if she didn't keep saying all those other inane things, she might accidentally blurt, I love you. I've always loved you!
She felt her cheeks burn with mortification at the mere thought of it. She could only imagine how awkward things would get if she ever lost hold of herself and admitted how deep her feelings for him ran. There were few things Taylor regretted more than having forced that kiss on him during their last night together in Palo Alto, especially when she'd seen countless girls try any-and everything they could to snare him.
"Hey." He reached out to brush a lock of hair away from her face. "You okay?"
If he only knew just how not-okay she was. But she didn't want to ruin their reunion with bad news and tears. "I am." And when she looked into his eyes, she realized it was true. Because despite the constant worries that had been hanging over her since her diagnosis, and the huge amount of self-control she needed to exert not to throw herself into his arms, just being close to Justin again made her happier than she'd been in years. "Why don't I show you to your room so that you can settle in?"
He stared at her for a long moment, as though he knew she was keeping something from him, before dropping his hand from her cheek. "Is there any way I could help? Maybe by bringing up your other guests' bags?"
"Thanks, but based on what I know about your nonstop work schedule, you should take some time to relax while you can. There are some great wine-tasting rooms down the street, or restaurants I could recommend if you're hungry."
"I'm happy to stay right here in your garden, eating cookies."
Hugely grateful that the weird place they'd left each other in five years ago seemed to be nothing but water under the bridge, she looped her arm through his the way she used to, took him back inside and up the stairs. His room on the second floor overlooked the garden and pool. "The furniture is all antique, but the mattress is brand new. The Belmonts will be staying in two connected rooms on the other side of the landing, so it should be nice and quiet here for you."
"Where's your room?"
She pointed out the window. "I converted the old garage out back into a one-bedroom studio for myself." The bell over the front door chimed. "They're here! Wish me luck."
"Good luck, Taylor." He leaned forward and kissed her forehead. "I'm happy for you. You're going to do great here, I just know it."
"Thank you." It was barely a whisper. Her heart was so full from his lovely words...and the friendly kiss had her body far more revved up than it should be.
CHAPTER FOUR
Justin was impressed as he looked around his bedroom. Taylor clearly had a knack for creating spaces that were both comfortable and luxurious. If this were anyone else's B&B--and he was this jet-lagged--he'd be looking forward to getting a great night's sleep in the big, plush bed.
But he already knew he was going to spend the night tossing and turning as he thought about Taylor in her bed in the backyard cottage...wishing that she was in his.
Even though she'd turned down his offer to chip in, it was tempting to go downstairs to help her with her guests, simply because he didn't want to miss a minute of being near her this week. But he didn't want it to look like he thought she wasn't capable of running her business on her own, so he grabbed one of the paperback thrillers on a bookshelf in the hallway and headed down the stairs, intending to go out into the garden. He stopped at the base of the stairs when he heard her new guests gushing over the place.
"Your bed-and-breakfast is even prettier than the pictures online," the woman said.
"And it's such a great deal compared to the other places in town." A moment later, the man called out a slightly panicked, "Sophia, Addison, don't smear chocolate on the furniture!" He raced toward the kids with one of the napkins Taylor had put out next to the tray of cookies. "The kids are five and three, but we won't let them make a mess of your place," he promised her.
"Don't worry," Taylor said in her easygoing way. "I wouldn't have made chocolate chunk cookies for you if I was worried about stains."
"You made this?" A little girl with big brown eyes and chocolate across her cheek looked awestruck. "It's the most super yummy cookie ever!"
Taylor laughed, clearly delighted with the five-year-old's praise. "Thank you, Sophia. You're very sweet." She turned to her brother, who had a mischievous glint in his eyes. "Do you like Lego, Addison?" When he nodded so fast it looked like his head might wobble off his neck, she pointed at a big red plastic container in the corner of the parlor. "I've got lots of blocks right over there for you to play with."
Taylor handed the adults glasses of champagne. "Why don't the two of you relax for a few minutes while I take your luggage upstairs?" The couple looked beyond grateful for the chance to sit quietly and sip glasses of bubbly while their kids played happily in a sunny corner of the room.
Justin knew he shouldn't still be standing by the stairs watching them, but he couldn't move. Not when he'd just been hit with a vision, one so clear it staggered him--of himself and Taylor married with two kids of their own, on a family getaway.
He not only saw it, he wanted it. Wanted it with everything in him.
No question about it, his sisters had been right to send him to St. Helena for the week. He'd been defensive last night when they'd told him he needed to remember that there was more to life than the four walls of a lab. He'd told himself that his work was everything, that saving other people's lives was more important than living his own. But though his research was important, and he would never turn his back on it, coming here and seeing Taylor again made him remember that he used to be a man who craved more than just work.
He needed affection. Laughter.
And most of all, love, no matter how impossible that might seem at the moment.
"Justin?" Taylor was standing in front of him now, her head cocked as she asked, "Is there something you need?"
Yes. I need you to be mine. To have and to hold and to love, and then to carry that love forward with our kids, and then our grandkids after that.
When he looked at Taylor, he suddenly saw more than he had even five minutes ago. She was still the beautiful, sweet, brilliant woman he was desperately attracted to...but what he now wanted went far beyond just sharing her bed.
The words were there, right on the tip of his tongue, a
nd he barely managed to hold them back. He didn't want to freak her out, not when they'd only just begun to reconnect. That night at the bar back in college, he'd been too desperate, had moved too fast. This week, he'd force himself to take his time to find a way, any way he could, to bring her around to the idea of them. Together. As more than just friends.
"Just heading into the garden with a book." He was pleased his voice sounded so easy. Not at all like a guy madly plotting to get the woman of his dreams to fall in love with him.
She craned her neck to see the title. "Oh, that's a good one. Scary enough that I kept catching myself holding my breath while I was reading it. I hope you don't mind losing some sleep."
"I'm used to making do without much sleep," he said with a shrug. Catching up on sleep this week was already a lost cause with her so close, but still untouchable. At least, until he reminded her just how good they were together--and proved to her that making the jump from friends to lovers, and then so much more, was the right thing for both of them.
"I'll come out and join you when I get a chance." Smiling, she picked up the two large suitcases and started up the stairs.
Every ounce of chivalry inside of him bucked at watching her carry the bags without his help. He had just about lost the fight when she let out an agonizing sound of pain and dropped them both.
Justin caught the suitcases before they could tumble down the stairs. Taylor was clutching her side and gasping as she sat on the nearest step. "What happened?" He knelt in front of her. "Tell me how I can help. Tell me what you need."