NYC Angels: The Wallflower's Secret

She was waiting along with everyone else in the hall, looking efficient and fresh despite the late hour. It had been a long day for her also. She’d been there every step of the way with the Rivera family. Ryan had been impressed with how well she seemed to be holding up under what had to be a difficult situation for her. To his discontent, he’d found himself worrying about her. Wondering how she was doing. That was a road he didn’t want to travel.

When she’d visited ICU with the family he had been aware of every move she’d made. She’d looked tired, but every bit as committed to the family as he’d hoped she would be. A couple of times she’d looked in his direction with questioning eyes that had also held disappointment. It had been far more difficult not to engage with her than he’d anticipated. Still, he thought it was for the best.

He made every effort to make it through rounds as efficiently as possible. Lucy spoke to each of the families before she left the patient’s room. The families had smiles on their faces when the door closed behind him and his group. She’d turned out to be a real asset. Without a word, she turned toward her office with determined steps.

Having finished on the floor, he headed to his office for a quick wash up before checking on Miguel. There would be no going home for him tonight.

There was a knock on his office door. A nurse coming to get him this late at night wouldn’t be good news. “Come in,” he called.

Lucy stalked forward, stopping in front of his desk.

“There’s a problem?” By the determined look on her face there must be. He had a nagging idea he knew exactly what was bothering her.

“Yes, I’d like to discuss something with you.”

Discuss? Lucy didn’t look like she was in a discussing mood. He’d never heard her sound so forceful, even more so than she’d been a few nights earlier. She’d shared her heartache with him the other night. That had scared him. He didn’t want to know anything else. “Lucy, it’s been a long day and I’m not really up for some major discussion if it’ll wait.”

“It won’t,” she snapped.

Apparently she was on a mission. “Then you can have a seat while I finish cleaning up.”

“‘I’ll stand.” She pulled her sweater tighter around her chest.

“As you wish.”

Her lips tightened. What would it be like to kiss those full lips into a smile of pleasure? Make her forget why she was here? Hadn’t he promised himself that he wouldn’t allow those thoughts? What he needed to do was find some nurse and take her out on a date. Have a good time.

He’d managed to keep Lucy at a distance for the last couple of days but he still couldn’t get the sad look she had when she’d told him about Emily out of his mind. He even remembered the child’s name. He was already far too involved.

After toweling off, he rubbed a hand over his more than five o’clock shadow and decided to shave. Stalling all he could in the hope that Lucy would leave. Five minutes later he stepped out into his office again.

Lucy still remained rooted in the same spot she’d been in when he’d left her. Her brows were drawn together and her mouth had eased but remained in a thin line. She pulled the ever-present cardigan tighter around her and crossed her arms. Her look said she might boil over at any minute.

“So what’s the problem? I know this can’t be about Miguel. He was doing fine when I called to check on him a few minutes ago.”

“No, this is about us.”

“I wasn’t aware there was an ‘us’.”

Before that moment he couldn’t have imagined her standing any straighter or looking more out of sorts, but he’d underestimated her. The blue in her eyes went diamond sharp. If she’d had the capability, he was sure she would’ve sliced him up into small pieces. He moved behind his desk and faced her.

“There isn’t an us. Not the kind you’re insinuating.” Her southern drawl had lost its gentleness, taking on an edge that showed she had a strength she kept hidden. She took a deep breath that made him curl his fingers into fists to keep from touching her.

“What I’m trying to say is that I don’t appreciate the cold-shoulder treatment that you’ve been giving me the last couple of days. I shared something incredibly personal. Painful. At your request. Then you start acting like you don’t know me.”

There was no volcano in any part of the world that could’ve looked more furious and spat more sparks than the woman standing in front of him. But he couldn’t let that sway him. “So, because you told me your life story I’m supposed to be your best friend?”

Lucy jerked back as if she’d been physically slapped.

For the first time in her life she thought about striking another person in anger. She clenched her teeth. Hitting him was the least of what she’d like to do. Run him over with a car, set him on fire, pull his fingernails out with pliers. Ooh, the man!

She was through being the peacemaker, the one who bent over to make everyone happy. “Look, you egotistical, arrogant man, I don’t expect you to be my best friend but what I do expect is for you to be civil.

“The staff has noticed how you treat me. I’ve been asked what I did to make you mad. For some reason, not obvious to me, you’re well liked. Your attitude towards me makes my job more difficult because the staff assumes I have done something wrong. I’m the new kid on the block so they’ll side with you.” She stopped long enough to take a breath.

When he opened his mouth to speak she held up a hand, stalling him. “What I want—no, demand—is that you show me the professional respect that I deserve. I will never make the mistake of believing that I’m anything other than a colleague you are forced to work with. Until we are told differently, I will do my job in the most professional manner possible and I expect the same from you.”

He took a step toward her. “Are you finished?” he said between clenched teeth.

She hesitated. “No. Actually, I’m not.” Her voice rose, which she almost never allowed to happen. “Fear not, I’ll never confide anything of a personal nature again to you.”

With that said, she turned and stalked out the door. Her hands shook and her knuckles had turned white where they were balled beside her. The clacking of her heels on the tile hallway matched the beat of her racing heart.

Boy, that had felt good. Liberating. She’d had no idea how much pain and anguish she’d kept bottled up. Maybe Ryan didn’t deserve the full blast of the

emotions she’d kept in check over the last few months. Heck, yeah, he did. He’d been a real jerk. The release had been freeing. She’d been stupid to ever think they could be friends.

It had been empowering. To let go for once. To fight for herself.

She would’ve dealt with her feelings about him backing away from her in private, but when it came into the patient care area she’d had to draw a line. Then she’d had to say something. She smiled. She’d lectured, more like.

Heading for her office, she passed a nurse who said, “Hi, Lucy.” She gave her a bright smile. The nurse gave her a funny look but returned Lucy’s smile. She was relieved to find her office empty. She didn’t want to discuss what had just happened with anyone while she was still feeling mad. If she did, the other person would be so surprised to know she had just told off the wonderful, charming, friend-to-all-the-nurses-and-patients Dr. Ryan O’Doherty. Haw!

That was, everyone but her.

Was she jealous because he didn’t treat her the same? No, that couldn’t be. Maybe it was. He had at least made it known that he appreciated her contributions in the last week. She had just read him wrongly. He didn’t like her. She could deal with that. What really annoyed her was that she liked him.

The light on her computer blinked, indicating she had a message. Tapping a key with more force than necessary, her email inbox opened. She scanned it. The message was from Mr. Matherson in HR. He requested that she and Ryan attend Jack Carter’s going-away party together as a sign that the co-ordinated patient care program was working.

“Great. Just great.” She was starting to agree with Ryan’s negative view of this program.

A new message came up. The address indicated it was from Ryan. She clicked. His terse message read: “Assume you received same email. Will pick you up at seven.”

CHAPTER FOUR

RYAN STEPPED ONTO the landing of the third floor above Volpentesta’s Restaurant and studied the glossily painted doors. Lucy’s response to his email had been “Third floor, red door.” That had been the sum total of their personal communication since she had stalked out of his office.