“That’s no better. Was Nikki . . . ?” He couldn’t bring himself to ask if a little girl—and a thirteen-year-old was definitely a girl—had been promiscuous.
“Sexually active?”
Gabe winced and nodded. It would be bad enough to think of such a young girl fooling around with boys her age, but those bikers Melanie had described to him had sounded like grown men.
“Her father’s abuse started in elementary school.”
Gabe swallowed the nausea rising up his throat. “And your parents hold that against her?”
“What?” Melanie blurted. “Of course they don’t. She put me in what could have been a very dangerous situation, and they never f
orgave her for that.”
“I’m sure it wasn’t intentional. She probably thought you’d like the attention, because she likes it.” He could understand wanting to protect a daughter at the expense of someone else, but the more he learned about Nikki, the more he wanted to protect her—not only from those who might hurt her, but from herself. Someone needed to. He realized that Melanie had been doing that long before he’d come along.
“I know it wasn’t intentional. I don’t think most of the things she does that hurt me are.”
“What kinds of things?” He took her hand, smiling as the diamond he’d bought only hours ago dug into his palm.
Melanie shrugged. “Things.”
“I thought we were going to be honest with each other. Trust each other.”
“She sleeps with my boyfriends. Not all of them.” There had been that one who’d turned her down.
“You don’t have to worry about that with me,” he said, lifting her hand and kissing the inside of her wrist. “I’m a one-woman man and you’re my one.”
She smiled, her eyes misty. “Am I stupid because I keep taking her back? She always worms her way back into my life no matter how hard I push her away.”
“I don’t think you’re stupid at all,” he said, pulling into the parking lot behind her apartment building and putting the car into park. He was glad he was finished driving so he could brush her hair out of her lovely face and kiss the worry out of her expression. “You have a generous heart, Mel. Enough for Nikki and for me, for your parents and for all our future children.”
She lowered her eyes, which surprised him. He figured she’d take that as a compliment.
“Gabe?” she said after a moment. “If that groupie’s baby turns out to be yours, I . . . I don’t think I can love it.” She grimaced as if she’d said she wanted to harm the child.
Gabe hadn’t given Lindsey or her unborn baby a single thought for days. “Will you be jealous if I love it?”
She looked up, and the turmoil in her hazel eyes cut him so deep, he felt it through his entire chest. She nodded and closed her eyes, sending a single tear coursing down her cheek. She dashed it away.
“I don’t know why I feel this way. It’s not the baby’s fault. And if it’s part of you . . .” She reached for the door handle and tried to escape the very uncomfortable conversation she’d initiated. Gabe grabbed her hand to make her stay put.
“Finish what you were going to say.”
“If it’s part of you, I should love it. I know I should. I just . . . can’t.”
Gabe wasn’t sure what to say to that. He felt no connection to Lindsey’s unborn baby, but he would be a good father to the child if it was his. He’d already told Melanie as much. He wasn’t going to take back that vow just to make her feel better, because he’d meant it. He had no doubt that she’d come around if his newborn baby was staring up at her. She wouldn’t be able to hold a grudge anything so innocent and pure. He knew she wouldn’t. But they’d cross that bridge if—and in his mind that was a big fucking if—they came to it.
“If that’s the way you feel . . .”
“But I hate feeling this way. I’m a terrible person for wishing a baby didn’t exist.”
“You’re not a terrible person,” he said. “You just have a terrible wish.”
She jerked free of his grasp and opened the door. She climbed out and slammed the door behind her, clutching her stomach and breathing hard, as if she’d just played Sole Regret’s set list with one drumstick. This was really tearing her up inside. He climbed out of the car and moved to stand beside her, pulling his cellphone out of his pocket and dialing Owen. The continually silent bassist didn’t answer Gabe’s call, so he left a message.
“Hey, Owen. I hate to ask anything of you at a time like this. I know you must be having a hard time with your brother’s situation.” God, Gabe felt like an ass for even bothering him. “I know it’s probably not something on your mind right now, but I was wondering when Lindsey is going to have that paternity test. I’d like to know if her baby is mine as soon as possible. I’m getting married, you see, and it’s something I need to know before I make this wonderful woman pledge her forever to me. So if you have any details on that test, please call or text. And if you need anything—absolutely anything—don’t hesitate to ask. I’m here for you. Take care, bro. I’ll stop in to see you when I get back to Austin in a couple days. And if you haven’t made up with Kellen yet—I still don’t know what he did—but for fuck’s sake, dude, give the guy a break. You know he’s your anchor. Always has been.”
Feeling stupid for leaving such a long and sappy message for a guy while Melanie listened in, Gabe disconnected the call and tucked his phone back into his pocket.
“I’m not sure if I should be glad or afraid that you did that,” Melanie said.
“I thought you wanted to know if the baby’s mine.”
“I do,” she said. “But what if I’m not ready?”
“Will you be ready in three months when the baby is born?”
She sucked in a laugh. “Probably not.”
“I don’t want this hanging over us. We need a plan of action.”
“I thought rock stars always went with the flow,” she said, linking her arm through his and tugging him toward the apartment.
He cocked his head to one side. “Have you met me?”
She laughed. “Fortunately, I have, and I never once took you for a rock star.”
For some reason her jest wiped the smile from his face.
*****
The next morning, Gabe filled the trunks and back seats of two cars with a bunch of what he considered useless girl stuff that would soon be cluttering up his house. He was a little cranky because his mattress-time with Melanie had been interrupted by Nikki forcefully inserting herself between them so she could sleep. This entailed her cuddling with Melanie, or rather, wrapping herself around Melanie like a starving python. There was no way in hell Gabe would put up with that bullshit when they reached Austin. If Nikki got scared in the night, she would just have to sleep with a pair of hot, smelly, slobbery, oft-times gassy Labradors.
“Are we stopping for breakfast?” Nikki asked, sweeping her hair back with the pair of white-rimmed sunglasses on top of her head.
“Not if we’re going to make it to Dallas by three,” Gabe said. That was when he’d told Adam to expect them, and Gabe wasn’t typically late for the appointments he made.
“But I’m hungry, and Melanie drank the last of the milk.”
“I asked you if you wanted some,” Melanie said, but she opened the trunk and rummaged around in bags until she came up with a box of granola bars. “Enjoy,” she said, handing a bar to Nikki.
Nikki immediately opened the wrapper and took a bite. “You’re riding with me, aren’t you?” she asked with her mouth full.
Gabe hid a self-satisfied grin. He’d deliberately crammed several heavy boxes, a thick comforter, and several extra pillows in the front seat of the Bug so Melanie would ride with him in her Toyota.
Melanie lifted a brow at her friend. “Would you ride with you if you had the chance to ride with him?” She jabbed a thumb in Gabe’s direction.
“Good point,” Nikki said. “I’ll ride with Gabe. You drive my car.”
For a second, Gabe thought Melanie was going to agree to that arrangement. He opened his mouth to protest, but Melanie said, “If this is going to work, you have to recognize that Gabe is my top priority. If you want to come, you will drive your car and I will ride with Gabe in mine, got it?”
Nikki crinkled her nose at Gabe, but took another bite of her granola bar and swung open the door of the Bug. “I’m stopping with you in Dallas,” she said as she climbed into her frivolous melon-orange car. Unlike Gabe, she actually looked good behind the wheel. “I want to say hey to Adam.”
She closed her door and started the car’s engine. Melanie knocked on the glass, and Nikki rolled down her window. “I’ll be careful.”