“That’s part of its magic!” joked Ryan. “Look, maybe in a few months, it won’t matter. The lockdown has to be over by then and then you can move on with your life.”
“I feel like it will be hanging over me forever.”
“It probably won’t.”
I sighed and wondered what other choice do I have than to hope this stranger was right?
It was weird that I was texting with him so much, but after all the pandemic weirdness, plus the weirdness between Ryan and me, nothing could surprise me on the “weirdness” factor anymore. It was nice to meet someone new and I was finally able to unburden my soul.Chapter Fifteen - TracianneWe’d been locked up for almost a month and the virus just kept getting worse. The president insisted we’d be back to normal soon, but it didn’t seem that way.
The governor was talking about keeping the state locked down past June and July. Maybe nothing would open until August and there might even be a second wave then.
All sorts of conflicting information was pouring in. The Internet had one set of information (well, several sets really) and the TV had another. They had been wrong about the masks. At first, they wanted us not to wear them. Now they demanded we do so.
At the same time, they were putting recovering patients into nursing homes, even though the elderly residents were at the greatest risk. It was like someone was purposely trying to make this whole thing as bad as possible.
What the hell were people thinking? It was a good thing I didn’t listen to much of the TV news anymore, as a way to preserve what little sanity I had left! Still, the conflicting reports made me stressed out and Dad didn’t seem to happy.
Daphne was, as always, on the verge of falling to pieces. I couldn’t help but that think the woman was as weak as a piece of straw blowing in the wind. How did she survive a divorce? My God, every time I looked in her direction, I could swear she seemed to be on the verge of tears.
Fortunately, even though life in the house was pretty miserable for us, I had made a new friend in Ryan. We talked all the time. It wasn’t anything sexual, but he was engaging and funny. I welcomed the diversion, especially since Phil still wasn’t talking to me at all.
“It’s so lame, everything coming out of the news,” I texted. “Wear a mask, don’t wear a mask…”
“No one’s wearing a mask here,” texted Ryan. “There are only like 400 people in my town, though. There are rarely more than ten of us together in one spot anyway.”
“So, no one you know has the virus?”
“I don’t think so,” he said. “People in the state do have it, but it’s a pretty low number. It’s mostly in the cities. Maybe 300 cases? No less than that.”
“Wow, it’s everywhere here,” I replied. “You’re so lucky.”
“Not really. There’s nothing much to do here. I go for long walks.”
“I like to go for walks, but I generally stick to a few block radius now. People are weird during the virus. They’re afraid to pass you on the street. Sometimes, they’re more afraid of you when you have the mask on, than off.”
“Strange. Is this world falling apart?”
“Maybe. I know a lot of people are out of work. I don’t see how everyone can survive very long like this, with or without being infected.”
“They should come out here to Alaska. We have work!”
“I can imagine. You must be shoveling snow constantly.”
“That’s not really work,” Ryan assured. “That’s just something you do to get to your car every morning. That is, if you have anywhere to go.”
“Well, you work, right?”
“No, I’m a student.”
“Me too. My classes were canceled.”
“Mine were canceled and the state is barely on lockdown here. It’s so weird.”
I wondered whether Ryan and I would be a good romantic match, but I couldn’t stop thinking about Phil. Even though I still wanted Phil, he didn’t seem to want me, and I kind of understood.
What we had done was weird and forbidden. But still, he had seemed really into it. I couldn’t imagine giving that up to try to date someone else.
I knew I shouldn’t go down that path with Ryan. He was all the way in Alaska. If I got my hopes up, they’d probably be dashed. Plus, with the lockdown, neither one of us was going anywhere.
And the worst part of it was that even if I did find out Ryan was interested in me in the way, since, so far, all of our texts had just been platonic and a way to pass the boredom, so it would be presumptuous to think he’d want something romantic with me, I didn’t think I could actually be attracted to him. I couldn’t stop thinking about anyone other than Phil.