"Pot, meet kettle. Kettle, meet pot," Kristen said with a smirk.
I felt a sudden and abiding empathy for the guys who had tried to start fights with me after I had been with their little sisters. Perspective could be a real kick in the head.
I went off to college the next month, Kristen's words of premature wisdom still ringing in my ears. It was the Spring session, so the clothing on the freshman females tended to be somewhat sparse. And the girls on campus all threw themselves at me just as the girls in high school had.
I just wasn’t interested, though. I kept my head down and tried to focus on school. I was majoring in business and would have a lot of work to do if I wanted to advance.
Grandpa had made clear his intention that I get at least an MBA. That was probably why he was paying my tuition. I was still too young to get at the trust fund that had been set up.
My family was rich, but I wasn't; all the money I had would be coming from them. I could be cut off at any time until I was age 21. They had set it up that way, 21 being the legal age of adulthood as people viewed it in my grandpa's day and he didn't see why they should have lowered it like they did.
That was one of the advantages of being in the position that he had gotten himself to. He had the power (and money) to inflict his will and morals on everyone else. One would never have known that he had grown up in a shack in the West Virginia hills. New money through and through.
I had big oxfords to fill and was determined not to let the family down. This was actually how grandpa had framed it. Like I would be some kind of traitor or disappointment or failure if I didn't do exactly what he did and what he wanted me to do.
It was probably what had driven my dad to fight with him, and what had driven me to rebel against both of them in high school. In college, I was trying to right the wrongs, but I was always treated with shame and anger.
There were moments, few and shameful but still there, that I was relieved that he was dead. Not happy but relieved to be able to get out from under his shadow and live my own life.
I got the feeling that dad sometimes felt the same way. He would have gotten it even worse than I did, having to live with grandpa growing up. I didn't know if Kristen ever felt like we did. Grandad never really paid her much mind.
I realized later that it was because she was a girl and, to his mind, of no real importance when it came to his legacy. He had his son and his grandson and that was all that mattered. He was sexist and played favorites like that.
If he was still alive, I probably would have punched him for some of the things I was figuring out now that he was gone. Of course, that would have just made him proud. I would have been just like him then. A domineering thug.
Still thoroughly under his thrall while in college, though, I focused hard on the course work, barely ever leaving my dorm room, except to eat. Even then, I brought my books with me to the cafeteria.
It was the opposite of how it was in high school. My grades had been so bad grandpa had to call in a favor to get me into the school he had wanted me to go to. Something else he was able to hold over me.
I lacked complete interest in women, not only because I was trying my best to study hard but also because I missed Kora. I told myself to get over her and that it couldn't be that way forever and eventually, I did start try to start dating again.
At first, they approached me, usually while I was in the cafeteria. Unlike my younger, wilder days, I did my best to stick to talking to one girl at a time, seeing if it would work out before I considered dating her.
It never did work out though and by the end of my first semester I had come to the realization that it wasn’t even worth trying to date. I simply had no interest and I told myself that maybe if I gave it a break, I would eventually get over Kora and be able to take a girl out.
It was during a lull in this chain of failed attempts to get myself psyched up to date, during a college break, that I messed up what I long thought had been my last chance with Kora. I had only been home a few days when Kristen, ever the socialite, decided to have a pool party to break in the new Olympic sized swimming pool dad had recently had put in the backyard, grandpa bribing the zoning inspector to make sure there were no land use issues.