I hadn’t seen Austin since he left for college when I was 14. We had never bonded. He was 4 years older than I was and our folks got married when I was 8. Of course, at the time, I thought Austin was the most amazing thing in the world which is probably why Austin thought I was the most annoying thing in the world.
I followed him and his friends everywhere I could and he would slam the door in my face or march me by the arm back to Mom and Dad while he called me a “baby.”
By the time I started my teens, I’d come to accept the simple fact that my stepbrother couldn’t stand me. So I just avoided him as much as I could and went on with my life.
We were just beginning to get to the point where we could talk to each other when he left.
When Mom and Dad insisted on dragging me halfway across the world to watch Austin graduate college I did everything I could to get out of it. I had just turned 18 and graduated from high school. I was looking forward to spending the summer hanging out with my friends. The last thing I wanted to do was go watch a boring commencement ceremony and then hang out with some boring nerd that I had nothing in common with.
Oh yeah. Austin is a total dork. I had terrible taste in men when I was eight.
Beyond Austin’s total romance hero name, he’s got about nothing to offer. Well, that’s not entirely true— he’s smart. He’s got like a 4.2 GPA or something, one of those losers who always does the extra credit assignments and fucks up the grading curve for everyone else. Austin is too tall— like 6 foot 5 or something, he’s skinny and he needs to get outside more. He’s just plain pasty. And that hair! Ugh. It’s not long, but it’s not short and he just sort of lets it hang in his face. He wears nothing but khakis and short sleeve shirts. And, of course, his whole nerd persona wouldn’t be complete without those wire rimmed glasses.
The plane ride took 6 hours in the air and a 3 hour overlay in Omaha. How Dad managed to book a flight that had a stop over in Omaha, I’ll never understand. Austin’s graduation was the weekend right after my high school graduation and all I could think of was how I was going to miss out on the trip to the lake with all my friends.
I’d helped plan the lake trip with my friends back in March. It was going to a really big deal. Mandy’s dad was letting everyone stay at his lake house. The house slept like 13 people and, of course, there’s always more room on the floor or to camp out on the deck or in the yard. At least count we had like 20 people who said they were going. Including Stephen.
My heart clenched at the thought of missing out on a chance to drink around the bonfire with Stephen. We’d had some hit and miss hook ups during high school, but nothing serious enough to make us a couple… and nothing serious enough to solve my virginity problem. I’d really been looking forward to a 3 day weekend at the lake with him to get that taken care of. But nooo… I have to get dragged to Nowhere New York to watch my stupid dork asshole brother change his tassel from one side to the other. What bullshit. Like Austin will even notice I’m there.
When Dad told me we Austin was going to school in New York, I thought Austin had gone off to a big, sparkly city with sky scrapers and taxi cabs. Who knew New York had so much space filled with absolutely nothing? This was so not the city.
This place was called Ithaca. I couldn’t help but think that “Ithaca” was perfect onomatopoeia— it sounded exactly like what it was. “Ick-it-a.” OK OK, it wasn’t that bad. But it was a far cry from the hustle and bustle one expects from New York, and no body ever talks about anything in New York except the city, so how was I supposed to know that most of the state was nothing but green hills and tiny little farm houses? Why on earth would anyone want to go to college out here? That was just like Austin— to pick some out of the way place where there’s nothing to do but study.
We got to the hotel we were staying at and got settled in. We were going to be here for almost a whole week. After the graduation thing, Austin had some sort of awards dinner that we had to go to and then Dad said we were going to help Austin pack up his apartment since he was going to be moving.
All I heard was “blah blah blah…you don’t get to hang out with your friends and do anything fun.” I didn’t even understand why I had to go to Austin’s stupid award ceremony dinner thing. Was he like, in grade school or something? Where he gets a little trophy for perfect attendance or something? And who the hell cares if he did? I mean, why did I have to go?
Well, maybe his mom cared. And Dad probably cared too, Dad was really proud of Austin, just like he was his real kid. But I didn’t understand why I had to go. Or why I had to get all dressed up for it.
It’s not that I minded going to some fancy shindig in a pretty dress, really. I just get so sick and tired of hearing all about how awesome Austin is. I never get any recognition for any of the stuff I do.
I mean— it’s not like I ever got great grades. I was lucky to get out of high school. School is just so not my thing. It’s not like it’s hard or anything, it’s just so….boring. And I’m not exactly planning on going to college in the fall. I just want to take some time off for awhile. Get a chance to explore the world around me and maybe figure out what I want to do for the rest of my life before I’ve already wasted the rest of my life doing something I hate since Mom and Dad have made it super clear that I should not expect to make a living on my artwork— I need a “real” job.
I don’t think that’s such a bad thing.
I know Mom and Dad would really like it if I had more “ambition” but I have all kinds of time for that later. It’s not like I’m a total slacker. Just because I didn’t graduate with honors or invent some sort of multi-billion dollar software company or something, doesn’t mean I haven’t accomplished anything.
When I was 9, I got an award for selling the most candy bars for the school fundraiser. But that was the year that Austin won the state science fair. Yeah, the state science fair. Who even knew there was a state science fair? Well— I do. Because my stepbrother won it. And that meant we all had to go to the national science fair. Which meant we had to miss my award ceremony for my candy sales.
When I was 14 I came in first for a local art show. But that was right before Austin graduated high school and Mom and Dad went with him to check out a bunch of colleges he’d been accepted to so no one made it to the gallery showing. No one ever even said congratulations to me about that. How many 14-year-olds get their own gallery showing? At least I was still in school and didn’t have to go with them that time.
I guess I understand. I mean, it’s not like any of my accomplishments will ever lead to a prestigious career making lots of money. Last time I paid any attention, Austin already had a bunch of really big offers for some gaming thing he was working on. He’ll probably be a billionaire before he’s 25 while I’m likely to end up sharing a one room apartment with 5 other people.
At least I’ll be happy following my dreams. Who knows if Austin is happy? He’s so busy overachieving how can he have time to be happy? I guess if external validation is what he thrives on, then he’s doing just fine. Everything is all about Austin.
We were supposed to get in earlier and have time to meet up with Austin before his commencement ceremony, but since the plane had gotten delayed we ended up cutting it really close. Austin didn’t have time to meet up with us before the graduation so we planned to see him afterward and go out to dinner together.
Naturally, Austin graduated with honors and that meant his family got preferred seating in the auditorium. So we got to sit in the first row, right in front of the stage.
I figured since he was one of the first graduates to get his degree, it would mean that we’d be able to leave after he walked. Of course not. Not only did Mom and Dad make me sit through the entire ceremony, they also made me put my cell phone away so I couldn’t text or check any social media while I was stuck in the theater for 2 1/2 hours.
Mom and Dad really wanted me to change my mind about college, but if they thought making me sit through a boring graduation ceremony was going to inspire me— boy! were they wrong. This was torture. It made me want to do anything but go to college.
The program said Austin was the second person who gave a speech in the very beginning, but when the super hunky guy in the black gown walked up to the podium, I had to double check the program.
It had Austin’s name but not his picture. I looked up at Dad and then at my stepmom, expecting to see disappointment in their faces when their pride and joy wasn’t actually the guy in the spotlight. Instead, they were just beaming with pride and Mom was taking video with her phone.
I looked back at the guy on stage.
That was not the Austin I remember. This guy was tall like Austin, but this guy was ripped. He had broad shoulders and I could almost taste the muscular arms that I could see coming out of the wide cuffs of the graduation gown.
This guy’s face was all chiseled angles, hard jaw covered by smooth skin. And his voice boomed from the podium. Rolling out from the stage in a deep tone like thunder.
Nothing like my brother. At least, not like the brother I remembered.
Holy hell! This guy was hot. Something about the tone of his voice made me feel all fluttery deep down low and I realized I was kinda squirming in my seat.