With my relief, I found myself blurting everything out, and when I stopped, I had to take in a breath. Grandma looked amused as she looked at me with her eyebrows raised. I blushed, dialing back on the excitement as I had some more ice cream.
“I can see it is a bit of a problem,” she said. “But not enough for you to give up everything, Zoe. Something will work out. I’ll support you no matter what, okay? Ben is a damn bully. He bullied your mom and kept her shackled all her life, you shouldn’t let him determine what happens in your future.”
“He did that?” I said, surprised.
Dad and Grandma didn’t exactly get along. Of course, that was the reason we never came to visit Grandma anymore after Mom was too sick to make the trip all the way out here, and I’d have to come by myself if I wanted to. I always wondered why, but could this be the reason?
“Yes, he did,” she said solemnly. “Your mom didn’t want to be a housewife, Zoe. She wanted to do something with her life, but your dad insisted on her staying home and taking care of you. She wanted a career, but he wouldn’t let her have it, said it was fine as long as he could provide her with everything. You shouldn’t let him do that to you, too, just like he did with your mom. Whatever you want to do, go ahead an
d do it.”
All this was news to me, but it wasn’t anything I could change now, anyway.
“There’s still the problem with the team’s policy, though. I don’t want to give Howard up, but the job...”
“If this position with the team is a problem, try talking to the owner again and explain things. If it doesn’t work out, then look for another position with another team. Not everything is going to be so black and white, Zoe. You’re thinking too hard. Just go with the decision you’re likely to regret the least for now.”
Was it really that easy? When Grandma said it, everything sounded so simple that I had to wonder what had me so stressed out I had to run away from home. Overwhelmed with emotion, I set my bowl down and reached my arms out to hug her.
“I love you, Grandma,” I whispered, a little chocked up, holding her tightly for a minute. “I want to keep the baby, no matter what, and I don’t want to raise him alone.”
She nodded in satisfaction. “That’s good. Now, the first thing you need to do, is tell the baby’s father. Tell him everything you told me, so you can make decisions together. Okay?”
I nodded, wiping at the tears that wanted to spill from my eyes. “I will, Grandma.”
Of course, I would tell Howard, I never had any intention of keeping it from him, but I wasn’t ready. Not yet.
Chapter Fifteen
Howard
Nearly two weeks. It had been two weeks since Zoe seemed to have disappeared, and I was starting to get really worried. Even when she shut me out when she wasn’t in the best mood, it was only for a few days, and she wouldn’t completely ignore me. The longest we went without even texting was when she first found out I had to avoid her, but back then, I still got to see her. This time, I wasn’t getting through to her.
Could something have happened to her?
I thought about asking Ben, but I was reluctant. He didn’t seem worried when I saw him yesterday that Zoe had failed to show up again. The first few times, he’d at least asked after her. Did he know where she was? Was I the only one she wasn’t talking to?
Fuck, did I do something wrong without realizing? Or... was she pulling away because I told her I loved her?
I knew I should have talked to her properly first!
If she was running scared because I said I loved her, then what did that mean? She’d said she felt the same way, but that couldn’t be true, could it? Was her disappearance her real answer? If only she would answer my texts or my calls and explain things, then I wouldn’t have to be this anxious.
My phone vibrated, and even though I knew it couldn’t be her, I scrambled off my bed and picked it up where I’d left it on my nightstand. Of course, it was just Grady asking if I’d be late to practice. I sat down in disappointment and sent him a quick text back, telling him I wasn’t well enough to come in. he didn’t ask any questions, just texted back saying I should feel better and get my ass to practice tomorrow. That got me to smile a little.
I hadn’t been pulling my best at practice. Ever since that disastrous first time I’d played while distracted, I had improved a bit, but not enough. After the near fight in the locker rooms, Grady had talked everyone down, and I was lucky no one held a grudge against me. He’d told me to do whatever I had to, as long as it didn’t take too long, to get my head screwed on straight before the practice match Ben planned to set with another local team in another couple weeks.
“Where do I start looking,” I murmured to myself.
She hadn’t been home. Since Mom had moved in with them, I’d asked and she’d told me that Zoe hadn’t been home the whole time. No way was I going to talk to Ben. What about her friends?
I groaned, rubbing my forehead. Her friends would be a problem, because I only knew of a few of them, and she’d only introduced me to one in passing. She was a short red head called Kayla. I didn’t have her number, I didn’t know where she worked, as for where she lived...
Besides, while I was skipping practice, it was the middle of the day. She’d be at work right now, so having her number and address wouldn’t be helpful immediately. I had time to look, though.
Wait...
I picked my phone up again and got into Facebook. Zoe had a page she rarely posted on, but she had a friends list. Maybe I could find Kayla if I checked there. It took a few minutes, but I did find her page. She was careful, though, there was nothing posted online that revealed anything about her personal life. I got distracted for a minute when I saw a picture on her page of her and Zoe. When I looked through the photos, I saw several more, including some that should have been from around the time Zoe was in high school.
Focus!