“We don’t even know where she is.”
“She works at Central General. It’s only a few hours away. It makes sense she would go into the city, anyway. There’s only one hospital here and it isn’t that big. A girl like Emma probably wouldn’t settle for that.”
“What, so now you’re an expert?”
“No. But I watched her back in high school, and you watched her about as much, if not more, than me. You know I’m right.”
Yeah. I kinda did. She deserved more, and she must have known that. So, I did something that was more like my brother than me.
I made an impulsive decision.
“Sure, let’s go. If we go now, we might make it there before traffic, find a place to stay before it’s dark. We’d probably have to wait till Monday, though.”
“Why say that?”
“If she was coming down for the weekend, it makes sense that she has the time off, right? She’ll probably report back on Monday.”
He frowned because he honestly hadn’t thought of it. I rolled my eyes at him, but he didn’t see it.
“Whatever. We’ll deal with that when it comes to it. We should take the car and go find her.”
Usually, I was the voice of reason. And I should have spoken up, said we couldn’t. Because technically, we were supposed to be resting before our next championship race in a few weeks’ time. But I met my brother’s eyes and agreed with him completely because we both had something dirtier in mind.
Resting up could be interpreted in so many ways.
Chapter Twelve
Emma
Saturday night and I was in my home instead of at my mom’s. Well, I said home even though it was a tiny apartment that couldn’t fit me and a pet, but I’d found the place while still in college and never moved. It was just as well because it was close to the hospital.
My phone rang, and for a moment, my heart leaped in my chest. Until I remembered that there was no way they had my phone number. They didn’t ask for it, and I didn’t give it to them. I cursed myself for a moment, for not giving into my idea to leave my number in one, or even both, of their phones.
Then I sighed, disappointment following quickly behind my waning excitement as I went to grab my phone. I was supposed to be making dinner, but I didn’t feel like anything, and my groceries were very low, anyway. I had a few cups of yogurt, so I could probably just have that. I had to remember to go shopping for real food, though. I’d end up starving and it would just leave me more depressed.
I grabbed a small cup of yogurt from my fridge as I rushed to my phone. I saw the name on the screen before I answered, and though I wasn’t quite as excited as before when I thought it was the twins calling, I was still happy.
“Hey, Brandi. What’s up?”
I didn’t tell my friend I was going home to visit my mom. Usually, even though the trips came frequently-ish, they were never really planned for. The soonest I had free time, I’d get up and go. Just as well I hadn’t told her, or she’d have been wondering why I was back so soon, and I didn’t want to get into it.
“Hey, Emma. I wanted to ask if I can come over?”
I didn’t even ask why. “Please. I would be happy for the company, you have no idea.”
There was silence over the phone, making me think I’d come off a tad too strong. Brandi was my closest friend—my only friend, really—and she had this uncanny sense of knowing when something was wrong with me.
“Okay, spill. What happened that I should know about?”
I sighed, putting the yogurt down as I sat at my tiny kitchen table. “I don’t even know where to start.”
“When you say that, you know I’ll just tell you to start at the beginning.”
“I know. But it’s not something I can talk about on the phone. And it would take too long, anyways.”
There was a pause. “Fine. You better be prepared to spill all the details. I’ll bring over some ice cream, okay?”
I groaned, even though it was clearly a bribe. “Brandi, you are an angel.”
She laughed at me. “Not quite, but it’s nice that you think so. Give me twenty minutes, half an hour, tops. Bye.”
“Bye.”
I looked at the cup of yogurt I hadn’t opened yet in my hand. Ice cream was technically not food, yogurt was at least more filling. I suddenly had a craving for ice cream, though. I put the cup back in the fridge, and got some bowls and spoons, that I set on the table and waited for Brandi.
There was a knock on my door twenty minutes later, and I went to let my friend in. She held up the shopping bag, while plastic, and I could see the big tub of ice cream in it. I took it from her, closed the door behind her, and led the way back to my little kitchen, where we sat at the table that incidentally sat only two comfortably if that.
I pulled the tub out of the plastic bag, set it on the table and popped the lid open. Then I spooned some into both bowls and sat on one side, letting Brandi take the other chair. She waited for me to get settled before starting in on the questions.
“So, why don’t you tell me what happened?”
“Can’t we just sit here and eat delicious ice cream and pretend nothing is wrong?”
She just stared at me until I sighed.
“Fine.” I took a spoonful of ice cream, let it melt in my mouth, then swallowed. “So, I went to my Mom’s this weekend.”
She looked surprised at the blunt statement. “Why didn’t you tell me you were going?” she frowned. “In fact, you never tell me when you’re going. I just find out that you went, or I don’t.”
“It’s not that big a deal, Brandi. And I don’t tell people because I usually just decide last minute, get in the car and drive over, sometimes every two months when I’ve got free time.”
“And what happened? Going to see your mom can’t be a bad thing.”
Oh, if she only knew. I just ate some ice cream until her face contorted into a frown.
“What did your mother do?”
I didn’t really want to talk about it, but I kind of did want to talk to someone. I never had before, the few people I mentioned my mom to thought we were just fine, if a little distant. But I’d known Brandi since the third year of college. If there was someone I trusted, it was her.
“So, my mom and I aren’t exactly the best of friends.”
“I gathered that. Just stop stalling and speak.”
I stabbed my spoon into the ice cream, watching it melt into a liquid instead of taking any more.
“I’ve always known my mother wasn’t my biggest fan, but I was still surprised.” I circled the spoon over the top, encouraging it to melt. “How my mom treated me… it was just bad. I don’t know if I can say it was worse than it’s ever been, or if I’ve been wearing rose colored glasse
s for a while without really noticing. Or maybe she’s not right in the head and I’m dodging a bullet because I am never going back home.”
It was a vow; one I knew I would keep. I should have felt something, maybe sad, but again, I didn’t feel anything. If I was being honest with myself, it hadn’t been home in a long time. I didn’t hate my mother, I liked her just fine when she wasn’t around. I would mourn her when she passed away, but every time I got near her I just got so close to hating her, it was scary.
“I agree that your mom is not right in the head. Any other mom would be proud of their daughter.”
Well. Not entirely.
I thought back to the night with the twins, feeling a mix of guilt and shame, very little, though, and mostly pleasure.
“There was something that happened Friday night. Besides Mom and me arguing again.”
Her lips curled in a grin. “I know that look on your face. You had a little fun, didn’t you?”
“I wouldn’t call it little.” I swallowed more ice cream and cleared my throat. “Well, them. I wouldn’t call them little.”
Brandi watched me, frozen, for a second. Then she put her spoon down in her bowl and folded her arms.
“Explain.”
My lips twitched for a minute, then I giggled, giddy.
“It was the most amazing night of my life, Brandi, you have no idea.” I knew I was gushing, but I couldn’t help myself. I wasn’t the kind of girl that gushed, about anything, but I felt it was warranted.
“Don’t you dare tell me you went to bed with two hot studs when I was at home and bored out of my mind?”
Her warning just made me laugh.
“I won’t tell you, then,” I teased, pressing my lips together.
“You better tell me what is going on before I take my ice cream back,” she threatened, making me laugh again.
“All right. Picture this. You’re in high school, very low on the social hierarchy. And there are these two guys, brothers—twins—and they were both voted as prom king in their senior year because people couldn’t tell who was who.”
Her jaw dropped. “No way. Twins? Hot ones?”
I smiled, a little smug. “Yup, blond, and blue eyes built body; pretty amazing everywhere.”