“Kevin?” I asked, trying to remember his name. I had talked to him on a few occasions, but I didn’t know him well.
“I didn’t know you lived here,” he said.
I wasn’t sure if he was being sarcastic or earnest. He furrowed his brow and pushed his dark rimmed glasses up his nose at the same time.
“I didn’t know you lived here,” I parroted, laughing nervously. I wasn’t sure how to play this off. He must have known that Damon lived in this building. I wasn’t sure if I was playing if off smoothly, or lying myself into a corner.
“I don’t live here,” he scoffed. “I was visiting my older sister and her husband. There’s no way I could even begin to afford a one bedroom in this place.”
“Oh, yeah, huh,” I muttered, working on an exit strategy. “Well, I’ve got to run. I’ll see you in sessions tomorrow.”
I practically ran out of the building, my heart pounding in my ears. I grabbed the first cab I could get, nearly walking through traffic in the process. I muttered my address to the driver and slunk back into my seat. Back to reality.
Would Kevin make the connection between Damon and me? If he did, would he cause a scene? Ordinarily, it might not be a huge deal, especially if it would be hard to prove, but Damon was gearing up to give me the surgical internship. If Kevin suspected anything, he could easily get the both of us into trouble.
I really didn’t want to text Damon so soon, but this was an emergency. With my fingers trembling, I typed out a quick message and prayed for a fast response.
I saw one of the interns in your lobby. I think it’s pretty obvious I don’t live here. What do I do?
I took ten deep breaths as I waited for the response. I jumped as the phone buzzed in my hands.
Calm down. I’m sure it’s not a big deal. How would he know you were there to see me? What did you say?
I don’t know. I just kind of panicked and mumbled a bunch of stuff. There was a picture of you standing outside of your building on the cover of United Airlines’ magazine.
This time, it took a few more minutes to get a response. I was feeling queasy.
Chill out. I don’t even really know any of the interns this session. It’s going to be fine. Don’t worry about it. Just think of me, and how much I rocked your world this weekend.
I wasn’t particularly reassured by this, but I had no other option but to wait until sessions tomorrow and see what happened. There was no point in him telling me to chill out. That just wasn’t in my nature.
Back at my apartment, I was too worried to even remember that I promised Carol I would tell her everything. She grabbed me as I went to my room and basically sat on me until I spilled all of my secrets. I gave a linear retelling of my weekend, starting with some details about Friday’s dinner and ending with our soak in the hot tub earlier that morning.
“I can’t believe this,” Carol said in shock. “My little Olivia is having an affair with the sexy, rich, playboy surgeon!”
“Ugh, I don’t think it’s an ‘affair’, really,” I groaned. “He’s only a few years older than us. And, it’s not like he’s attached to anyone else.”
“It’s scandalous and I want to hear more,” she gushed. “I don’t know if I approve of your choice of mate, but it sure makes for interesting stories. Is he good to you?”
“Yeah, he’s been great, actually. I’ve had a good time with him. It’s too bad it’s over.”
“What?” Carol squawked. “But I need more stories! How am I going to get through the rest of this residency without some entertainment?”
I half-smiled. “Sorry. I just don’t know if it’s a good idea to keep seeing him like this. We could get caught.”
“Do you like him?” she sang.
I chewed my lip. My first instinct was yes— I did like him. But, I was afraid to admit it to anyone, even my close friends.
“You do, don’t you?” she squealed.
I sighed loudly. “I don’t know. I just don’t know what to think. I think I like him, but then I don’t think anything more will come of this. It can’t, right? Before long, I won’t be a resident anymore. There won’t be any excuse to see him. Besides, he’ll move on from me eventually.”
Carol held up her hand to silence me. “I didn’t ask if you guys were going to get married at the end of your residency and move in together. I’m just asking if you like him.”
“Yeah, I think so,” I said shakily.
She grinned. “This is too rich. You’ve got to hang out with him again.”
“I’ve got to study,” I said, getting up from my seat. I had an uneasy feeling in my stomach again at the thought of being in class with Damon and Kevin. I had too many distractions already. I didn’t really need the threat of being fired before finishing my residency added on top of that.
“Sure,” Carol giggled, “I’m sure you’re just going to call your boyfriend.”
I rolled my eyes at her. I didn’t have the energy for anything else. I curled up on my bed and tried to push out all of the bad feelings with good memories. My mind went to how we cuddled on the couch together, watching TV and talking about nothing in particular. It had all been so nice while it lasted.
Chapter 19
Olivia
I didn’t speak to Damon again until I saw him in sessions. This time, I sat closer to the front in an attempt to act natural. I raised my hand a few times to speak during the conversation, but other than that, tried not to speak directly to Damon. I didn’t smile excessively or look at him more than anyone else did. And, though I wanted to wear something cute to show off for Damon, I put on what we had to wear, our scrubs and white coats.
That didn’t mean that there weren’t other things on my mind. While he spoke about medical procedures, I was hardly listening to, I kept imagining him in the nude. I wondered if I could ever look at Damon clothed and not imagine him in the buff. He truly had a magnificent body.
Sessions seemed to drag on forever. I wanted to get out of there so I wouldn’t have to keep up with the charade any longer. While I liked being in Damon’s presence, it was exhausting to pretend as if I was indifferent to the whole experience.
“I’ve collected your papers and I’ll be grading them in the following week or two,” Damon announced to the class. “Don’t bother asking me if I’m going to choose you as the winner, because I’ll probably go ahead and disqualify you for bugging me about it. I’m not just judging this paper, I’m also judging your performance during rounds. Whoever I think has the best work ethic and ambition to succeed in the surgical field, will be the winner of the internship. The winner must accept the offer within three days of the prize. If the winner rejects the internship, I will prepare the runner-up. This internship is actually a paid position, and that is why it’s so coveted. There are other internships available, here at CUIMC, and those of you who don’t get this one will need to apply for the others. Please remember that while you will be paid, you will not be paid very much, because it is a learning position. That’s just how these things work. Any questions?”
Kevin raised his hand. My stomach lurched.
“How can you be so sure you’re hiring based of the strength of the paper alone and not incorporating any bias?”
Damon furrowed his brow, a look of confusion on his face. “I’m going to choose the best one and that again with how you perform during rounds, will help me to decide. None of you have proven yourselves to be total idiots yet, so I don’t think you need to worry about any bias. Anything else?”
He looked around the room. No one replied.
“Cool. Again, I’m required to tell you that I have office hours this afternoon. I’m not technically discouraging you to come, but if you do, remember that it will be after surgery, and while I am looking over all these papers. I will remember who interrupts me. If possible, send me an email and I’ll get back to you when I have time. You’re dismissed for rounds.”
I was fairly certain that he gave me a direct look when he tal
ked about office hours. I wondered if it was supposed to be a clue that I was supposed to meet him, or a hint that I should stay the hell away and not try anything with him.
We filed out of the conference room. A few students went to the front of the room to talk to Damon, but I kept walking, pretending to check emails on my phone. I walked to the nurses’ station, hoping that I put on a convincing performance. I knew it was all in my imagination, but I couldn’t help but feel like other people were watching me.
Toward the end of my rounds, I got a text from Damon, telling me to come to his office hours. He told me to wear something sexy like last time, but I didn’t think that was a good idea. If anyone saw me walking around in scrubs all day, but something short and tight for office hours that would be sure to raise some red flags.
Not having much time between today’s rounds and office hours, I hurried back to my apartment and swapped out my sports bra and plain underwear for something a little sexier. If I had to wear scrubs, I at least wanted my undergarments to be sexy.
Sneaking around was thrilling. I was nervous about getting caught, but the forbidden aspect of it was a little arousing. I quietly knocked on the door to the conference room before letting myself in.
“I’m glad you’re here,” Damon said, closing his laptop. “I’ve been meaning to talk to you about your grades.”
I frowned. “Really?”
He nodded. “Yes. I’m afraid you’re not taking this session very seriously. Your grade has been slipping and it’s looking like you won’t graduate without an A in this class.”