The End of Faking It

His anger deepened because he wanted her to be over it and feel free to fall in love again. Preferably with him.

In the evening at his apartment she was the same smiling flirt, teasing him, talking it up—the banter that, while fun, didn’t go deep. He had to bite the inside of his lips, bursting inside to ask her what had happened. Desperate to know where her heart was at now. But he wanted her to offer it, not to have to force it.

She let him lie between her legs, all warm and impishly malleable, smiling at him delightfully. It wasn’t enough.

He kissed her tenderly. As if she were one of the fragile flowers she said she didn’t like.

‘Don’t.’ She frowned and swept her hands across his back. He knew she was trying to hurry him.

‘Don’t what?’

‘Be so nice.’

He carefully studied her. ‘You think you don’t deserve someone being nice to you?’

She just closed her eyes.

And then he didn’t even pretend to let her take the lead. He dominated. Intensely focused on making love to her. It was about more than just giving her pleasure, but about bringing her closer to him any way he could.

Afterwards he lay holding her sealed to him, refusing to let her wriggle even an inch away, telling her more about his work in Melbourne. Stupid stories about his youth. Trying to grow the connection between them. To build trust. Blindly hoping she might talk back.

But all she did was listen.

CHAPTER NINE

CARTER took a taxi to Mason. He had the files; the job was done. In theory, after this meeting, he was free to fly out. But he couldn’t bring himself to book a ticket.

The old man had aged more in the last week than he had in the last ten years. Guilt squeezed Carter—he should have been to see him sooner. But Penny had been making daily visits with paperwork and sundry items. Even so.

‘I’ve got the information you need.’ He dragged out a smile and put the small packet of printouts on the dining table. ‘It’s all there. Once spotted, the pattern is pretty obvious.’

‘I knew I could rely on you.’ Mason sank heavily into his favourite chair.

‘Get in your auditors. It won’t take much to sort it out.’

‘He’ll have to be prosecuted.’

‘Yes.’ Carter nodded. ‘But I think the impact will be minimal because we caught him.’ He tried to put the best spin on it. ‘And quickly too. If anything the investors should be impressed at the efficiency of your system checks.’

‘It was instinct, Carter.’ Mason shook his head. ‘Just a feeling.’

‘Well, you’ve always had good instincts, Mason.’

‘And now my instinct is telling me I’ve failed.’

‘In what way?’ Surprised, Carter nearly spilt the coffee he was pouring.

‘That company is my life.’ Mason stared past him to the big painting on the wall. ‘And in the current climate it could have been swept away so quickly if this had got out of hand. It makes me wonder what’s going to be left after I’m gone. It’ll probably be bought out, the name will go. It’ll be finished.’

Carter inhaled deeply. Mason had long been his mentor. He’d admired the dedication, the drive, the single-minded chase for success. And there had been huge success. ‘You’ve already built an amazing legacy, Mason.’

Mason lifted his arms. ‘What is there? A house? A few paintings that will be auctioned off? Where are the memories? Where’s the warmth?’

The unease in Carter’s chest grew. Mason’s wife had died early on in their marriage—before they’d had time to have kids. And Mason had buried his heart alongside her. As far as Carter was aware there hadn’t been another woman—totally unlike his father. Until now Carter had always respected Mason more for that. But now he wasn’t so sure—not when he was confronted with Mason’s obvious regrets. And loneliness. Another lonely person. ‘You’ve given so much to charity, Mason. You’ve helped so many people.’

‘Who have their own lives and families.’ Mason sighed. ‘I shouldn’t have been such a coward. I should have tried to meet someone else. But I just worked instead.’

‘And you’ve done great work. You’ve employed lots of people, you helped lots of people.’ That was a massive achievement.

But personally fulfilling? Yes and no.

‘How’s Nick?’ Mason asked.

Carter’s grin flashed before he even thought. ‘He’s a little dude.’

‘Your father is a braver man than me. I regret not having a family. I regret devoting all my life to accumulating paper.’

‘Hey.’ Carter leaned forward and put his hand on Mason’s arm. ‘You have me.’

Mason said nothing for a bit, just stirred the milk in his coffee. Then he set the teaspoon to the side. ‘Is everything else at the office okay?’

‘Penny has it all under control.’

‘Told you she was an angel.’

Carter winced through a deep sip of the burning-hot coffee. ‘Yeah.’

A broken angel.

He sat back in his chair and settled in for the afternoon. He’d hang with Mason. He needed the time out to think.

Penny had been desperate for Carter to return from Mason’s—he’d gone to hand over what tricks he’d found but he’d been gone for hours and, being a complete Carter addict, she was antsy with unfulfilled need. Resenting the waste of the precious few minutes she had left. Finally he showed up, just as she was about to pack up and go to her own flat and cry.

So she went to his apartment instead. She had no shame, no thought of saying no. They only had a night or two left, and she wanted every possible moment with him. Because she wasn’t thinking of anything beyond the present moment. She couldn’t let herself.

He was unusually quiet as they walked into the apartment building. Maybe it hadn’t gone well.

‘Was Mason okay?’ She finally broke the silence.

His shoulders jerked dismissively. ‘Pleased with getting the result.’

Okay. He didn’t just look moody, he sounded it too. Once inside, he tossed the key on the table and turned to look at her.

Wow. She walked over to him—obeying the summons. She tiptoed up and kissed his jaw. Did he want her to take the lead this time?

It seemed so. She kissed him full on the mouth—teasing his lips with her teeth and tongue. His eyes closed and she heard his tortured groan. It thrilled her—maybe this was her chance to make him shatter. Was he tired and needy and impatient? The thought excited her completely because sh

e ached for him to want her so badly he lost all his finesse. Quickly she fought to free him from his clothes. Oh, yes, he wanted her—she could feel the heat burning through him. But his hands lifted and caught hers, stopping her from stroking him.

‘Matt called by the office yesterday.’ He all but shouted in her ear.

She pulled back to look at him. ‘He did?’

‘Passing by on his way to the airport.’

‘Oh.’ She was sorry she’d missed him. She had to do better at staying in touch. She’d text him later.

‘We had a little chat.’

‘Did you?’ Little goose bumps rose on her skin—because Carter’s expression had gone scarily stony.

‘He said you’re looking better than when he saw you in Tokyo. And way better than you did years ago.’

She blanched at the bitter tone in his voice.

‘You’ve put weight on, Penny. Not taken it off.’

‘Oh, don’t, Carter.’ She turned away from him.

‘What, speak the truth?’ He laughed roughly. ‘Penny, what on earth is going on?’

‘Nothing.’

‘You lied to me. You said you were overweight as a teenager. But you weren’t, you were a walking skeleton.’

‘Does this really matter?’

‘Yes, it does.’

‘Why?’

‘You’ve been using me this whole time to get off. To hide from whatever nightmares it is that you have.’

And what was so wrong with that? It wasn’t as if he’d been offering anything more. ‘I thought the whole point of this was for us to get off.’

‘Yeah, well, if it’s only orgasms you want, Penny, get yourself a vibrator.’

Oh, that made her mad. She turned back, found him less than an inch away—so ran her hand down his chest.

He jerked back. ‘I’m not interested in being your sex toy.’

‘Really?’ She reached forward and cupped his erection. ‘Maybe you’d better tell your penis that.’

‘I can control it.’ He stepped away. ‘If you want to get off, why not go find someone else? Any of those analysts in the office will stand for you. Hell, you could have all of them at once if you want.’