I slow-blink, sliding her juice across the table to her. “Why do you think that?”
“Mom and Gran. I heard them talking.”
I rub my jaw. I can sugarcoat the truth for Marissa like Kendra does, like I used to. Or I can be honest and teach her a valuable lesson she’s never had to learn—money doesn’t appear from thin air. It has to be earned. “Marissa, I don’t want you to worry about me. I’m not broke.” Not yet anyway. “I will always take care of you.”
“And Mom?” she asks, peeking up at me.
“And Mom,” I agree. “At least as long as it’s court mandated.”
“What?”
“Never mind. My point is this: Gran and Grandpa have money because Grandpa worked very hard to earn it. He was good at what he did and he went to work every morning until nighttime.” I have to pause to keep from gritting my teeth. It’s all true, but I have little respect for Kendra’s father, who reminds me of my old boss when I worked on Wall Street. Anything for a buck, no matter who it affected. “So,” I continue, “that hard work made him money, and that’s why Gran and Gramps are rich.”
“You work hard,” she says. “I know you do. I saw you go to work every day when you lived at home and it was always nighttime when you got back.”
I put my elbows on the table. “Yeah, but I didn’t like my job. For most people, that’s okay, but I want to love what I do. So I started over, which means it’ll take me longer to get back to making money.”
“I’m sorry,” she says.
I smile. “You’re not in trouble. I’m just trying to explain to you about money. You’ve always had it because of Gran and Grandpa, and I know your friends have it too. But not everyone does, babe. Some kids, most kids, would never even dream of owning a horse. When I was your age, I had to mow lawns in my neighborhood and give my parents the money I made to buy groceries.”
She widens her eyes. “You didn’t have food?”
“We did,” I say. “Because your Grandpa Frank had a steady job, and I pitched in.” Marissa doesn’t see Kendra working, and Marissa’s grandpa is recently retired. I pinch her nose with my bacon-greasy fingers to ease the wrinkles in her forehead. “Don’t worry. I promise, we’re all going to be fine. I just want you to go home and think really hard about whether or not you need that horse, and if you can’t live without it . . .”
She bounces in her seat. I guess she knew I’d give in one way or another.
“Ask Gran for one for Christmas.”
She giggles. “All right.”
Once Marissa’s fed, I put her in front of Netflix. “I’m going to make sure all your stuff’s packed,” I tell her.
“It is,” she says, eyes glued to Fuller House.
I head down the hall to my room and knock softly before opening the door. Halston is seated on the edge of the bed, her knees drawn up to her chin. Thankfully, she’s pulled my t-shirt over her legs, blocking anything of interest, or I’d be in trouble.
“You’re awake,” I say. “How do you feel?”
“A little hungover.” She glances behind me. “I was going to shower, but I didn’t want to make noise.”
“Kendra’ll be here any minute, so I’m going to get Marissa’s things and take her downstairs. Get some water from the fridge. You know where the shower is.”
She smiles with closed lips. “Is it still okay that I’m here? Or do you want me to go?”
I close the door behind me and walk over to her. When her text woke me last night, I’d panicked. I was sure she’d come in here, find Marissa, and run for the hills. Halston is only twenty-five. She doesn’t need to get involved with a man who has an eight-year-old kid. But, selfishly, I didn’t want to turn her away. Luckily, her drunkenness had given me an excuse to make her stay.
“The weekend’s just starting,” I say. “If you go now, I’ll be extremely upset.”
She bites her bottom lip. “Extremely?”
“I’ve slept next to you twice and kept my hands to myself.” Lifting her chin with my knuckle, I free her lip with my thumb to lean in and kiss her. “I don’t want to keep my hands to myself anymore. When I get back up here, be ready.”
She shivers, actually shivers, and grips the hem of the t-shirt in two fists. “I’ll be waiting.”
Her words go directly to my cock, her gaze even dropping for a split second. I leave the room to avoid a boner that’ll make my encounter with Kendra very awkward.
With her overnight bag in tow, I take Marissa out front. A shiny, black Audi S3 idles at the curb. Kendra gets out of the passenger’s side. I give Kendra’s boyfriend a cursory wave. He’s been a source of contention between us since Kendra introduced him to Marissa five weeks after their first date. Seemed to me Marissa shouldn’t’ve been meeting anyone I hadn’t met. But I have no problem with him as a person.
“How was the show?” I ask.
She takes Marissa’s bag. “Fine. I just can’t believe you forgot.”
“Oh, okay. We’re still on this.” I squat down to Marissa’s level. “Thanks for coming over, sweetie. I’ll see you in a couple weeks?”
She frowns. “Did you forget, Dad?”
“Of course not.” I glare daggers up at Kendra. “Mom’s just teasing. Go get in the car.” I kiss her on the forehead.
When she turns and walks away, I stand. “I’m not naïve enough to think you don’t make me the bad guy when I’m not around, but don’t ever do that to me while she’s standing here.”
“I show up at your door last night, and you look completely shocked. What father forgets one out of the four nights a month he gets with his daughter?”
“Five nights,” I correct.
“No. Last night counted as one of your days.”
“When you asked for this favor, you called it an extra night.”
“That was when I thought I was doing you a favor by giving you more time with your daughter. Apparently, I was just shitting on your weekend plans—”
“That’s bull.”
“So I changed my mind.”
“Come on, Kendra.” I rub my temples with one hand. I don’t need this headache right before I spend my first weekend with Halston. “You’re going to make me split up my weekend with her? You’re turning me into a deadbeat dad against my will.”
“Don’t start that shit again. I’m not the reason we got divorced. This victim act is getting old.”
“I’m just saying, you’re punishing me for wanting to spend time with my daughter. That’s not fair.”
“And you’re the authority on fair, Mr. Fucking Adultery?”
I take a step back. Kendra has too much control over this situation, and engaging her in an argument can only hurt me. “I’m not going to fight with you again. I’ll see you next time.”
I head back into the building. Kendra just wants to hurt me, but Marissa suffers too. If Kendra really thought I didn’t want time with Marissa, she’d probably have Marissa here every weekend. If I hadn’t worried how the judge might take it, I’d have considered asking for no time at all to get the reaction I wanted from Kendra.
I left that Connecticut life behind because I felt helpless going to a job I hated every day and returning to a wife I didn’t love. But I’m just as helpless now. I don’t have a steady income or much say in how my daughter’s raised. When I tried to tell Kendra it was too early to introduce Marissa to her boyfriend, she threw Sadie in my face. Marissa met Sadie once in the hallway between our apartments. Kendra was there; she knows it was an accident and that Marissa had no idea who Sadie was.
The sliver of light in all of this is Halston. It’s the first time I’ve had someone to revive me after one of Kendra’s soul-sucking sessions. Halston doesn’t treat me like a pawn or an ATM. The way she looked up at me from the bed moments ago, eyes wide, cheeks pink, lips parted, is what it means to be a man. Her man. She’s a girl I want to turn into a woman, and I want to start now. I’ve been aching for this since I opened her journal.
I burst
into the apartment and head straight for my bedroom. The shower is on. Perfect, since I plan on doing dirty things to her.
I stop at my nightstand for a condom, nearly breaking off the handle when I yank the drawer open. I peel off my t-shirt and step out of my sweats before entering the bathroom.
Halston turns quickly, covering her breasts. “Finn? What—”
I tear the condom packet open with my teeth. “I told you to be ready.”
She keeps her hands where they are. “I’ll only be another minute.”