“My fate?”
“The more part. There are other things I found out…”
“Give me a minute.”
She felt the biggest sense of impending doom she’d ever felt. She had no idea what he was about to say but she had a horribly vivid sense of déjà vu. She knew it was big. She knew it was bad. She knew she needed a minute before she could hear it. She’d been harassing him to tell her shit but now she didn’t wanna fucking know.
“I’ll stop. You’ve had more than enough for one day. We’ll go to Adrian’s compound tomorrow morning. We’ll talk more about it there.”
He spent the next while pacing, fidgeting, looking out the window, stepping into the hall or the bathroom and making phone calls. Kyla didn’t have it in her to harass him about the evident secrecy.
She curled up in the bed with the remote control and tried to get her head together. She felt gross. She couldn’t let her brain think too hard on Liam being interrupted in the act of rape. She couldn’t think too hard on what Tristan had said so far. Her mind was whirling. Hard. Fast. She wanted to vomit it all out, to rid her body of all of it.
Even though Liam didn’t get all that far, she still felt invaded, so thoroughly invaded. He’d touched her, started to violate her sexually, and he’d taken her blood. And it didn’t feel remotely like it did when Tristan had done the same thing.
But why?
Tristan had fucked her after she said No. Tristan drank from her regardless of whether she wanted it. But it was different. It sounded totally stupid but in her core she knew it was different because she felt like she belonged to him. On some weird deep level, she felt like she’d always belonged to him.
Tristan ordered in some Chinese food delivery but she only ate a little. He talked her into finishing soup and some stir-fried vegetables as she stared at the TV listlessly, trying to ignore his pacing and fidgeting.
When it finally got dark and she got under the covers to sleep, he climbed in with her and held her close.
“Maybe I should say I’m sorry you ever met me but not gonna lie,” I could never be sorry we met. But I am sorry for what he did. I’m so fucking sorry I left you vulnerable. I should’ve prepared for that, wish I could’ve had a vampire army prepared to fend him off, but I didn’t want any vampires near you. He must have had an army of people watching for me to find you that fast after we took that charter. Fuck. I bet you wish you’d never met me…”
She wrapped her arms around him and said, “No. How could I wish you away? We met for a reason. I refuse to believe that it was so you could destroy me. You broke down my wall and gave me beautiful sensations and emotions. I refuse to believe that it’s just so I can feel pain. I know there’s more and I don’t know what else there is and I don’t want to know tonight. I’ve waited this long, I can wait one more day. Tell me tomorrow. I do know that I feel something I never ever fathomed I could feel. We have to fight for our happily ever after, Tristan. I don’t know what it looks like but I believe it’s worth fighting for.”
“There were reasons we met, absolutely. But that’s part of the problem. And it is worth it. I will do everything in my power to find a way,” he said with conviction. “I’m sorry I made you vulnerable and I’m sorry that he did what he did to you. I want to undo it. Cover it. Make it a memory and then erase it. Right now I wish I could entrance you for just five minutes so that I could make you forget what he did. I know I can’t but as soon as possible, I’ll do everything I can to help you forget, help erase his mouth on your throat, his body touching you. I’ll erase it because he won’t exist any more. He doesn’t exist for you now. Okay?”
“Tristan?”
“Yeah?”
“Instead of turning me, what if you get me pregnant,” she whispered.
“Kyla…” His voice held not a shade of anything good.
“Hear me out. If I’m ovulating despite multiple types of birth control then I will start bleeding again soon if I don’t get pregnant. That’s a given. Right?”
He sighed.
She continued, “It’s obvious. These pills won’t stop my period if that shot didn’t stop me from ovulating. So that means in a few weeks I’m at risk of you killing me because I’ll start bleeding and you’ll turn into the gray monster. Get me pregnant and that’ll erase at least one threat. Then we have nine months to figure out how to save me.”