Big Man For Christmas

Carefully, we come apart. Both of us stand and fix our clothes, coming back from the madness that took hold of us. We’re still standing on my porch and it’s still snowing.

There’s an awkward silence between us, neither of us really knowing what should happen next. But I won’t let this happen again. I won’t let her run.

So I pull her close to me and kiss her. Hard. Deep. I pour everything into this kiss and wrap her up so tightly she has no doubt that I want more. To show her that I want everything. For Carley Farrell to finally be mine.7CarleyThis kiss is like nothing I’ve ever felt in my life. It’s the kind of kiss that defines something—that makes it so that there’s a before and an after. Before I was kissed like this, and after. It’s gorgeous and terrifying because I know that when Casey pulls away that I’ll never be the same. I won’t be able to go back to the before. Before I knew that he could kiss me like this.

That he wants to kiss me like this.

Casey is holding me so tightly I ache. Like he’s afraid that I’m going to disappear back into the night. Not a fucking chance. I want more of him, but not on the porch. I want my memories with Casey to include him fucking me in a bed.

When he finally releases my lips, I’m dizzy from lack of oxygen and clinging to him. He presses his forehead against mine gently, smiling. I can feel that I’m grinning too. “Am I allowed to come inside?”

“Yes,” he says immediately. “Yes.”

He only stops to grab his guitar, never letting go of my hand as he leads me inside. But as soon as we cross the threshold, I don’t have a chance to look around.

Casey sets down the guitar and hauls me into his arms so I’m straddling his hips. I yelp in surprise. “Put me down!”

“Not a fucking chance,” he says, kicking off his shoes.

I kick mine off too. “I’m too heavy for this.”

All he does is laugh. And then he kisses me again in that deep, soul shaking way. I’m not going to be the same after tonight. Never again.

And I know the answer to my question. He does still make that sound. It’s deeper now. Richer. And it affected me exactly the same way. That growling sound reached down inside me and lit me up like a goddamn firecracker. It brought me back into pleasure, helping me dive headlong straight into a second orgasm with him. I need more.

Wiggling on his hips, I try to get him to put me down again. He doesn’t. Instead, Casey turns and presses my back against the door, so I’m trapped between it and him. And the way we’re pressed together lets me know that he’s fully hard again. I curse the layers of clothing between us.

“Carley,” he says, piercing me with his gaze, “I lift things heavier than you every goddamn day.”

“No, you don’t,” I mumble.

“Look at me.” His tone makes me raise my eyes to him. “I like this,” he says, squeezing my thighs with his fingers. “I like having you wrapped around me. I like holding you. I like carrying you. You’re not too heavy—not even close. And if you say it again, when we get upstairs, I’m going to spank you.”

Heat drops down my spine and I swear the world drops a foot underneath me. Casey’s mouth slowly turns up into a smirk. “I wondered how you would react to that.”

I swallow. “I’ve never—never done anything like that.”

My sex life has up to this point been…frankly pretty boring. The two times I’ve been with Casey are the most exciting sexual encounters that I’ve ever had, and we had most of our clothes on both times. Fuck, I can’t wait until I can see all of him.

“Depending on how long you stay,” he says, pulling me away from the wall and walking to the stairs, “maybe you will have.”

He carries me straight to the bedroom, and I’m already sweating. It’s so much warmer in here than outside, and I’m wearing layers and flannel meant to keep me warm. I get the impression that the bedroom is more modern than I remember it before I get distracted. Because Casey puts me down and starts stripping. Quickly.

I join him, peeling off my jacket and scarf and hat. But after that…suddenly my stomach fills with nerves. It’s been…a while since I was actually naked with anyone. When Tyler wanted sex, most often I’d already gone to bed. So he rolled over and fucked me in whatever I wore to bed. Nightgown or pulling down my sleep shorts. He was more interested in getting off than he was in exploring my body.

And that made sense. He had Andi. The woman is a fucking supermodel. Why would he be interested in my body? And the only times I’ve been with Casey were with clothes. I feel…shy.