“In the unlikely event that you find yourself needing more privacy than the bunks allow, feel free to use this space.”
Houston waited patiently for me to catch his drift. When I did, I nodded rather than protest, which he didn’t seem pleased about. He was harder to figure out than a quantum mechanics equation. Why even offer the possibility in the first place? No, scratch that. The better question was why it mattered to him if I slept with anyone.
And that was when I caught on to something he’d said.
“Why unlikely?”
“What?” he snapped a little too aggressively.
“You said in the unlikely event I need to fuck someone in here,” I paraphrased while returning some of his aggression. “Why is that unlikely?”
“He misspoke,” Loren dismissively answered for him. Just as I felt my shoulders began to relax, he added, “What he really meant was there isn’t a chance in hell of that happening.”
Finally, Loren had my undivided attention, which seemed to be what he wanted anyway. “Yeah?” I crossed my arms as I faced him. “Why is that?”
“Because we don’t allow groupies with dicks on board.”
“Let me guess. New rule?” Loren stubbornly chose not to answer as he stared me down. “Does this mean you won’t be bringing groupies with pussies on board?”
Chuckling, he straightened before flicking imaginary lint off his open shirt. “No can do, baby fawn. It’s tradition.”
“Ah, but a new member means new traditions, so let’s see,” I teased as I tapped my chin while pretending to think. “How about…if you’re getting laid on tour, so am I.”
I had no intention of fucking anyone but being told I couldn’t by a misogynistic prima donna meant the gloves came off.
“Sounds promising,” Loren returned with a smile I didn’t trust. He took a step forward, his salacious grin turning feral.
I had the feeling I was one wrong move from being tossed on the bed and fucked. Afraid of how much I wanted that, I started backing up. I only made it two steps before I ran into a hard chest.
Houston.
Why wasn’t he stopping Loren? He hadn’t said a word all this time. Why?
I was afraid to look over my shoulder. I knew I’d see the same hunger in Houston’s eyes that Loren was taunting me with now. What would I do then? I could ignore their desires, but I was powerless against mine.
Another step, and Loren now stood over me with Houston at my back. “You have your pick of dicks already on board, baby fawn. Enough to have a good time. Just say the word, and one of us will service you.”
“You’re disgusting.”
“Oh, I’m filthy, baby. You’re fucking right about that.”
My mouth filled with the decadent burst of juice, sweet and thick like syrup, just as the refreshing balm of a meadow and its mysterious meaning returned. By then, I was lost in Loren’s black gaze. I knew what he was waiting for. My lashes fluttered as I drifted toward him. I was done paying for past sins. I felt more alive when I was damned.
I was standing on the edge of a cliff, waiting to either fall or fly, when I felt strong hands on my hips. It took me a moment longer to realize they were keeping me at bay.
The heat left Loren’s gaze, and the rage that took its place seemed endless as he glared at Houston. “Let her go.”
Houston’s hands tightened even though I hadn’t moved an inch. “Nothing’s changed, Lo.”
“Hasn’t it?” Loren challenged. He didn’t wait for an answer before moving to grab me.
Houston was quicker since he was already touching me, and I was yanked backward before being blocked by Houston’s back. Stumbling, I slammed my hand on the wall to catch my balance. Neither of them noticed as they faced off with one another. I couldn’t see Houston’s face, so I watched Loren’s nostrils flare.
“You don’t get a say in where I stick my dick.”
“She’s one of us now,” Houston maintained. “That means she’s off-limits.”
It was a rather convenient time for him to finally admit it, but pride flared in my chest anyway. Unfortunately, it only made me feel guilty for nearly giving in to Loren. Sleeping with my bandmates wasn’t just against Houston’s rules. It was against mine.
“She’s only off-limits if she says so.”
The sound of my heart beating was louder and scarier than thunder when the room fell silent. Could they hear it? I struggled with too many emotions at once. I wanted too many things. I’d already made my decision, but my body wanted to renege.
“I say so,” I answered, thankfully without any of the reluctance I felt. “I’m not some excuse for the two of you to be at each other’s throats. My only desire is to be treated as an equal and to get through this tour in one piece.” Meeting Loren’s gaze, I let the rest of my decree rip my heart in half. “Everything else is just noise.”