I watched Braxton play that stupid slot machine for thirty minutes before running out of cash and winning only ten of it back.
Taking her hand, I led her away, and after losing all her cash, she didn’t object. Houston and Rich were busy putting money on the races, and I had the feeling the clingy fucks had backed off Braxton to make room for me to get my shit together.
After asking Braxton if she was hungry and getting her to agree to have dinner with me, I managed to get us a table in a private room without reservations. Arranging it was chaotic as fuck, but getting some time alone with Braxton was worth it. Once we were seated, closed off from prying eyes, and left alone with our drinks, I got up from my side of the tall booth to sit next to her.
Sticking to the pact I’d already broken once, I’d ordered lemonade instead of something hard like I needed, and she did the same. Right now, her eyes were glued to her drink as she tried to avoid mine.
“Look at me.” I couldn’t take it anymore.
After taking a deep breath, she did, and I finally learned the reason why she wouldn’t before. A drop of liquid slipped from her eye, and I knew she hated me even more for that tear.
It was the second time I’d made her cry.
“Don’t say you’re sorry,” she snapped when she read the words on my lips. Shaking her head, she angrily wiped the ugly truth away. “I’m sick of hearing it.”
“I don’t deserve your forgiveness, but I’m asking for it anyway.”
“Tell me why you think you need it.”
She already knew why.
She wanted to hear me admit everything I’d done out loud. She wanted my shame and regret and my anger. She wanted me to see her pain.
“I tried to push you out of my life the moment you walked into it. I let Houston belittle you because it took the heat off me. I knew Rich was using you to pull us back together again. I made a fake account just to troll you on Instagram. I told you I had feelings for you when I knew I wasn’t ready. I acted like a spoiled prick because you were smart enough not to return them. I made you feel guilty for being attracted to my friends. I was an idiot to believe that pushing us away was what you needed. I broke into your phone and found all your nudes. And then I stole your panties and jerked off in front of you. I didn’t fight for you even though I knew you were waiting.” Inhaling and exhaling, I closed my eyes and winced. “And I treated you like a groupie instead of my future wife by fucking you on the ground without asking you to dinner first.”
Braxton was staring at me when I opened my eyes while giving away nothing of what was happening inside her head.
“Aren’t you forgetting something?” she prompted when I was quiet for too long. I started sweating bullets as I ran through the list in my head. When I drew a blank and just stared at her, she pursed her lips before lifting her glass. “You left the toilet seat up this morning.” Eyeing me, she took a sip of her lemonade and then set the glass down. “I fell in.”
So that’s what her squealing was all about.
I was surprised she hadn’t ripped into me, but then again, I wasn’t. I would have seized any opening for this moment, but until now, she hadn’t been ready to listen. Another time and I would have laughed or made a joke, but at the moment, I was feeling a little dead inside.
“Tell me you forgive me.” It sounded like a demand, but we both knew it wasn’t. I was begging at this point, and I wasn’t the least bit ashamed.
Braxton was back to not looking at me again when she shrugged and offered me a nonchalant answer. “I’m working on it.”
My phone notifying me of a text kept me from begging her to work faster, damn it. Sighing, I checked my screen.
Houston: Where are you?
I texted back using one hand because the other was busy toying with the ends of Braxton’s hair.
Fuck off. I’m almost there.
My phone buzzed again since I’d put it on silent. This time it was a text from Rich since Houston had used our group chat.
Rich: Lol. I doubt it. Let us come help you.
Houston: Before you fuck it up for all of us.
Our gushing waitress returned to take our orders, and while Braxton told her what she wanted, I texted Houston and Rich the name of the restaurant. Maybe I could use some help since Braxton held onto her grudges so tightly, you’d need the jaws of life to pry them apart.