Ashley fingered her necklace.
He couldn’t stop himself. “You didn’t hurt Lizzy. That guy did. You want me to move on but you haven’t. You’re still trying to make amends. Guess what, Ashley? You can’t. You just have to live with what happened. You also can’t save everyone.”
She glared at him. “Like you do?”
That deflated him, his anger vented. “Maybe you’re right.” He hated to admit it. “Our issues are too large for us to get past.”
* * *
Ashley’s heart was splitting in two. It was excruciatingly painful. She didn’t want to lose Kiefer but she didn’t know what to do to hold on to him either. Giving up the freedom she’d fought so hard for wasn’t easy.
Somehow she managed to say in a calm voice, “It’s been a good ride while it lasted, Kiefer. I’m not going to change. You can’t either. I wish you the best.”
He stepped back, his shoulders slumped. “Then I should resign from the clinic.”
Panic filled her. “Are you trying to blackmail me?” She needed him to work at the clinic. Only with a doctor would the clinic be successful. The council would want to know why if he did leave.
“No. I just don’t think we can maintain a daily professional relationship after this. You’re more to me than an associate and I’ll never get past that. We obviously disagree fundamentally. It would be harmful for the clinic and what you’re trying to do here.”
“You talk about trust,” she spit. “I trusted you to see the bigger picture. The one beyond us. You’re no different than all the other people who come here for a few days then leave feeling good about themselves without truly investing in the neighborhood. Southriver is just something to look good on your résumé. I thought you were starting to devote your heart and life to this place. I believed, of all people, you understood loyalty. You were getting to know the people. Becoming part of us. Now here at the first bump you’re trying to figure out how to get out.”
“What’re you talking about? You are more than a bump to me. I came here and worked my butt off, giving my all to the job. Not everyone wants or needs to spend every waking hour trying to save Southriver. You know what I think? I think you need to have a crusade. Something that will fill the void where you should have a personal life. You’re afraid to care about anyone because you might lose them.”
His accusation froze her for a moment. Was she really doing that? Was she covering up being scared? Pushing him away? But what was he offering her? The same thing they had been doing? There was no real commitment there.
She started picking the stuff up off the floor. “I just want people to have a happy life.”
“It’s not your job to provide that for them. Yours is to represent them. You’re thinking only of Southriver and leaving no room for yourself. Me.”
Had she really become consumed by her ideals? “I know it isn’t working between us but I still need you to stay at the clinic. I was given six months to prove this clinic should be funded. If you leave now they’ll pull my funding. Close the clinic. It’ll affect my reelection as well.”
That stuck like a knife in Kiefer’s gut. Just as he’d suspected. It was about political gain. Once again he’d been fooled on more than one front. “That’s all you care about. Your clinic. I thought we had something real and all you can say when I tell you I’ll be leaving is what’s going to happen to your precious clinic. Tell me how you’re so different from my ex-wife. All that talk of her being selfish. Even if the cause is a good one, it’s still more important to you than us. I’ve played second seat for the last time to the last person I’m going to. I knew better than to get involved. But I let myself do it anyway. No more. Not again.”
“I’m sorry you feel that way.” Ashley put the papers and purse on the kitchen table. She sounded casual but all she wanted to do was drop to her knees and sob.
Kiefer walked toward her bedroom and returned with his shoes on and a bag in his hands. “I’ll stay at the clinic until a replacement can be found.”
“Thank you for that.”
“Good-bye, Ashley.”
“Bye.” The word was weak and sad, just like how she felt.
* * *
The next few weeks were beyond painful for Ashley. Just knowing that Kiefer was only steps away made life almost unbearable. Still, she couldn’t come up with a way to make the situation better. Surely a new doctor, an old and stodgy one, would replace Kiefer soon. She desperately wanted the clinic to succeed, but how she was going to survive when he was gone forever she had no idea.
She tried to force herself not to look out the window when it was time for Kiefer to leave for the day, but most of the time she couldn’t resist just watching his back as he walked to his truck. The trick was to make sure she moved away from the window so he wouldn’t see how pathetic she was if he happened to look up toward her apartment. The first week after their split she’d made a point of not returning home before she thought he would be done for the day. For the most part it had worked, but then she was driven to have just a glimpse of him whenever she could.
Did he ever do that? From what she could tell, he was honoring her request to avoid any contact outside of what was necessary for the clinic. Which had been little. He was an excellent administrator and the clinic was running smoothly. Ashley just hoped it wouldn’t be damaged by Kiefer leaving. The community had started accepting him. It was ironic that her personal issue with Kiefer might ultimately damage what she had worked for years to accomplish in Southriver.
The time came when she had no choice but to go to the clinic. It had been open for weeks now and she needed to submit an updated report to the council about how it was doing. She hoped she could see Maria to get some statistics and be gone before she had to face Kiefer. Going in the front door instead of down her stairs seemed like the best way to accomplish that.
With purse in hand, she entered. The waiting room was full. She hated it that so many people felt ill, but it also demonstrated the need for the clinic. Kiefer was nowhere in sight as she approached the desk.
“Hey, Maria. I need to get an idea of how many patients have been seen since the clinic opened. How many were serious enough to send to the hospital and what the needs are.”
“Wouldn’t you rather talk to Dr. Bradford about that?”
Ashley glanced down the hall. Could she be a bigger coward? “No, I don’t want to bother him. You should have all the information I need in your computer files.”
“Sure, I’ll pull it up if all you want is numbers. Problems and needs you’ll have to talk to him about.”
Ashley waited impatiently, all too aware that Kiefer could walk in at any moment. She believed in facing life head-on, yet she was hiding from the very person she cared the most about. A fact that had become agonizingly obvious to her over the last few days. What to do about it she didn’t have an answer to.
The clinic door opened behind her.
“Oh, no,” Maria whispered.
Ashley turned. Marko stood there with a wild look in his eyes and a gun in his hand. He slammed the door and locked it behind him.
Ashley’s heart beat faster and fear lodged in her throat.
“No one move. Keep your hands where I can see them,” Marko snarled. “Everyone that has a cell phone, take them out and put them on the floor. You two get over here.” He pointed to her and Maria, gesturing that they join the others in the waiting area. “Cell phones on the floor.”
They did as they were told. It sounded and looked like a bad movie drama. But this was sickeningly real.
Marko pointed the gun at Ashley and commanded Maria, “Get the doctor.”
“Marko, I’m sure Dr. Bradford will be glad to see you.” Ashley worked to keep her voice level. “Put the gun down and I’ll get him for you.”
An older man sitting in the
waiting room stood. Marko rounded on him.
“Sit down. Now.” The man hesitated a second. Marko raised the gun. “Sit down now.” He turned back to Ashley. “Call the doctor.” The last word was a shout.
Before Ashley had a chance to move, Kiefer came hurrying up the hall. “What’s going on here?”
He stopped short when he saw Marko.
“You’re coming with me,” Marko stated. He pointed the gun toward Kiefer’s chest. “Let’s go.”
Ashley’s heart missed a beat and she held her breath. What if Marko shot Kiefer? It was her fault Kiefer was in danger. She should have told the police weeks ago about Marko’s threats.
“Where?” Kiefer asked. There was a note of defiance in his voice.
“You don’t need to know.” Marko waved the gun toward the door.
“I’m not going anywhere until I know what this is about.” Kiefer’s voice was firm.
Marko pointed the gun at Ashley. “Let’s go or I’ll shoot her.”
Kiefer’s jaw tightened, his lips thinned. Pain filled his eyes. “I need to get my bag. If you’ll tell me what this is about, I can get the correct supplies.”
Marko took a second before he answered. “Knife wound. You stay here. She can get the supplies.” He pointed the gun at Maria.
She was in tears. Quaking, she looked as if she might become hysterical at any moment. Her voice wobbled when she said, “I can’t. I don’t know what to get.”
Marko looked at her for a moment then turned to Ashley. “You do it. Don’t try anything. All of you, let’s go.” He directed the gun toward the waiting room.
The group stood and headed down the hall. Ashley followed with Kiefer close behind.
“Get in that room. All of you.”
As Ashley started to crowd into the full exam room with everyone else, Marko said, “Not you. You’re going with us.”
“She doesn’t need to go. You have me,” Kiefer said.
“Shut up. She’ll be my insurance. You do what you’re told and don’t try anything.”