Kissmas Wishes (Love In All Seasons 3)

I began to move inside of her, thrusting my thickness into her sweet channel and she loves the way it feels. I know because the smile on her face grows wider. Her eyes shimmer with delight, her breathing is shallow matching mine.

“God, you feel so good,” I tell her, the words honest and clear. She nods, wanting more and I roll her over, squeezing her ass as she sits down on me.

“Oh, my God,” she moans. “That's so much more.”

I may be a virgin, but I've imagined this moment for all my life, since my very first wet dream. I've been picturing this right here, right now, having Maple St. Claire ride me like a goddamn cowgirl. Her tits bounce and whatever pain she felt fades as her come drips from her cunt over my cock.

“I’m coming,” she tells me. “I’m coming so hard.” She presses her hands to my chest, and I pull her close, my hand on the base of her neck and I kiss her. I breathe through her orgasm, taking it as my own. My cock fills her up and I thrust deeper and deeper, wanting to come together.

We do.

It doesn't take long; both of us so damn horny and so damn ready for this. All of it. She rolls off of me to the side, her fingers reaching for my tight balls, the come on the tip of my cock. Come dripping from her cunt.

“You're so goddamn gorgeous,” I tell her, brushing strands of hair from her face. “Thank you,” I tell her. “You have no idea what that means to me.”

She smiles, shaking her head. “Filson, you are seriously so slow sometimes.”

“How so?” I ask with a laugh.

“I’m the one who should be thanking you. I've wanted you longer than you've wanted me.”

I laugh, running my hand over her body, teasing her nipples with my fingers. “That's not true. I've been in love with you since I was six years old.”

The moment I say it, I realize maybe I've spoken too soon. Said way too much for the first fuck.

Her eyes widen. “Love?” she asks.

I pull back, realizing my mistake. You don't tell a woman you love her the first time you end up in her bed. It's all too much. Too sudden, too soon.

I'm scared to be rejected, so I pull away before she can push.

“Ahh, never mind,” I retract. “I didn't mean that. I meant I've always had a thing for you, Maple.”

She nods slowly. “A thing for me?”

“Yeah,” I say, wondering when the tension is going to fade, but she rises from the bed before I can say any more and reaches for her clothes.

“I’m going to take a shower. I don't know if maybe you wanted to start on the lights or not. No worries if not,” she says briskly. “You can do that another time or not at all. Honestly, I'm sorry. I just…” And before she even finishes her sentence, she rushes to the bathroom, closing the door down the hall.

I get up feeling like a goddamn fool. Looks like I fucked it all up just when I got the girl.MapleRushing out of my bedroom and leaving Filson there alone was perhaps a bit dramatic, but this entire day has been dramatic.

I turn on the shower and step into the hot water, letting it wash over me. When he said love, my heart lurched. Leaped. It's the one word I've always wanted to hear from him specifically, but then he retracted it immediately and acted like he didn't mean it at all. At that instant, my heart wrapped around itself. Tightly. He changed his words so fast because he apparently didn’t mean them.

I run a bar of soap over my body, hating the way I feel right now. So utterly alone. It brings me back to all those years ago when I was just a little girl, an orphan, left alone in the world. After my parents died in a car crash, I was sent to Granny's house here on Jingle Bell Lane. It’s a place I had never imagined living in but have always loved. Still, I loved it because I came here with Mom and Dad, not because I came here alone.

My parents loved me fiercely, but then they were gone in the blink of an eye and now Granny's gone too, and I'm feeling more like an orphan than I ever have before. I'm a grown woman and I shouldn't feel like this, but I do. So, when Filson looked at me today and made me feel wanted and seen, I dove right in.

I can't believe his feelings for me aren’t the same as the feelings I have for him. Is it always going to be like this? Me loving blindly, waiting for someone to return the feelings… waiting for him to return the feelings? I've waited long enough.