Placing them beside her, he took a seat on the other side, getting close to her.
“Did you sleep well last night?” he asked.
“Yes, did you?”
She was always so polite.
“Yes.” After he’d brought himself to orgasm, cleaned away the mess he slept like a baby with no dreams at all.
They sat together staring out across the pond. Several small children were throwing bread to the ducks. Every time he came to this spot he always felt at peace.
“This is a lovely place,” she said, resting her head on his shoulder.
“Good. I think it’s a great place to wind down from work, especially dealing with clients I imagine you get all the time.” He rested back on his hands, liking the way she rested against him.
“Yeah, we get all kinds of cases. Divorce, murder, family, and a few others that have gone out of my head.” She rested a palm against her forehead. “It’s hard at times watching them all come through knowing some of them are suffering.”
He listened to her talk. Ryan believed part of her problem was she rarely got the chance to really talk without someone dissecting everything she said.
“I see some women who come in and are happy to be getting a divorce. They’re happy to get severance pay or something for time taken. I don’t like them so much, especially if kids are involved. I’ve seen gold-diggers at first hand. It’s surprising how upset some of the men get when they realize they’ve been used.”
“It’s a hard business, honey.”
“Yeah, then there are the women who love their man and they’ve been replaced by a younger model.” She sighed. “I think I need to look for another job. I’m starting to sound depressing.”
“No, it’s good to talk.”
After several minutes of silence he reached out toward the basket. “Are you ready for some good food?” he asked.
“Yes, I really am.” Her beautiful smile stopped him for a moment. Something different was happening to him. The woman before him wasn’t just a challenge to him, she meant so much more.
They barely knew each other and he forced that knowledge to the back of his mind. There was no need for him to get all serious. He’d take each day as it came before heading into any kind of relationship.
* * * *
How did he do it?
Jesse watched him unload the picnic basket he brought, wondering what it was about him that made her feel so comfortable. Not one member of her family asked about her job, not one. They never allowed her to talk about her life. Thinking about her time with her family, most of her time was spent listening to them talk about their achievements.
Everyone disappeared when she tried to talk. All of them thought she still suffered and preferred not to listen.
Jake only listened to part of her life. He still saw her as damaged. How could she move on when no one would let her?
“Thank you,” she said.
“What?” he asked, dishing out little portions of everything onto a plate.
“For letting me talk. It has been so long since I’ve talked about work or anything.” She frowned, looking up at him. “It’s insane.”
“No, it’s not insane." He offered her a spoonful of something. "Open.”
Opening her lips, the flavor of a pepper pasta salad exploded on her tongue.
“Good?”
“Very good. I like everything with spice in.”
“Do you cook?” he asked, offering her something else.
“Yes, I love cooking. I live in a small one bedroom house on the outskirts of the city. I’ve got a proper range cooker but I don’t always get a chance to use it.” Her family rarely asked her to bring anything to dinner.
They’ve been there for you.
“What are you thinking?” he asked.
“What?”
“You were thinking something you didn’t like, what was it?”
“Erm, I was thinking about my family and how they’ve been with me over the years. I don’t know.” Tucking some loose strands of hair behind her ear, she stared out over the lake.
“They’ve been there for you yet you feel they’re keeping you trapped in a little box labelled fragile?”
She gasped, turning back to look at him. “How do you know?”
“I know you. You’re a lot easier to read than you realize.” He shrugged. “You’re not a hard person to understand.” Another forkful of food was pressed into her mouth.
“They rarely let me talk about my life after what happened.” She ate some more food, watching him as he took some for his own.
“You talked to someone about what happened?”
“Yes. I’ve been talking to the same woman for the past ten years.”
“Tell me how you feel. Don’t hold anything back.”
“You’re a stranger. I can’t talk to a stranger about this.” She sat up, crossing her legs in front of her.
Ryan placed his jacket over her legs. “I’m not having any other man looking at your pussy. You were showing everything that’s mine.”
Heat filled her cheeks at the intensity of his stare.
“Thank you.”
“The psychiatrist you spoke to started out life as a stranger. Why not talk to me? I’m not going to hurt you or make you tell me something you don’t know.” He passed her a made up plate, which she took from him.
Watching him eat she found herself relaxing in his company. “Once I start talking about what happened people have a tendency to disappear.”
“I’m not walking away, and I’m not asking you to relive what happened. Just talk about your own feelings about what you want.” He ate in between talking.
Silence fell as she stared across the pond. Unlike her family, Ryan wasn’t pressuring her or de
manding that she seek help. He wasn’t even trying to make her see someone to help her deal.
Licking her dry lips, she thought back to that time.
“I was taken for two days,” she said. “He tied me to a chair to start off with.” They sat in the open air with people walking around them but not too close they could hear her speaking. “He talked constantly about the future. At first I was terrified, actually I was scared throughout it all. I didn’t know who he was, and I wanted to go home. He fed me and at night he, erm, he forced himself on me but it wasn’t painful beside the loss of my virginity.”
Ryan touched her hand, offering her strength.
“Anyway, afterward I found out he’d done it to other girls in three different states. They finally found him and it ended in a shootout where he died.” Eating some of her food, Jesse talked about what happened without feeling sick or hurting. She only wanted to get passed everything and to move onto something more.
No man ever stuck around after she told them the truth. Jesse told Ryan everything, how the man had made love to her rather than physically hurt her.
“I had nightmares a couple of weeks after but once I talked with my psychiatrist I stopped. I’ve always been able to deal with everything that’s happened to me logically. It hurt and I hate the fact I suffered it but I don’t want my whole life to be about what happened over ten years ago. I’m stronger than that.” She pressed a hand to her heart really feeling the words she spoke down to her soul.
“What does your family think?”
“They think I’m fragile and I’ll break at the first hurdle. I’m not damaged or broken. You know, today was the first time I talked about my job.” She laughed, the noise sounded forced even to her. “What’s worse is I know my family love me and they wouldn’t dream of letting me think like that.”
“You’re family love you, Jesse. I’ve got no doubt of that even Jake loves you like a friend but they’re afraid. They don’t know how to move on.” He released her hand to finish eating.
“What do you suggest I do?” she asked.