“So, what do you think? You’ve been awful quiet.” Axel’s voice pulled me out of my thoughts.
“There are no words. You have all these hidden jewels in your back pocket. How did you find this place?”
He smiled that sexy smile I loved so much as he reached across the table and gently stroked the back of my hand with his thumb. “Let’s go take a walk out on the balcony. The weather’s perfect. It’s not raining for a change.”
“I’d love to.”
Axel waved for the waiter. He ordered two glasses of red wine, paid the bill, then gently assisted me out of my seat before handing me my glass. Amazed at how perfect everything felt with him, I placed my hand in his while we walked out to the deck. I inhaled the scent of the ocean as the heels of my shoes clapped against the aged wood. I absolutely loved the smell of salt water in the air. Facing out toward the water, I lifted my face to feel the gentle wind blow against my skin. Axel brushed up behind me, slipping an arm around my waist.
“I told you it was beautiful up here,” he whispered as he nibbled where my ear met my neck.
“It really is. I can’t even express how incredible this is.”
“I’m glad you like it. I’ve never brought anyone else up here before, but I wanted you to share this place with me.”
I turned in his arms, taking a sip of my wine. I tilted my head to look into his eyes. “Not anyone? I find that hard to believe with all the women you’ve been with. Surely at least one lucky woman got to be blessed with this special place.”
“Just one,” he whispered. “And she’s wrapped tightly in my arms.” He pulled back, taking my chin between his thumb and finger. “And, just for the record, I haven’t been with as many women as you think.”
I tried not to roll my eyes or laugh. I gently punched him in the chest. “I know who you are, Axel Rye. You don’t need to lie to try to seduce me.”
“What are you trying to say? Do I have a bad reputation?” he asked with a wicked gleam in his eye.
“The Great Axel Rye. Need I say more?”
“You know, those words could get you into some serious trouble if you aren’t careful. You know what else The Great Axel Rye is known for?”
“Are you threatening me, you bad boy?” I giggled.
“I never threaten. I follow through on everything I say.” He leaned down and gently placed a kiss on my lips.
“Can I ask you a question?”
Axel nodded. “Anything.”
I was dying to know the answer. “If you grew up in such a bad home life, and your parents weren’t your examples, and you never have had any other serious relationships, then how did you become so good at it? How did you learn to love? To show love in the way that you do?”
He paused for moment as if he were trying to remember. “When I was about fifteen years old, I lived next door to this surfer and his wife. This man was so cool in my eyes. He worked some sort of construction by day, but whenever he got the chance, he surfed. His wife was gorgeous, and probably my first real crush.” Axel stopped and smiled. “I would look out my window at night and just watch them sit outside and talk. They always had a glass of wine or beer, and would sit under the stars and just laugh. They kissed, they cuddled, and they always appeared so happy. Their relationship seemed so perfect.” Axel’s smile melted away. “This was a huge contrast to my parents, who fought all the time if they were even together.” Axel paused and kissed the top of my head. “Am I boring you?”
I shook my head eagerly. “No, not at all. I love hearing about your past.”
Axel took a deep breath before continuing on. “Anyway, this couple next door was everything my parents weren’t. It was nice to see… love. Well, one night I could see the neighbors in the kitchen fighting. I mean really fighting. My heart sank, because this perfect couple I loved spying on was just like everyone else. Just like my screwed up parents. And just as I was panicking that this perfect little world I spied on was about to crumble, I watched him reach out to her, kiss her on the forehead and whisper in her ear. He held her, and she held him back. He caressed her back as she clung to him, desperate for his love. No matter what, they had that. Love. I knew that I would someday have that. I wouldn’t settle for half ass. I wouldn’t settle until I was with someone I couldn’t keep my hands off, and she couldn’t keep hers off me. I wanted love that would be forever displayed. I guess I owe my old neighbors for all my mushiness.”
“So you were a Peeping Tom growing up,” I teased.
Axel started to laugh. “I guess you could say that.”
We both laughed, enjoying this evening that belonged only to us. Nothing else seemed to matter at that point, and we were oblivious to all that surrounded us. Kissing, loving, growing together as a couple. This date captured my heart.
“Do you want to know how many women I’ve woken up to the next morning, Quinn? How many women I’ve taken to my own special places? How many women I have obsessed about, how many I find myself thinking of nothing else but them? How many women I’ve trusted my heart with without planning to? One. The answer is only one.”
“Sometimes I feel like I need to wake from this amazing dream that I’m having. You’re everything I ever wanted in a man, and why you’ve chosen me is confusing.” I paused, searching for the right words. “You could have any woman you want. Someone who truly understands you and your life.”
“You are the woman I want.”
“Why?” I asked quickly.
“Why, what?”
“Why me? Of all the women you could have, out of all the women who want you, why me?” Taking a deep breath, he pulled me deeper into his arms. “Because you’re the only woman who genuinely is interested in me. You seem to care about the man inside, and not just the exterior. I know it sounds ridiculous when I tell you how alone I’ve been, since I’m never physically alone, but lately I’ve been in a dark place. I have this vision of a traditional love. I want a connection and a bond with someone that can never be broken. I want to be able to look into my lover’s eyes and no longer feel the shadows seeping in.” Axel turned me so he stared directly into my eyes. “For the first time in my life, I feel normal. I feel a new reason to get up in the morning. It is you. You.”
QUI
NN
I SUPPORTED the phone between my shoulder and ear as I made some breakfast. I couldn’t help but wake Harrison up early to tell him all that had happened. After coming home last night, I’d hardly slept. So many things overran my mind, leaving me lost in a fog. I had to talk to someone about it.
Axel had wanted me to stay the night, but I decided it was best to come home and wrap my head around everything that happened. We had not only had sex, but we both had admitted to falling in love. Axel still wanted to see me today, so he was picking me up in an hour. Being apart for long seemed almost impossible for us both.
I’d been on the phone with Harrison for a while now. He seemed to think my growing relationship with Axel was meant to be. Harrison was happy for me and happy that Axel had me in such high spirits. From everything I’d told Harrison so far about Axel, Harrison knew we were in love. Harrison even jokingly started referring to Axel as hubby. Then, unexpectedly, Harrison asked, “What does Axel think about the book you’re working on? Did he give you a list of rules you can or cannot write about?”
I stopped and closed my eyes. I didn’t want to lie, but I didn’t want to confess my failure to reveal that secret.
“Well…” I paused to figure out how to make it less of a lie. “Axel and I haven’t really talked about it too much.” That much was true.
“Hmm,” Harrison said. “Maybe it’s better that way. He might be hesitant to fully open up to you. He may feel you are just using him.”
I sighed with relief. As usual, Harrison and I saw things the same way. My reasoning on not clarifying things about my true profession to Axel held a little more rationale now. Although the feeling didn’t last long as Harrison continued on.
“But maybe you do want to be honest. You don’t want to start things off by keeping things from him. But you don’t need to talk about it all the time. Last thing you want is for him to think you’re pumping him for information every time you two talk.”