Tiny pulled out a chair at the table. She filled up three glasses, handing one to her father before taking the other out to the small table for Nathan, who drank it in a few gulps and disappeared again back into one of the flower beds.
From the kitchen, she could keep an eye on him.
She’d drained the potatoes for the salad and had allowed them to cool down while she’d been out in the garden. Taking out some celery, herbs, and dressing ingredients, she got to chopping them up as Tiny sat at the chair.
“Dad, you may as well come out with it, whatever it is.”
“Simon.”
She paused in her cutting. “What about him?”
“He’s been seen.”
“Of course he has.” In the past five years, there had been a few rare sightings of the man who’d crushed her heart. She tried not to think of just how painful that moment had been when he’d walked away from her. She didn’t want to think about it or remember it. That night would forever be one of the worst of her existence.
She finished chopping, putting her ingredients into a bowl. Angel was all about the measuring, whereas she liked to just go with the flow. No measuring. Going by eye and taste. She added the mayonnaise, a few dashes of vinegar, and her personal favorite, some pickles, which she’d diced up.
She poured all the potatoes into a bowl and gave it a nice big stir, making sure everything was evenly covered.
It looked lovely and she took a bite. Closing her eyes, she was happy.
Next, the macaroni salad.
“Honey, are you even going to listen to me?”
She went to the fridge, finding the rest of the ingredients for the next salad, and paused to look at him. “Why do I need to listen to you? So he’s been seen again. There’s nothing you guys are going to do about it. The first year he was gone, I begged you to go and find him, and you refused.”
“It wasn’t like that. We were still dealing with the fallout of him killing—”
“Don’t say his name.” She held up her hand for him to stop.
“Honey, have you ever considered going to therapy?”
She burst out laughing. “When I go and talk to a bunch of people I don’t know to tell them about my pain? No, thank you.”
“You’ve never spoken to anyone about what happened.”
“Because I don’t need to. I don’t need to do any of this.” She put the tomatoes and cucumbers on the counter.
After pulling out a fresh bowl, along with the jar of olives, she got to work chopping, trying to ignore the pain in her body.
Simon was once again seen.
She’d spent way too much time hoping it meant he was coming back to her. There had been so many nights she’d lain awake hoping and wishing. A few sounds of a bike’s engine had filled her with excitement but nothing had come. She’d stopped expecting a long time ago.
“You went through a lot.”
“I know. I went through a lot. I dealt with it. No one needs to talk their feelings to death, Dad. I’ve got a handle on all of this.”
She dropped the diced tomatoes and cucumbers into a bowl, more herbs and mayo. She couldn’t think of what else to put in it, and so she added the pasta, stirred, tasted, and then remembered some cheese.
Grabbing a pack of pre-grated, she tipped the contents into the bowl, gave another stir, and then she was done.
“Don’t walk away from me,” Tiny said.
“Dad, I’m not walking away. I’ve got a son to take care of. I don’t need to go thinking about stories of my husband. Believe me, it’s … I just need to focus on Nathan. That’s all I need right now and you and Mom should be happy about that. Why aren’t you?”
“We know you’re hurting.”
She licked her lips. “Look, I spent way too much time hoping for him to come back. Simon’s got his own life now and so have I. I’ve got a son I love more than anything. My life isn’t so complicated. I work. I take care of him. I’m fine.”
“You’re not living at all. All you’re doing is getting from one day to the next.”
“And it’s working. I don’t need anything else. Not right now. Please, don’t make me think about more of this.”
“We could reach out.”
She shook her head. “No. If you were going to reach out, you’d have done it years ago. Now it’s just, it’s sad. That’s what it is. I don’t need Simon. I never did. I’m not waiting around for him anymore.”
“So does that mean you’re dating someone?”
“Is that what all of this is about?” she asked. “Me dating?”
“What if your mom and I set you up with someone?” Tiny asked.
“No.”
“Come on. It will then give us peace of mind that you are fine here.”