... and Forever (Next Generation: Chaos Bleeds 1)
Page 52
“So what you’re saying is this is an ultimatum.”
“No, Tabby. This is me trying to do the right thing and also keep you. I’m selfish like that. You should have realized it long ago.” He smiled.
He looked so sad. They’d had a good couple of days. She got to meet his friends and see a part of him she hadn’t known in a long time. Simon was amazing. There was no doubt about it. He’d just proven to be a lousy husband.
“Can I just go and see my son? Talk to someone?” She glanced down at her body. “Maybe wear my own clothes?”
“You don’t like my stuff?”
“I do, but it’s not me.” She liked having Simon’s scent wrapped around her. Little by little, she found herself no longer angry at him. Again, she didn’t know if that was a good thing or not.
The pain had lessened a little bit, which she was thankful for, but there was still so much damage between them. She honestly didn’t know if they were ever going to repair it.
Tucking her hair behind her ear, she smiled at him.
Closing the distance, she cupped his face and went on her toes, kissing him. “Thank you.”
“Don’t thank me yet. I want to steal you away forever.”
A part of her wanted that. The part of her that wished they could be locked away forever, close off the world, and throw away the key. It wasn’t going to happen. They weren’t designed like that.
“Take me back to him, please.”
She missed Nathan so much. Just the other night, she’d been sitting there, and all she wanted to do was read him a book. To be near him. He was her son, and she loved him more than anything in the world.
Passing Simon, she moved toward the truck and climbed into the passenger seat. There was no sign of his friends or Dean.
Dean liked to stop by.
She ran her hands over the sweatpants. The shirt she wore was creased. Simon didn’t own an iron and so she didn’t have any way of making his clothes look neat. Even though large shirts and sweats didn’t exactly require an iron.
“Don’t worry about how you look. He won’t care.”
“How do you know?” she asked.
“I had a mom, remember? I know how this goes.”
She chuckled. “Lexie wears creased sweatpants and a shirt?”
“Yep, and she also had the vomit stains as well from the milk. I’m used to it and if Nathan loves you, he won’t care.”
“What a way to strain a relationship. What if he doesn’t love me?” she asked, glancing toward him.
“It’s not possible. He will love you.”
“But what if he doesn’t?” She ran fingers through her hair. “I never thought about that. I mean, do kids always love their parents?”
“Yes, they do,” he said, laughing. “You loved Eva and Tiny, didn’t you?”
“Well, yeah, but I hated them as well.”
“And one day, Nathan is going to hate you. I wonder if you’ll be the mom that stops him from going on dates.” Simon chuckled.
“Did Lexie hate you going on dates?” Tabitha asked.
“No. I didn’t go on any dates. My heart was owned by you. That never changed.” He smiled. “I rarely brought a girl home and when I did, most of the time she arrived with a whole MC. It was a family thing.”
“This girl of yours sounds awesome.”
“She totally was. You should meet her. She was fearless.”
Tabitha sighed. “We were different back then. Kids. We didn’t know how the world worked.”
“We did, Tabby. We knew what we were getting into. Our parents always thought we were kids, but that is so not true. We were more than that. We were fearless.” Simon took hold of her hand, and she let him, not wanting to fight. “It’s the way we will always be. We’re the ones in control. No one else.” He brought her hand to his lips, kissing her knuckles. She remembered what happened the last time he kissed her like this. How sweet, and then of course the sex.
The sex was better than any other time.
Pulling her hand away, she clasped it with her other, trying to keep herself in check. It wasn’t good for her to allow her mind to wander. She needed to be in control.
“It’s going to be okay, you know? Nathan loves you and he’s going to adore me. I swear it.”
She nodded but didn’t say a word.
This was the longest she’d been away from her son, ever.
Simon turned on the radio to some tune she didn’t know. The music filled the silence, and she was able to not worry. Listening to the words, she tried not to think about her son, about Simon. What if Nathan adored Simon but in time, he couldn’t stand to look at him?
So many problems she didn’t want to face.
The time for her to decide if she’d allow Simon to see him faded as they pulled up at Lexie and Devil’s house. The front door opened and there stood Devil.