“Don’t what?”
“Hate each other.”
“Tabby, babe, I don’t hate you.”
“I don’t hate you either.” She sat up. “What if we put the past to bed? We really do just start over.”
“Getting to know each other?”
“No. I don’t mean that.” She ran fingers through her hair. “I mean, I stop holding it against you about what you did, and you stop feeling guilty for not being there. We wipe that out of our history. It happened, but it’s not the only thing that happened between us. We’ve got so much more, don’t you think?”
He sat back, looking at her. Reaching out, he stroked a stray curl. “Do you think you can do that?”
“Simon, I’ve never stopped loving you. In case you didn’t get the memo, I just picked you and Chaos Bleeds over everything else. I love you. I want to be with you. What I don’t want is to keep on fighting over something we can’t change. It happened. Can’t we at least, you know, get over it? You think we can do that?”
“So.” He sat up in bed, moving a little closer to her. He cupped her cheek. “Does this mean I get to sleep in your bed?”
“Our bed. Yes. Unless you stink or are completely drunk and disgusting.”
“I won’t drink. What else do I get to do?”
“Simon, you’re my husband. I think it’s time you started to act like it.”
He fingered the band on the necklace around her neck. “I’d gladly do it, but you’ve also got to give me a little something. You need to wear this.”
She reached behind her neck, unclasping the necklace. She slid the ring off and he watched as she put it right where it was supposed to be.
“See, I can do it as well.” She leaned forward and kissed his lips. “This is our forever part. I want it. I don’t want to keep on fighting. So it means being with each other through thick and thin. You know, the whole sickness gig.”
“I’m there. I’m right there with you. There is one snag.”
“What?”
“I’m still a prospect. You know what it means?”
“Long hours. You’re going to come home stinking. You’ve got the whole loyalty thing to prove.”
“You got it. It’s going to be a bumpy road.” He pulled her close.
“But we can do this together. You can also … get to know Nathan.”
“Don’t do that,” he said.
“What am I doing?”
“He’s mine. I don’t care about the rest of it, Tabby. I’ll love him. I do love him. I want to take care of him, and I will.” He kissed the top of her head, loving her.Chapter SeventeenOne month.
Two months.
Three months.
Tabitha held her hair back as she threw up in the bowl. This was becoming a regular habit. So far, she’d been able to contain it until Simon left the house. He kept such odd hours. The guys at the club had him doing a great deal of shitty work. Chaos Bleeds, since their turn to the legal side of things, had started up an array of businesses. Their most successful was indeed their clothing shop. Lexie kept asking her to come and work there, but she still kept her job at the coffee shop.
Of course, working at a coffee shop with all those smells was becoming a bit of a hazard. There was no reason for her to get a damn test, but she knew it was going to have to happen. This was no stomach bug or flu.
Nope.
This was plain old stupidity.
She and Simon.
Sex.
Fucking.
No protection.
Once again, consequences.
“Are you okay, Mommy?”
She looked toward her son with a smile. “Yes, I’m okay. I’m more than okay.” She flushed the toilet. Her stomach was still doing somersaults but she was capable of moving now.
She grabbed her toothbrush and got to work on her teeth. “I’ll be done soon and I’ll take you to school.”
“Okay.”
He sounded so sad, and she hated it when he was sad. “What’s the matter?” she asked. She spat out her toothpaste and crouched down to see into his eyes.
“It’s nothing.”
“Now, come on, you can’t do that to me. We’re best friends, right? What do best friends do?”
“We tell each other everything?”
“Right. I can’t help you if you don’t help me.”
Tears shone in his eyes and it broke her heart. “What is it, baby?” she asked.
“I … you’re going to think I’m a loser.”
“Hey, do not ever say that. I don’t think you’re a loser. You’re one of the nicest people I know, and I know a lot.”
He’d bowed his head. She put a finger beneath his chin and lifted his face so she could look at him. “I love you. You’re my brave boy. Come on, tell me.”
His chin wobbled.
All she wanted to do was protect him. To not let the world get to him, or infect him with their nastiness.
“No one…” He stopped to sniffle. “No one likes me, Mommy. I have no friends. I hear them. They call me scum.” He covered his face with his hands. “They say I don’t have a daddy and you don’t know who he is.”