Cowboy Take Me Away (Rough Riders 16)

“If it wasn’t for Harland, Darren, Marshall and Stuart’s wives agreeing with us the feud was stupid, I doubt our kids would know theirs at all,” Kimi said.

Carolyn smiled. “That’s because men act like the c**k of the walk but women rule the roost.” Her smile dried and sorrow washed over her. “Harland…was such a hard man. I hated that Dag couldn’t be himself for fear of his father’s reaction. Especially when Thomas and Susan were so accepting when Sebastian told them he was g*y. Dag’s was such a senseless death.” She closed her eyes. God had been looking out for Colton. She said a prayer of thanks every day in the last year that her son had gotten the help he’d needed and he hadn’t ended up like Dag. If not for Kade…

Kimi squeezed her hand. “I know. I’m thankful too. Colt will be all right. They say the first year is the hardest.”

“I get that. It’s hard that he’s had to isolate himself from his family to keep the sobriety. But whatever works for him, right?”

“Right.” Kimi sighed. “So damn many secrets in this family.”

Carolyn shook her finger at her sister. “And quite a few that I wish you wouldn’t have told me.”

“So you’ve said. That’s because I trust you and I kept them both for a long time. Think of my burden.”

“I get that Jed loved you because you reminded him so much of Mom. But do you think he told you the truth about what happened to Jonas and Silas McKay because of our West lineage?”

Kimi jammed a hand through her hair. “Yes. I just wish I hadn’t promised Jed not to tell McKay descendants the truth.”

“I hated all the questions Keely asked when she did that genealogy paper and I had to lie to her and hide all Dinah McKay’s journals up in the attic. Carson knew something was up.”

“Well, our grandfather Zachariah West had a valid reason for his hatred toward the McKays: Silas McKay killed his brother Ezekiel and basically got away with it. Maybe it was self defense, but when Silas fled instead of letting a judge decide his fate…it sure made him look guilty,” Kimi said.

“It didn’t help that Jonas McKay paid Zachariah for the land he’d ‘won’ in the poker match—a few months after his twin escaped from jail. It did look like blood money.”

“My opinion is Zachariah shouldn’t have accepted the money. But he did and he agreed to keep his mouth shut about it. So like I said, his hatred of Jonas McKay was understandable, but Zachariah wasn’t innocent either. In fact, he helped perpetrate the continuing hatred between the Wests and McKays—without telling anyone why the families were enemies.”

Carolyn drummed her pen on the table. “It’s sad the McKays and the Wests were just sucked into that mindset. When I first started dating Carson? Even my mother didn’t know the issue between the McKays and Wests. At least that first generation. And I did not appreciate when Mom finally told me that she did sneak around with Jed McKay for a month or so when she was dating our father. So yeah, Jed McKay deserved to get his ass kicked by Dad because we both know if the boot had been on the other foot and Eli West had been sneaking around with Jed McKay’s girl? Jed would’ve come out swinging.”

“True. Still, it’s creepy to think that our mother slept with our husbands’ father.”

“Welcome to small-town Wyoming,” Carolyn said wryly.

“Welcome to family confessions. Jesus. Neither one of us would’ve gone back through the boxes that Dad had kept or the ones we found in the attic upstairs on the McKay side if it wasn’t for Jed spilling his guts to me.”

“I hate the secrets and lies. Hate it.”

“Me too. Especially that the McKays lied to everyone. I understand why, but it makes no sense on why Jonas, aka Silas, would make a deathbed confession to his son Jed, about who he really was, because he’d gotten away with impersonating his twin nearly all his life.”

“Maybe the reason Jed told you about Silas and Jonas switching identities, before Jonas took off, and after he escaped from jail, is because you had identical McKay twins?” Carolyn suggested.

“Possibly. Jed told me that even though he was a grown man when his father told him the truth—that he was Silas, not Jonas—he had a hard time accepting that his father had killed a man.”

“It was pretty ballsy of Silas, aka Jonas, to send a letter to his twin and Dinah a couple of years later telling them that he’d settled in Montana.”

“I think our husbands would hire a private detective to track down the missing McKay descendants if they knew.”

“Agreed.”

Carolyn stared into space. “You think Charlie would search for the son Vi gave up for adoption if he knew the truth?”

“I don’t know. I was pissed when Jed threw that whopper of a secret at me. How is it right that we know Charlie and Vi have another kid when Charlie doesn’t have any idea?” Kimi shook her head. “That saying confession is good for the soul is a load of crap. I never wanted the burden of Jed’s confessions. Especially when I’m keepin’ those truths about the McKay family from my husband. Me’n Cal never fight, but if he found out that I know all this stuff? He’d really be hurt.”

“So would Carson.”

“Which is why I told you,” Kimi said. “It was eatin’ me alive.”

“I just wish we could talk to Vi about it.”

Kimi groaned. “Lord, she’ll be fit to be tied when she hears I’ve got a grandchild before she does. I’ve heard her nag and bitch at Libby about when she’s gonna make her a grandmother. The poor woman.”

“Why some women see fit to meddle in their grown children’s lives…” Carolyn looked at Kimi and they both burst out laughing. “Lord. I couldn’t even say that with a straight face.”

“That’s my cue to go.” Kimi stood. “Thanks for the ear and the whiskey.”

“Any time.”

“Before I forget, are we doin’ anything for the West reunion the weekend of the rodeo?”

“Just showing up with food, I guess, since Tracy is in charge.”

“You gonna say anything to Stuart and Janet?”

Carolyn shook her head. “I know it’s been a couple of years but I’m still mad at them. Chet and Remy know better to push me on this. At least they’ve stepped up.”